How does your child manage time in college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like his high school may have underprepared him so he's playing catch up. I attended an engineering school and freshman year really showed who had attended a rigorous high school. Those kids had it easy because they already knew more of the content. That changed sophomore year when you saw more of aptitude. The kids who worked hard and were smart excelled. Those who just had a leg up based on prior preparation peaked and sunk toward the middle.

(The other option is he relied on his AP credits to test into harder math or other courses and that was a mistake. He should be taking the normal freshman sequence.)

OP here.  DS attended one of the big 3 private schools so I assumed that he is well prepared for GT but now I am not so sure about it.  Maybe he is not as smart and prepared as I thought he should be.  I just want my old happy DS back.  I want to see him to have time for other activities like dating, music, play golf with my DH, and have lunch with me every now and then.  To me, that's too much of a price to pay for a CS degree from GT.  I want my DS to be a well rounded person, not a nerd.  At the moment, he is not sure if he wants to go back to GT for his 2nd year.  His GPA at GT is around 3.1.

[Anonymous]

My DD has really been struggling with premed at a top10. She is now finishing her JR year. She has a 3.2. She has taken courses and labs for the last 2 summers. I have offered to her numerous times that is she wants to drop to 3 classes from 4 for any semester that is ok with us. We are paying which is why I say 'ok with us'.

All you can do is give your son options. Good luck OP. It's hard to watch our kids struggle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like his high school may have underprepared him so he's playing catch up. I attended an engineering school and freshman year really showed who had attended a rigorous high school. Those kids had it easy because they already knew more of the content. That changed sophomore year when you saw more of aptitude. The kids who worked hard and were smart excelled. Those who just had a leg up based on prior preparation peaked and sunk toward the middle.

(The other option is he relied on his AP credits to test into harder math or other courses and that was a mistake. He should be taking the normal freshman sequence.)

OP here.  DS attended one of the big 3 private schools so I assumed that he is well prepared for GT but now I am not so sure about it.  Maybe he is not as smart and prepared as I thought he should be.  I just want my old happy DS back.  I want to see him to have time for other activities like dating, music, play golf with my DH, and have lunch with me every now and then.  To me, that's too much of a price to pay for a CS degree from GT.  I want my DS to be a well rounded person, not a nerd.  At the moment, he is not sure if he wants to go back to GT for his 2nd year.  His GPA at GT is around 3.1.

This is insane. You don't become a "nerd" because you have to dig in for one year, or even four years, in order to get a degree and build expertise. Well rounded is over a lifetime.

Anyways, I'm sure he'll have lots of time on his hands this summer for golf with Daddy and Daddy's friends, as well as lunch at the club with Mommy. Heaven forbid he actually work at something. #spoiledlittlerichboy #silverspoon

[Anonymous]

It could be the CS major, which is tough and time-consuming. My DD attends a LAC as a STEM major (not CS) and says that even her friends there spend their entire weekends debugging and working on labs and homework, so it's hard to hang out with them. One of them had to quit playing cello in the college orchestra and is barely managing a work study job and her CS major but has good grades. The other friend has a GPA around 2.5 but has always been fairly happy-go-lucky but is seriously considering changing her major.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have no idea. They handle it. One of my kids was majoring in chem and minoring in music. Another majored in legal studies and minored in creative writing.

No, college kids don't have as much time to "play" as they did in high school. This should not be a shock to a college student or their parent.

Times have changed, I guess. I felt like I played way more in college than I did in high school. Probably that's because "regular life" felt more like playing -- for example, eating dinner in the college cafeteria with other kids my age felt more like playing than eating dinner at home with my parents during high school.

Agree. I had lots of free time in college. Your sons experience sounds miserable, OP. What does HE want to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like his high school may have underprepared him so he's playing catch up. I attended an engineering school and freshman year really showed who had attended a rigorous high school. Those kids had it easy because they already knew more of the content. That changed sophomore year when you saw more of aptitude. The kids who worked hard and were smart excelled. Those who just had a leg up based on prior preparation peaked and sunk toward the middle.

(The other option is he relied on his AP credits to test into harder math or other courses and that was a mistake. He should be taking the normal freshman sequence.)

I attended a very tough program at college. My HS was not rigorous so I had to put in an insane amount of hours in the first year to catch up. Some of my classmates who came from rigorous HS had an easy and relaxing first year. It all equilized in year two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have no idea. They handle it. One of my kids was majoring in chem and minoring in music. Another majored in legal studies and minored in creative writing.

No, college kids don't have as much time to "play" as they did in high school. This should not be a shock to a college student or their parent.

Times have changed, I guess. I felt like I played way more in college than I did in high school. Probably that's because "regular life" felt more like playing -- for example, eating dinner in the college cafeteria with other kids my age felt more like playing than eating dinner at home with my parents during high school.

Agree. I had lots of free time in college. Your sons experience sounds miserable, OP. What does HE want to do?

OP here.  He is not sure if he wants to go back to GT but he still wants to major in CS.  He will be home this weekend, and has a week to unwind.  After that, he will be volunteering 8am-6pm at the soup kitchens and delivering meals to people in need for the entire summer.  He also signed up to drive less fortunate people on weekends to local dental offices that offer free dental care services.  

He is also looking at transferring to GMU or VT as possible destinations. I don't care where he ends up, I just want my happy DS back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like his high school may have underprepared him so he's playing catch up. I attended an engineering school and freshman year really showed who had attended a rigorous high school. Those kids had it easy because they already knew more of the content. That changed sophomore year when you saw more of aptitude. The kids who worked hard and were smart excelled. Those who just had a leg up based on prior preparation peaked and sunk toward the middle.

(The other option is he relied on his AP credits to test into harder math or other courses and that was a mistake. He should be taking the normal freshman sequence.)

That's what I was thinking as well. He is actually having to do hard work and not just easy busy work. Non engineering classes are going to also require more work then he might be used to. It's a learning curve and next year it probably won't be as difficult. He also probably has to learn to "work smarter not harder" and I seriously hate that phrase but it is true. His study habits that worked in high school might be too inefficient for the volume of studying he needs to do now and he needs to get new study skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spring semester will be done in a few days and DS is really struggling with his freshman year at Geprge Tech majoring in Computer Science.  He takes 16 credits in Falls and Spring semester.  In HS, he spent about 2 1/2 hours a day studying so he had lot of times to play piano, guitar, and saxophone.  On weekends, he didn't study and spent most of his time with sports and music activities.  

At George Tech, he spends at least 50 hours outside of the classroom studying just to keep up, and he is still struggling.  He neither has time to date or any other activities, has not touched his guitar and saxphone in months.  He hasn't been to the golf course except during the Christmas break.  He even had to study during Spring break just to keep up.  He said that CS is so hard here.  He is barely keeping his head above water.  He is just now a shell of himself.  I am seriously considering of pulling him out GT so that he can attend somewhere else.  At this point, I don't know where.

How do people major in CS at Georgia Tech or other places have time for other activities besides studying all the time?  Love to hear what you have to say.

He shouldn't be taking 16 credits/ semester. Maybe there are one or two semesters in college you can do that, but Freshman year it should be 12 to start, get an understanding of the work load and after-class time commitment, and get good grades. It's too late to fix the real problem, but he can dial it back sophomore year.

That said, "he only golfs on breaks" is not the sad story you think it is.

[Anonymous]

Went to a Big 3 and loves to volunteer and is struggling with CS? Maybe it’s not the major for him. Maybe he’d prefer something more people oriented?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have no idea. They handle it. One of my kids was majoring in chem and minoring in music. Another majored in legal studies and minored in creative writing.

No, college kids don't have as much time to "play" as they did in high school. This should not be a shock to a college student or their parent.

Times have changed, I guess. I felt like I played way more in college than I did in high school. Probably that's because "regular life" felt more like playing -- for example, eating dinner in the college cafeteria with other kids my age felt more like playing than eating dinner at home with my parents during high school.

Agree. I had lots of free time in college. Your sons experience sounds miserable, OP. What does HE want to do?

OP here.  He is not sure if he wants to go back to GT but he still wants to major in CS.  He will be home this weekend, and has a week to unwind.  After that, he will be volunteering 8am-6pm at the soup kitchens and delivering meals to people in need for the entire summer.  He also signed up to drive less fortunate people on weekends to local dental offices that offer free dental care services.  

He is also looking at transferring to GMU or VT as possible destinations. I don't care where he ends up, I just want my happy DS back.

OP, are you a troll? This tale is getting taller and taller.

[Anonymous]

I have a relative currently at GT majoring in CS. He seems to have plenty of time to date, be active in a fraternity, and even got a part time job after first year, all while maintaining a very strong GPA.

Since he was a child, he loved coding and just always seemed to live and breathe it, so it seems to come relatively easy to him. He attended a strong suburban public school but it wasn't tech focused or anything like that. He seems happy and works hard but loves it and has never expressed that he is particularly stressed.

So maybe CS is just not his natural forte and he needs to either work this hard to be successful, which is fine, or he needs to switch into an easier program.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Spring semester will be done in a few days and DS is really struggling with his freshman year at Geprge Tech majoring in Computer Science.  He takes 16 credits in Falls and Spring semester.  In HS, he spent about 2 1/2 hours a day studying so he had lot of times to play piano, guitar, and saxophone.  On weekends, he didn't study and spent most of his time with sports and music activities.  

At George Tech, he spends at least 50 hours outside of the classroom studying just to keep up, and he is still struggling.  He neither has time to date or any other activities, has not touched his guitar and saxphone in months.  He hasn't been to the golf course except during the Christmas break.  He even had to study during Spring break just to keep up.  He said that CS is so hard here.  He is barely keeping his head above water.  He is just now a shell of himself.  I am seriously considering of pulling him out GT so that he can attend somewhere else.  At this point, I don't know where.

How do people major in CS at Georgia Tech or other places have time for other activities besides studying all the time?  Love to hear what you have to say.

He shouldn't be taking 16 credits/ semester. Maybe there are one or two semesters in college you can do that, but Freshman year it should be 12 to start, get an understanding of the work load and after-class time commitment, and get good grades. It's too late to fix the real problem, but he can dial it back sophomore year.

That said, "he only golfs on breaks" is not the sad story you think it is.

THIS there is no reason to take 16 or 17 credits every semester. 13 or 14 should be fine. I assume he came in with some AP credit as well. My DD came in with about 20 credits for AP and DE and takes 13 or 14 credits each semester. She is taking a summer course just because she couldn't get into it in the fall and it's required for her major, but she will graduate on time easily.

my DS took 17 credits this spring because he was bored last fall... and he has managed it well and has a social life, but he will stick to lower amount going forward.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have no idea. They handle it. One of my kids was majoring in chem and minoring in music. Another majored in legal studies and minored in creative writing.

No, college kids don't have as much time to "play" as they did in high school. This should not be a shock to a college student or their parent.

Times have changed, I guess. I felt like I played way more in college than I did in high school. Probably that's because "regular life" felt more like playing -- for example, eating dinner in the college cafeteria with other kids my age felt more like playing than eating dinner at home with my parents during high school.

Agree. I had lots of free time in college. Your sons experience sounds miserable, OP. What does HE want to do?

OP here.  He is not sure if he wants to go back to GT but he still wants to major in CS.  He will be home this weekend, and has a week to unwind.  After that, he will be volunteering 8am-6pm at the soup kitchens and delivering meals to people in need for the entire summer.  He also signed up to drive less fortunate people on weekends to local dental offices that offer free dental care services.  

He is also looking at transferring to GMU or VT as possible destinations. I don't care where he ends up, I just want my happy DS back.

OP, are you a troll? This tale is getting taller and taller.

Yes, OP is definitely a troll!!!

[Anonymous]

I have no idea. Whatever they’re doing is working because they made the Deans List!