If older or had trouble TTC, how long did you wait to try for next DC?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Had my first at 35 and waited a year. I was not ready for another child at that point. I tried the old fashioned way for a year and then went straight to IVF. Had my second at 38.

This was my fault plan but ended up getting pregnant naturally the second time too (after getting ready for IVF). Good luck OP!

[Anonymous]

Anything can happen. My first took a while to conceive and I had in my head that that would happen again. I got pregnant the minute I stopped preventing. And the same thing happened for #3.

For an uncomplicated vaginal delivery, there's not a lot of evidence that you "need" to wait more than 6-9 months after delivering to conceive again (despite the conventional wisdom). I'd have more paused for a complicated delivery or C-section.

It's tough because there are potential negatives on both sides: yes, you could end up never able to conceive again and regret waiting. But having two close together can be really, really tough. I had 2 under 2 (22 month age gap) and it was A LOT. Part of that was due to the personality of my older child -- she ended up being the big feelings, huge tantrums type. And that wasn't clear until she hit about 18 months, so long after I'd gotten pregnant again.

I will say though: if you are considering a very close age gap, do at least consider what your support system is like. Fortunately we have two very involved parents in this house. Do make sure you're comfortable with the division of household labor in your family before you try to add another.

[Anonymous]

I have a cousin that took 10 years to conceive their first. They didn’t have money to try IVF or any extra intervention. Had another without issues 21 months later and a surprise baby at 40.

[Anonymous]

Two miscarriages before DC1. Started trying at 9 months PP since I thought I was in for some trouble. But, got pregnant on the first try so our kids are only 17 months apart.

[Anonymous]

We had a couple miscarriages trying to conceive at 32/33. But we wanted a more comfortable age gap so still kicked the ball to 35 to start trying again. Once again multiple losses and didn’t give birth until almost 37.