Spouse is controlled by parents

[Anonymous]

If they live nearby and you only see them 1/30 days and still need to cancel and reschedule often then you may need therapy, not marriage counseling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they live nearby and you only see them 1/30 days and still need to cancel and reschedule often then you may need therapy, not marriage counseling.

Except we live in the real world so it’s not “1/30 days” it’s “1/8 weekend days” unless both OP and spouse are unemployed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early 30s and no kids. Married ~3 years. Spouse for our entire marriage has had some serious boundary/control issues with parents which was not great and we ended up seeing a marriage counselor.

To this day, If I ever say “no I’d rather not”, “maybe we can do this instead”, “X came up so maybe we can reschedule” spouse immediately goes into fight or flight mode and becomes argumentative. They talk to parents once a week and we see them once a month or so it’s not like I’m trying to estrange anyone, it’s just they have this need to ensure whatever their parents want happens without any variance or protest. They are never like this with my parents or other friends we socialize with. Many times these arguments last for days.

We are starting with another marriage counselor now but had anyone dealt with this? Does it get better?

To be fair, if you have problem with them talking to their parents once a week and meeting once a month, you need to find orphans.

Not true. I see my parents twice a year. We talk once a month.