Immigrant parents

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Question for those of you who have parents who immigrated to the US but now they are at the age where their parents (gradparents) are getting older/sick and they are flying/half living back in the country where they were born. Anyone experiencing this in their family? Is this normal?

No. State and other relative take care of the parents. I don't need to fly there for everything. They most likely will go fast when it's time to go because they some and drink too much. No need to rush there when someone is dead. They can sit in a jar and wait til I have time to bury them or have other people do it. We haven't put such burden on younger generation for a long time. Time to go, time to go. State will take them to old people's house and you just hope for the best.

Wow! What country is this? The elderly people are drinking too much? Where? Is this Russia?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Question for those of you who have parents who immigrated to the US but now they are at the age where their parents (gradparents) are getting older/sick and they are flying/half living back in the country where they were born. Anyone experiencing this in their family? Is this normal?

No. State and other relative take care of the parents. I don't need to fly there for everything. They most likely will go fast when it's time to go becuse they some and drink too much. No need to rush there when someone is dead. They can sit in a jar and wait til I have time to bury them or have other people do it. We haven't put such burden on younger generation for a long time. Time to go, time to go. State will take them to old people's house and you just hope for the best.

Wow, I don't know how I feel about your response. I think I would at least be a little concerened how they were being treated and if everything was OK??? But yeah, it seems like such a burden.

Why would they be treated badly? What world do you live in? There are cameras everywhere, and if there is someone mistreating elderly, they can do it even when I visit. We have relatives visit and there are other workers who have to report abuse. Getting money from elderly is more common than physical abuse or neglect if you insist on mistreatment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Question for those of you who have parents who immigrated to the US but now they are at the age where their parents (gradparents) are getting older/sick and they are flying/half living back in the country where they were born. Anyone experiencing this in their family? Is this normal?

No. State and other relative take care of the parents. I don't need to fly there for everything. They most likely will go fast when it's time to go because they some and drink too much. No need to rush there when someone is dead. They can sit in a jar and wait til I have time to bury them or have other people do it. We haven't put such burden on younger generation for a long time. Time to go, time to go. State will take them to old people's house and you just hope for the best.

Wow! What country is this? The elderly people are drinking too much? Where? Is this Russia?

No, but similar culture. Most people go fast when they go. We don't drag ones life out to 100 with medicines and having them under machines. The ones who take some care of their health, live longer. Most people, specially men, go fast because they never bother to go to the doctor and by the time ambulance is needed, it's too late to get them back to health. Just googled life expectancy for my country and the US, and we still outlive you. Women outlive US women, men don't outlive US men (I could've guessed that). Combined, we still outlive people in US.
My father who has drank and smoked since he was probably 18, is still kicking at 71. My mom stopped smoking but keeps a vodka bottle next to her kitchen table. They both are on some blood pressure medicines, but body can take only so much. They should go fast when it's time to go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Question for those of you who have parents who immigrated to the US but now they are at the age where their parents (gradparents) are getting older/sick and they are flying/half living back in the country where they were born. Anyone experiencing this in their family? Is this normal?

No. State and other relative take care of the parents. I don't need to fly there for everything. They most likely will go fast when it's time to go because they some and drink too much. No need to rush there when someone is dead. They can sit in a jar and wait til I have time to bury them or have other people do it. We haven't put such burden on younger generation for a long time. Time to go, time to go. State will take them to old people's house and you just hope for the best.

Wow! What country is this? The elderly people are drinking too much? Where? Is this Russia?

No, but similar culture. Most people go fast when they go. We don't drag ones life out to 100 with medicines and having them under machines. The ones who take some care of their health, live longer. Most people, specially men, go fast because they never bother to go to the doctor and by the time ambulance is needed, it's too late to get them back to health. Just googled life expectancy for my country and the US, and we still outlive you. Women outlive US women, men don't outlive US men (I could've guessed that). Combined, we still outlive people in US.
My father who has drank and smoked since he was probably 18, is still kicking at 71. My mom stopped smoking but keeps a vodka bottle next to her kitchen table. They both are on some blood pressure medicines, but body can take only so much. They should go fast when it's time to go.

This is the way it should be. The current American system of "the most important thing is saving lives" of 95 year olds is absurd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they don’t have any siblings there, they may have to go often but most who lived here for 30-40 years, find it difficult to move back as they are practically strangers to their birth towns by now.

This^.

[Anonymous]

Mine do have siblings, cousins, nieces and nephews. With a big family there is always someone's graduation, wedding, new baby, etc. They also like the weather over there better. It's very normal to go back for a while each year. Kind of like how some people spend a few months in Florida every year, but with better food!

[Anonymous]

I’m an immigrant with aging parents but my kids here in the US are still too young for me to move back to my home country. I would if they were older.