(how) do you celebrate valentine's day with your teens?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I made their beds, did their laundry, picked up plates and cups from their room, vacuumed, dusted, aired their room.

Every day is Valentine's Day!!

They should start doing some of this.

[Anonymous]

I left gift bags with their favorite snacks, gum and candy and a card at the breakfast table this morning. I do this each year.

[Anonymous]

card and small gifts and some candy

[Anonymous]

We're having steak for dinner, which we will eat in the actual dining room (lol) with candles. I'll make a heart shaped chocolate chip cookie cake and the kids and DH get little box of chocolates and the kids will get a fun, fancy bar of soap (self-serving as they need to shower more).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I made their beds, did their laundry, picked up plates and cups from their room, vacuumed, dusted, aired their room.

Every day is Valentine's Day!!

No fun!

Assuming they do this all the time and that's why mom/dad is doing it today?

Not my idea of fun either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing. I do nothing.

In ES, we were told to send in cards for the whole class, so I used to make an effort to do it.

I do not want them to become entitled nightmare in their real romantic relationships. Also, this is a hallmark holiday. My kids do not think too much of it.

You think that if you do something small for your kids this can make them an entitled nightmare in their romantic relationships? Shouldn't they be acknowledging V-Day in their romantic relationshps?

No. I do not want them to have an expectation that someone will do something for them for VD. They should be kind and loving to their SO every day (and we model that at home) but a fake holiday is not to be celebrated. Celebrate meaningful dates - birthdays, anniversaries etc, but this is a ridiculous day. In fact, if they have a good romantic relationship I hope they actually boycott and not celebrate VD (just like we do!!).

I did not grow up in this country so I was not used to VD. The very first year I was here, I was at a Giant doing groceries in the evening and a whole bunch of really nervous and anxious men were at the checkout lane clutching flowers and a box of chocolates in their work clothes. I realized that these guys are too scared to go home without something for their wives/gfs and they are stopping at Giant to pick up whatever was left on their way back from home. It was such a disgusting and unromantic sight that I vowed that I would never celebrate this fake holiday. Especially in a country where divorce rates are 50%.

Who are we celebrating anyways??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're having steak for dinner, which we will eat in the actual dining room (lol) with candles. I'll make a heart shaped chocolate chip cookie cake and the kids and DH get little box of chocolates and the kids will get a fun, fancy bar of soap (self-serving as they need to shower more).

That sounds really nice, PP! And the soap is an excellent idea, I might steal it!

[Anonymous]

Small gifts and chocolates. I'll probably order the heart-shaped pizza for dinner -- DD loves those!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're having steak for dinner, which we will eat in the actual dining room (lol) with candles. I'll make a heart shaped chocolate chip cookie cake and the kids and DH get little box of chocolates and the kids will get a fun, fancy bar of soap (self-serving as they need to shower more).

That sounds really nice, PP! And the soap is an excellent idea, I might steal it!

+1
where do you find heart shaped soaps?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I made their beds, did their laundry, picked up plates and cups from their room, vacuumed, dusted, aired their room.

Every day is Valentine's Day!!

No fun!

Assuming they do this all the time and that's why mom/dad is doing it today?

Not my idea of fun either.

No, no. My teens don't do anything at home. I do all of this for them. I want them to get used to living in a well-run house for most of their childhood and teen years, so that when they leave the house and move into their own space as adults - they cannot stand living in a messy home.
Setting standards for what matters in life.

[Anonymous]

I say “Happy Valentine’s Day!” and gave a hug to the one that likes hug, and a ride to school to the other one. My kids have plenty of junk and sweet food in their lives. No need to pile on more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing. I do nothing.

In ES, we were told to send in cards for the whole class, so I used to make an effort to do it.

I do not want them to become entitled nightmare in their real romantic relationships. Also, this is a hallmark holiday. My kids do not think too much of it.

You think that if you do something small for your kids this can make them an entitled nightmare in their romantic relationships? Shouldn't they be acknowledging V-Day in their romantic relationshps?

No. I do not want them to have an expectation that someone will do something for them for VD. They should be kind and loving to their SO every day (and we model that at home) but a fake holiday is not to be celebrated. Celebrate meaningful dates - birthdays, anniversaries etc, but this is a ridiculous day. In fact, if they have a good romantic relationship I hope they actually boycott and not celebrate VD (just like we do!!).

I did not grow up in this country so I was not used to VD. The very first year I was here, I was at a Giant doing groceries in the evening and a whole bunch of really nervous and anxious men were at the checkout lane clutching flowers and a box of chocolates in their work clothes. I realized that these guys are too scared to go home without something for their wives/gfs and they are stopping at Giant to pick up whatever was left on their way back from home. It was such a disgusting and unromantic sight that I vowed that I would never celebrate this fake holiday. Especially in a country where divorce rates are 50%.

Who are we celebrating anyways??

Thing is, your future in laws most likely did grow up here celebrating Valentines and expecting reciprocation. Maybe gift giving isn’t your thing, but it’s a love language for others, and there’s nothing wrong with gifting your significant other with a card and flowers to celebrate a holiday!

[Anonymous]

Card, small box of chocolates, small gift, heart shaped dinner.

[Anonymous]

DH and I used to celebrate it more pre-kids. DD's birthday is the 18th, so Valentine's Day has ended up being far less important in our house in the run-up to that celebration. DH still always gets flowers for me, and a smaller bouquet for DD. We all exchange cards and some sort of small gift. This year DS and DD are each getting a small gift. DH is getting a Starbucks gift card, and a promise to start "dating" again now that Covid rates are coming back down.

We order take-out and have chocolate for dessert.

Nothing super big or expensive, just enough to make a random winter day a bit brighter.

[Anonymous]

I always got a little heart shaped box of terrible grocery store chocolates, so I am continuing that tradition with my kids.

I think teens need some of this from their parents. Because there can be a lot of angst and turmoil over the fact that they don't have a romantic partner on V-day. So I want to bring some that love portion into our home, even if they roll their eyes and seem not to care.