Toddler doesn't listen

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would check your language--

"Are you ready for bath?" (Heck no, Im still playing).
Better: it's bath time!

"Can you throw this away?" (I can but I don't wanna!)
Better: throw this in the trash can

"It's time to leave the park, ok?" (Nope, not ok)
Better: "it's time to leave the park.

A lot of parents tack on that "ok?" To their communication with their toddlers and preschoolers and it really can cause some of the not listening.

+1. Plus, it's easier when there is structure or a "system" you can point to. That's why the "it's time to do X" works. It makes it less of a personal battle between what you want and what they want; it's simply time to do thing X. It works on adults, too

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would check your language--

"Are you ready for bath?" (Heck no, Im still playing).
Better: it's bath time!

"Can you throw this away?" (I can but I don't wanna!)
Better: throw this in the trash can

"It's time to leave the park, ok?" (Nope, not ok)
Better: "it's time to leave the park.

A lot of parents tack on that "ok?" To their communication with their toddlers and preschoolers and it really can cause some of the not listening.

+1. Plus, it's easier when there is structure or a "system" you can point to. That's why the "it's time to do X" works. It makes it less of a personal battle between what you want and what they want; it's simply time to do thing X. It works on adults, too

+2 Age 3 was when I realized that the reason kids like schedules is that it allows them to feel in control. You would think it's the opposite since the schedule is imposed on them. But they don't really notice that part. What they notice is that when they are eating breakfast, they know that next they'll get dressed and after that they'll brush teeth. And the KNOWING is what makes them feel in control. Otherwise, they are just going through life with adults popping in periodically to say "okay, stop what you are currently doing and do this other thing that you had no idea was an option right now." It's so stressful for them! Their brains really struggle with transition from one activity to the next and if it feels like the activity comes out of left field, sometimes the freak out. Even if it's something they enjoy! My kid at age 3/4 would get mad if we suggested riding their bike to a park, unless it was a planned activity. She even used to tell us "I like it when we eat dinner at the same time every day." Or "we should always go to school this way." It makes them feel secure to know what's happening next and not have to be told all the time.