When do kids burn out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that the kids who want to play soccer 24/7 are less likely to burn out than the kids who are being pushed into playing more than they want to.

The difference is when kids do something like soccer because they love it versus kids doing it for parents’ ego fulfillment. Some parents force things including making their kiddos do a sport or other activity they don’t find passion for. Parents sign their kids for ever soccer activity they hear about. FOMO is contagious and these parents assume that because their children do every single activity in soccer their children are elite but reality is that their children have a horrible first touch, lack of soccer IQ and do not how to read the game which results in bad or no passes, no runs, only chasing the opositor team player for 90 percent of the game instead of developing opportunities for their own team.

I don't know what kind of pu55ies some of these parents raise, but, if I made my kids play a sport they didn't want to, they'd make my frickin life miserable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They get burned out when it gets boring.

parents of the average talented player push "my kid works harder than everyone else"..."hard work beats talent every time" message to the point of nauseam. then the talent rises to the top and those kids work just as hard and in many cases harder and smarter. it would be awesome if there was a ton of opportunity at the top for all these kids. the reality is there isn't and it's getting harder. suddenly the message becomes my kid got "burned out". it happens at all different ages and I'm sure some kids do get sick of playing, but the "my kid CHOSE not to play in college because they wanted a real college experience"..."my kid was getting recruited but got burned out"..."my kid went to college and never saw the field because xyz" message gets old. the funnel gets smaller with each step. the talent gets better. the kids get stronger, faster...some can, some can't overcome serious injuries and most of them work as hard as everyone else and want it bad. there is nothing wrong with saying my kid was a good player and it didn't work out for whatever reasons, especially as a parent. i've watched so many parents over the years...especially on the girls side...push the agenda they want and the kid just has no shot of meeting the parents goal.

[Anonymous]

Funny, the couple Ive seen burn out on DD's team were the stars.

[Anonymous]

Most have by Junior/Senior year of high school if they know they won't play in college. They might still play for fun--but they no longer want the grind of sitting in a car and giving up weekends when a social life and the fun of college is staring them straight in the face. There is a lot of sacrifice to playing year-round and traveling constantly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that the kids who want to play soccer 24/7 are less likely to burn out than the kids who are being pushed into playing more than they want to.

The difference is when kids do something like soccer because they love it versus kids doing it for parents’ ego fulfillment. Some parents force things including making their kiddos do a sport or other activity they don’t find passion for. Parents sign their kids for ever soccer activity they hear about. FOMO is contagious and these parents assume that because their children do every single activity in soccer their children are elite but reality is that their children have a horrible first touch, lack of soccer IQ and do not how to read the game which results in bad or no passes, no runs, only chasing the opositor team player for 90 percent of the game instead of developing opportunities for their own team.

Great post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They get burned out when it gets boring.

parents of the average talented player push "my kid works harder than everyone else"..."hard work beats talent every time" message to the point of nauseam. then the talent rises to the top and those kids work just as hard and in many cases harder and smarter. it would be awesome if there was a ton of opportunity at the top for all these kids. the reality is there isn't and it's getting harder. suddenly the message becomes my kid got "burned out". it happens at all different ages and I'm sure some kids do get sick of playing, but the "my kid CHOSE not to play in college because they wanted a real college experience"..."my kid was getting recruited but got burned out"..."my kid went to college and never saw the field because xyz" message gets old. the funnel gets smaller with each step. the talent gets better. the kids get stronger, faster...some can, some can't overcome serious injuries and most of them work as hard as everyone else and want it bad. there is nothing wrong with saying my kid was a good player and it didn't work out for whatever reasons, especially as a parent. i've watched so many parents over the years...especially on the girls side...push the agenda they want and the kid just has no shot of meeting the parents goal.

As a kid that played on an undefeated star team all throughout my youth and high school---National championship, so many state championships, including varsity as Freshmen and a state Championship. Even the 'stars' burn out. I had been playing since I could walk and by the time I was mid-high school and I started wanting my weekends to go out with friends and start living a normal fun social life, soccer started to take a back seat in my mind. Age 5-18 was enough.

It did give me a lifelong love of exercise which I channeled into running and exercise challenges the rest of my life. But, I didn't even touch a soccer ball once I got to college until 30s when I had kids and started kicking it around with them.

[Anonymous]

Geez, what a bunch of weirdos

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that the kids who want to play soccer 24/7 are less likely to burn out than the kids who are being pushed into playing more than they want to.

The difference is when kids do something like soccer because they love it versus kids doing it for parents’ ego fulfillment. Some parents force things including making their kiddos do a sport or other activity they don’t find passion for. Parents sign their kids for ever soccer activity they hear about. FOMO is contagious and these parents assume that because their children do every single activity in soccer their children are elite but reality is that their children have a horrible first touch, lack of soccer IQ and do not how to read the game which results in bad or no passes, no runs, only chasing the opositor team player for 90 percent of the game instead of developing opportunities for their own team.

I don't know what kind of pu55ies some of these parents raise, but, if I made my kids play a sport they didn't want to, they'd make my frickin life miserable.

Ha. I wish my oldest son (16) would stop liking it. It's been a pain in my *ss since the early days.

The other one loves basketball but is short. He excels at soccer, but doesn't love it. He's content where he is at soccer and doesn't practice on his own like older one.

I keep driving them because they still want to do it. I have always searched for the first 'I don't want to go to practice (like early baseball...when I was like 'hot damn'!!!...oh let's make this your last season then!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Burnout is a cop out... We dont ask when do kids burnout from school or going to church. so why do we choose to point the finger at other activities? Im not arguing personal priorities just the fact any activities should be looked at objectively. Many people go through life with blinders on. They dont understand any and all activities pull from an individuals personal limits. Everyone is an individual and everyone handles the stress of life on different levels.

It's not a cop out to not want to sit in a frickin' car to Richmond or VA Beach or South Carolina or drive to shitsville parts of Maryland and southern VA.

They can still play sports for fun. Mine are out on the basketball court or playing pick up soccer every time they aren't in school or at a 'real' practice. And, they have a lot more fun when it's just their friends and strangers with 'NO RULES' or refs or crazy parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They get burned out when it gets boring.

parents of the average talented player push "my kid works harder than everyone else"..."hard work beats talent every time" message to the point of nauseam. then the talent rises to the top and those kids work just as hard and in many cases harder and smarter. it would be awesome if there was a ton of opportunity at the top for all these kids. the reality is there isn't and it's getting harder. suddenly the message becomes my kid got "burned out". it happens at all different ages and I'm sure some kids do get sick of playing, but the "my kid CHOSE not to play in college because they wanted a real college experience"..."my kid was getting recruited but got burned out"..."my kid went to college and never saw the field because xyz" message gets old. the funnel gets smaller with each step. the talent gets better. the kids get stronger, faster...some can, some can't overcome serious injuries and most of them work as hard as everyone else and want it bad. there is nothing wrong with saying my kid was a good player and it didn't work out for whatever reasons, especially as a parent. i've watched so many parents over the years...especially on the girls side...push the agenda they want and the kid just has no shot of meeting the parents goal.

As a kid that played on an undefeated star team all throughout my youth and high school---National championship, so many state championships, including varsity as Freshmen and a state Championship. Even the 'stars' burn out. I had been playing since I could walk and by the time I was mid-high school and I started wanting my weekends to go out with friends and start living a normal fun social life, soccer started to take a back seat in my mind. Age 5-18 was enough.

It did give me a lifelong love of exercise which I channeled into running and exercise challenges the rest of my life. But, I didn't even touch a soccer ball once I got to college until 30s when I had kids and started kicking it around with them.

Sounds like you made a great choice for yourself. Did you turn down many college offers? Was that easy to walk away from?

[Anonymous]

I wonder if my kid will stop liking it later than other kids. He has ADHD, which doesn't affect his soccer playing, but seems to make him hit many social and interests-related milestones later than peers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Funny, the couple Ive seen burn out on DD's team were the stars.

I have seen some really talented girls quite. They were very skilled and liked those one or two touch passing. The coach did not like that style and the other girls could not play that way.

[Anonymous]

My 24/7 soccer loving kids never burned out. One is very talented and playing D1 now, and even a toxic coaching dynamic has not affected his love for the game. All his U10 teammates and rivals on other teams who were similarly obsessed are all playing in college as well, though some are quitting due to coach issues. They get together and play when they are home for breaks. My moderately talented but no less obsessed kid played club soccer in college and is now in an adult league, which is a great way to meet people in new cities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know some burn out at 5 and others 45 but is there an age when there is a palpable trend in kids burning out? If your kid cannot get enough of soccer 24/7 when does that wane?

Kids do not burn out as much as they become interested in other things. Moving on to another interest or activity should not be seen as a negative so stop calling it “burn out”. Do we say girls burn out of Girl Scouts or do they just have other interests?

Middle school years is about when kids start to try new things and forge their own identity and it is perfectly normal.

Meow!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Age 13.

70% of kids quit sports by age 13, with burnout being one of the leading causes.

https://www.latimes.com/opinion/story/2021-04-10/youth-sports-mental-health-pandemic

Yep. I was about to say “at puberty,” but this post does it in a nicer manner.