How do I teach my teen to value herself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never hang out with a mom whose daughter is being a little witch to my daughter.

This! Why are you putting her in this situation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:*Show* her she is valued by protecting her from these people. Do not make her engage w them.

+1

I think ideally she does best by learning to stand up for herself so that people don’t treat her that way, not just by avoiding them.

[Anonymous]

Groups of 3 girls are bad news. It will always be 2 vs 1. She will figure it out. But, it will be on her time, not your yours. Parents have got to let their kids learn how to navigate these issues instead of jumping in to save them. If you continue to do this, they will never learn.

[Anonymous]

Sports helped me but agree, outside activities, hobbies, volunteering are a good place to start. I know horseback riding can be therapeutic and provides an outlet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She has learned to be spineless from you…. You are asking her to stick up for herself with her friends, when you won’t de gage in a conversation with yours. She learned the behavior somewhere and she is mirroring it.

I agree. I get how this can happen, but OP, think about what you are modeling for your kid. You are acting like keeping the peace with your friends comes first and you are willing to accept bad behavior-exactly what you don't want your daughter to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She has learned to be spineless from you…. You are asking her to stick up for herself with her friends, when you won’t de gage in a conversation with yours. She learned the behavior somewhere and she is mirroring it.

I agree. I get how this can happen, but OP, think about what you are modeling for your kid. You are acting like keeping the peace with your friends comes first and you are willing to accept bad behavior-exactly what you don't want your daughter to do.

x100000!!
Cut them off! You both need new friends. Also, the other mothers know - they are just turning a blind eye.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She has learned to be spineless from you…. You are asking her to stick up for herself with her friends, when you won’t de gage in a conversation with yours. She learned the behavior somewhere and she is mirroring it.

I agree. I get how this can happen, but OP, think about what you are modeling for your kid. You are acting like keeping the peace with your friends comes first and you are willing to accept bad behavior-exactly what you don't want your daughter to do.

x100000!!
Cut them off! You both need new friends. Also, the other mothers know - they are just turning a blind eye.

NP here who is unfortunately seeing a similar situation. What do you say to the moms? How do you say it? I wouldn’t be able to hang out with them, but I’d want to say something just in case they’re truly unaware of their duaghters’behaviour. How to handle?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Larla, honey, I've realized that Darla and Carla are exclusionary and rude to you. You deserve better, so let's not hang out with them."

+1 You're prioritizing your close friendship with the moms over a safe social environment for your DD. How can you teach yourself to value your DD?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She has learned to be spineless from you…. You are asking her to stick up for herself with her friends, when you won’t de gage in a conversation with yours. She learned the behavior somewhere and she is mirroring it.

I agree. I get how this can happen, but OP, think about what you are modeling for your kid. You are acting like keeping the peace with your friends comes first and you are willing to accept bad behavior-exactly what you don't want your daughter to do.

x100000!!
Cut them off! You both need new friends. Also, the other mothers know - they are just turning a blind eye.

NP here who is unfortunately my seeing a similar situation. What do you say to the moms? How do you say it? I wouldn’t be able to hang out with them, but I’d want to say something just in case they’re truly unaware of their duaghters’behaviour. How to handle?

Ditto. A lot of these moms put their DDs on the pedestal, as if they could do know wrong. They refuse to confront these issues even if their daughters are the abusers, because nothing is at stake for them