Who handles house-related stuff in your marriage?

[Anonymous]

My DH handles almost anything that requires calling an outside person to come. Home repairs, cleaning service, gutter cleaning, landscaping etc. Part of this is because he's Hispanic and many of these people are also Hispanic, so he likes to chit chat. But even the white a/c repair dude is his friend now. I don't want to talk to anyone!

I deal with almost everything related to the children. We split bills, though he does more of these than I do. I do almost all the cleaning and organizing (outside of a monthly cleaning person).

[Anonymous]

DH does most of the big maintenance and structural stuff in the house. If there is a leak in the roof, that's on him. I do most of the day to day cleaning and maintenance.

Outside is more or less the same. DH does the big things and the one-off things. If a tree falls down in a storm, it's on him to break out the chain saw. I do the mowing, weeding, planting, hedges, etc.

I do most of the grocery shopping and food prep, although DH has started doing more. Default is more or less that I will do it though unless DH says that he is going to cook that day.

I also had been doing a lot of the kid stuff, but, again, he is taking over a little more.

[Anonymous]

DH. I’m a stay at home parent and he is extremely busy with work so it’s not fair how much he works on the house, but he insists on doing it. I have tried a few things and did them wrong so he doesn’t trust me. But I think he still gets irritated that he is spending so much time on it and I’m not. I wish he would just pay someone else to do it but he doesn’t want to do that either.

[Anonymous]

So grateful to read 9:09's post, whose husband is incompetent. My husband can put gas in the car, and handles all carpools and distance driving. He does make breakfast, including fresh coffee, every morning (this is big). Other than that, it's on me. SO irritating and depressing sometimes, but he is thoughtful in other ways. Still, I lost a lot of respect for him after I realized how little he could do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So grateful to read 9:09's post, whose husband is incompetent. My husband can put gas in the car, and handles all carpools and distance driving. He does make breakfast, including fresh coffee, every morning (this is big). Other than that, it's on me. SO irritating and depressing sometimes, but he is thoughtful in other ways. Still, I lost a lot of respect for him after I realized how little he could do.

My husband isn’t handy (neither am I), but he still handles stuff like getting people to do the yardwork, gutters, etc. I handle stuff like major remodeling. But he cares a lot about decor and weighs in there.

[Anonymous]

DH. His mom is obsessed with home improvement and maintenance so he learned a lot from her, and I find it unspeakably boring. I handle the financial/investment aspect (we own multiple properties) but he handles the hands-on renovation and maintenance. I WFH so I am the one to interact with contractors but it's really him who tracks everything and makes the meaningful house decisions.