Who handles house-related stuff in your marriage?

[Anonymous]

We recently bought our first house and I have been doing everything relating to work on it — either doing it myself or figuring out what needs to be done and finding the right person and managing the project. I’m just curious how typical this is, especially for families with a SAHP — I assume if you’re at home you let the contractor in, but who’s the one learning all about how houses work?

[Anonymous]

Mostly me. Has nothing to do with working or not. He will do some of the physical labor.

[Anonymous]

The magic fairy. Again.

[Anonymous]

I'm the DW, I have found many of the service-related people. DH deals with appointments and maintenance. We have both overseen major repairs and renovations.

[Anonymous]

We’re extremely handy. Dh does every thing and I decorate/purchase items/come up with a renovation plan. I joke that we’re like pinky and the brain

[Anonymous]

Its shared in our household. We both work though. Dh is better at changing light fixtures, taps and washers in the bathroom or changing the air conditioning filters, clearing the gutters, installing the alarm etc.

I maintain the garden, keep the place clean and organised, I pay all the bills etc.

The right person to manage a project is the one who is interested in it. I was interested when we re did our kitchen and organised it all. Getting the place re-painted DH is organising that including the colours.

[Anonymous]

Husband does repairs and handles tech stuff like heating/AC, water heater, appliances, plus trash, yard stuff, recycling, most dishes & laundry.

I handle decorating, cooking, folding clothes, and ordering kids’ clothes.

We both work. And work together on finding contractors for big projects.

[Anonymous]

I do everything house related, soup to nuts. I’m pretty handy and I also handle the pros. My husband doesn’t know how any of the systems in the house work and I’ve never seen him use a drill. I’m the wife.

[Anonymous]

My DH handles it mostly because he knows a lot about home repairs and is very capable of doing a lot of it himself. He deals with contractors and supervises any big projects we have to do. He also stays on top of maintenance tasks. I help on big projects he does himself, but it mostly consists of me being his apprentice and fetching whatever tool he needs (after he shows me a picture and describes precisely where it is because the only tools I recognize are a hammer and a screwdriver).

But I handle other things for the house and our family. It's a natural division of labor for us based on our strengths and abilities.

[Anonymous]

DW does all the small things - like house related stuff, children, etc.

I take care of the big things - like if the house should pass the $1.75 or $3.5 trillion bill and things of those sort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DW does all the small things - like house related stuff, children, etc.

I take care of the big things - like if the house should pass the $1.75 or $3.5 trillion bill and things of those sort.

what about the infrequent "big things". If the houes passes some policy bill what are you going to do? Move to Panama?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do everything house related, soup to nuts. I’m pretty handy and I also handle the pros. My husband doesn’t know how any of the systems in the house work and I’ve never seen him use a drill. I’m the wife.

+1 husband is incompetent and breaks more things worse when "looking at them" than not. Plus he's a sucker with servicers or agents so no longer talks to them.

[Anonymous]

Up until recently it was:

Household chores -- me (DW)
Garage chores -- DH
Household bill management -- DH
Managing cleaners -- me
Managing lawn team -- DH
Overseeing the build of our house some years ago -- both of us, though I was the one who almost always had to drop work for house appointments and ending up going part-time as a result (+ young kids)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DW does all the small things - like house related stuff, children, etc.

I take care of the big things - like if the house should pass the $1.75 or $3.5 trillion bill and things of those sort.

I hope her hands are small enough to wrap around that level of chode.

[Anonymous]

DH does vast majority of it from paying the bills, keeping up with maintenance and repairs, our yard, scheduling and hiring gardeners or landscapers, maintaining the cat litter, everything tech, holiday decorations, and ordering the bulk household items like Clorox wipes, paper towels, TP Etc.

I take care of scheduling and paying the housekeeping twice a month, all the grocery shopping, cooking, keeping organization, maintenance of smaller household items like hand soap, shampoo, etc. I also manage and handle everything related to the kids - so play dates, birthday parties, sports, pediatrician, dentist, buying clothes and shoes, school related stuff like parent teacher conferences, and I also do all the volunteering - coaching sports, school volunteering etc.

DH works full time, I work part time for the most part.