Kids attending the same school?

[Anonymous]

I am deciding on schools for my children and was wondering if anyone had insight on the pros and cons of sending your kids to the same school.

I am thinking of sending my two oldest (boy and girl) to two different schools (both private), but then again, think having them (and my third eventually) at the same school would be terrific.

I obviously understand the commuting point (not an issue here; schools are less than one mile apart) and it would be nice not to have to become part of two different school communities, but any other issues I should be thinking about? Anyone face this same decision?

Thanks much.

[Anonymous]

What's wrong with having them in the same school?

[Anonymous]

sometimes you get discounts for putting sibs at the same school...
also, you can combine annual giving to the school and not have to pay at two places
also, close-by privates in this area can be hyper-competitive; why have your kids be feeling competitive towards one another as they grow up?

[Anonymous]

OP here, one school takes only boys. I didn't want to mention bc I didn't want this thread to go off on tangents re reasons for not sending a boy to a boys only school.

[Anonymous]

Would the girl go to all girls then? Otherwise it would seem strange.

I have kids in 2 different publics and it is a big pain. 2 PTAs, different dates for things, etc. Also, they have the same bell schedule and I can't be 2 places at once so they must take the bus.

[Anonymous]

Different break schedules are a bear to manage.

[Anonymous]

I read somewhere that boys do better in a co-ed school and girls do better in an all girl's school.

[Anonymous]

Here's the link:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2009/mar/18/secondary-schools-girls-gcse-results

[Anonymous]

3 kids, 3 different schools. All have different schedules and I have a hard time with managing. For example, 1 DC wants to take an after school class. The after school class gets out when 2nd DC needs to be picked up. Logistically, it is just a nightmare.

There are also the different teacher workday/holiday breaks. Hard to schedule non-school vacations unless you want to pull some from school.

Also, multiple events for each school - 3 book fairs, 3 toys for tots campaigns, 3 family bingo nights, etc.

We did it because each school was just the right for my child.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you are concerned about finding the right school for each child. I adore the approach!

Growing up, my brother and I went to very different schools after elementary. We had (have!) very different interests, personalities, etc.

I blossomed in a single-sex setting, where the academics were much more rigorous. My brother would NOT have responded well to any equivalent. I would have been crushed by the social demands of his school.

My parents were not the type to be involved in school activities, so that was never an issue. They came to Parents' Weekend one year and made it to a couple of theater productions in high school. I don't remember them being any more involved in my brother's school life.

Aren't yearly schedules available, so that you might compare them? Would they really be so out of sync?

Best of luck figuring this out.

How old are your children and what do they have to say about the schools?

[Anonymous]

I have 2 kids in 2 different elementary schools. THe negatives are primarly logistical.

If you are trying to work full time (both parents) scheduling can be a bit hard, unless you have a nanny or au pair or after school care at both places. Some aftercare places give you a bit of discount for the second child. My children's schools are off by an hour; one school starts at 8:15 and the other at 9:15, so trying to work out pick up and drop off time for us is just a bit of a pain.

Different breaks, different summer vacations is a thing to be considered.

Illnesses -- sounds silly but I've noticed that one illness will make the rounds of one school, and a different one will go through a different school. Twice as many opportunities for the kids to bring something home and infect their sibling.

PTA meetings, after school science programs, -- twice as many to keep track of. Twice as many fundraisers. Twice as many of everything.

But it's not impossible.

[Anonymous]

My brother and I went to the same school until mid high school when we started voicing our wishes. Mom supported our decision to go different ways but NEVER EVER attended any sporting, cultural or family event. She only attended the trimestral parents/teacher meetings.

[Anonymous]

Thanks everyone. These are some good points.

Can anyone weigh in on the emotional upside to being in the same school? Am I kidding myself to think that my son will actively watch out for and protect my daughter as they get older, that their eyes will meet in the hallway and they will say "I love you" to each other, etc. Or is it your experience that my kids will be indifferent. They are currently close and was wondering if sending them to different schools will in some way make them less close.


God speed to the poster with three kids at three different schools!

[Anonymous]

My kids are in two different elementary schools. I agree that the logistics are trickier.

I have found that it was good for my younger child to get out of her brother's shadow and have "her school." Her brother is a high achiever and she has struggled with some LD issues so this is a better situation for her.

It was nice for them to be together, though.

[Anonymous]

My younger brother and I attended the same school. The only con was that he was compared to me academically, even after I'd graduated.