Husband Getting MBA-I'm not happy

[Anonymous]

He is going back to school in January to get his MBA through some program at GW. It is costing a fortune in time and money. I'm highly irritated because we have small children, both work FT and he already has a very secure job, making a very good salary. He is in a secure field and has built a name for himself. I do not see how this will benefit him other than the fact that he can run around touting his MBA-whatever

I'm pissed, he barely discussed this with me. I have fucking enough on my plate, now we get to add 2 days of classes and lots of study time. Who the fuck do you think is going to have to get saddled with extra hours with the kids? ME. I already do a shit ton. I bring home a big ass slab of bacon, fry it up, and am the primary care giver for the kids. Now he is going to take even more time for himself?? What else are we going to have to out source now? Maybe I can pay someone to sleep for me. He already works 10hours a day, who the hell is going to help me? I should just quit my job to support his damn education experiment. Ohhhh, but if I did that, oh no, he sure does enjoy the luxuries my job provides our lives.
I would be very supportive if he career were stalled and if this were somehow critical, but it’s NOT. It will not make any difference and the ROI will be decades!!!!
OMG, I'm getting so furious just writing this.

[Anonymous]

Yikes, OP. Maybe he's scared of you and wants to be out of the house more.

[Anonymous]

Classes only two days a week? That does not sound like enough course work to be a real MBA. Sounds like an "Executive" MBA aka a vanity degree.

[Anonymous]

OP, have you told him what you just told us?

If so, what did he say?

If not, why not?

[Anonymous]

Geez, you sound like a real piece of work. You said that you are the primary caregiver for your children? Really? You also said that you work. Who is with your children during the day? Talk with your husband now and deal with the issue.

[Anonymous]

Is it too late to get a refund?

I sympathize with you OP because I'd be upset too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, have you told him what you just told us?

If so, what did he say?

If not, why not?

He dropped this bomb on me in email today, saying class was starting in January. He mentioned it in passing a few months ago, but nothing more. He is out to dinner tonight so I'm actually glad I have time for a glass of wine and to simmer down and sleep on it.

Of course I will talk to him, but I have to delicately deliver the fact that I'm shitting on his dreams.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Geez, you sound like a real piece of work. You said that you are the primary caregiver for your children? Really? You also said that you work. Who is with your children during the day? Talk with your husband now and deal with the issue.

You are a cow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Classes only two days a week? That does not sound like enough course work to be a real MBA. Sounds like an "Executive" MBA aka a vanity degree.

It does sound like an exec mba. I don't know about the GW program but the program I did was a lot of work. We were expected to do 10-15 hours a week of work outside of class at a minimum. The people who were at the top of the class did significantly more. It was intense.

I would be pissed too OP. Any significant time or monetary commitment should be a joint decision.

[Anonymous]

18:38 here - and he told you this by EMAIL? Hi honey, fyi I am spending $85k on an MBA and will be out of pocket 2 days a week plus study time. Seriously? I am pissed for you!

[Anonymous]

An exec MBA is worthless. Especially in this economy. DH got a real MBA a couple of years ago and that's worthless too. He only got it because his company paid for it and he could go part time.

Tell your DH that you signed up to culinary school and will be learning to cook 2 nights a week.

I doubt many people on this board will understand your frustration, OP. But I get it. It was a dickbag move by your DH to do it without discussing it with you. And, it's a selfish, self-serving thing to do. Frankly, it sounds like he wants to have an excuse to get out of the house more. I would love to get another degree. Lots of people would. That doesn't mean that our situations allow us to.

Set him strait.

[Anonymous]

What is the difference between an executive MBA and a real MBA? How does it look different on paper? I don't know what it is to be exact with him, but I could not imagine him going to class more than 2xs a week with ANY degree and working FT.

I agree that an MBA is worthless in this economy, I think in this economy if you put effort in extra education it should be highly skilled, highly specialized, and high demand.

My husband is a defense contractor in the intel space and what is in very high demand and paid for VERY generously is forensics (computer). When we briefly discussed this, I was arguing the merits of going back and getting a very technical certification in forensics and skipping the degree. I KNOW these guys get around $300-$400/hr. He hold the clearances and is in the space, a shift to that would not only be big money, but job security forever.

BTW, this is OP.

[Anonymous]

I have a friend in that GWU program. It's a ton of work. Oh, and she spent two weeks in India this past summer as part of it. And I would hardly call an $85k degree from GWU "useless." It's not like a degree from ITT Technical Institute.

[Anonymous]

I'm with the prior two PPs - serious dick move on the part of your not-so-D-H. And I write this as the wife of a full-time MBA student who is supporting the whole family right now. But we discussed his going back to school extensively over a couple of years, budgeted & planned for it, and it's how he needs to get ahead by making a career change.

If I were you, I'd haul your DH into counseling with you -- non-negotiable -- and get this sorted out before he starts classes and before you start incurring any costs to make this happen. This is too big of a decision with too big of an impact on your family for him to have done this unilaterally.

[Anonymous]

Woah. OP, do you and your DH normally have good communication? Dropping this kind of thing via email is seriously troubling and that would definitely piss me off. But it doesn't sound like the going back to school thing is the issue - more the lack of communication.

My DH is in law school now and left a great secure job to do it BUT he was miserable. It hasn't been easy or cheap but it has made me happy so ya know...life is short. But, we talked for months together before he made the decision.