I can’t say this to my kid’s face, of course, but...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is everyone else doing in his school? Is it the school or there’s something wrong with his application that you haven’t noticed.

This is OP. It has been tough at his school but kids have certainly got in places.

I won’t tell you his entire list in case anyone is reading this and can figure out who he is, but here is a partial.

Waitlist: Case, Tulane, VErmont
Rejected: Northeastern, Vandy, Tulane, Emory

Many of those schools require demonstrated interest.

But no tours during covid so that has been set aside in most colleges.

[Anonymous]

OP, are you full pay, or needing financial aid? Full pay is a plus when on a waitlist. Needing aid hurts chances from the waitlist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had this situation. My suggestion is to really work the waitlists and consider hiring a college counselor to coach working the waitlist. He may get a spring admit.

+1. I would hire a counselor. I wish we had. We now are doing so for grad school applications.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it's all about playing the yield protection game, then how are kids sending out 20 apps?

They're customizing 20 different apps? Each with a different set of essays, interviews, etc.?

Yes. I think this has been really tough for a lot of kids. They'll tweak an essay prepared for another school (which is not hard to do, as there are some common supplement questions). But, most kids do run out of steam at some point - supplement quality suffers. Interview prep nil.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm very sorry. That sounds really tough and the result of a lot of bad luck. I agree with all the posters telling you that you have to get a counselor or head master to work the phone for you on schools that waitlisted your kid as part of yield protection. Even public school counselors have some heft in that situation.

As a cautionary tale for others, I think it means that you have to put in the effort for demonstrated interest to your safety schools. Perhaps make sure to include your parents' alma mater and visit (for us, that was Ohio State). And you definitely have to reconsider what you think is a "match" -- schools like Emory and Tulane can never be a match, even if they were in the past and even if you know kids with lower stats get in.

This is what I don't get. Straight As, 6 APs, 1550 on the SAT, strong essay and recs. How can this not be a match at Emory, Vandy, Tulane? These schools are now filled with valedictorians with 1600s???

Fwiw, my kids are really young so I don't have a dog in this fight. I'm just baffled that a kid with straight As and 1550 can't get into Tulane now. Again, they're filling all their freshman seats with kids who were shoe-ins for Harvard 20 years ago?

I want someone to answer this too. This is really bizarre. I know a kid down the street who's mother has been bragging night and day about Emory. 1400 SAT.

Maybe that's just a coincidence. Emory range on the website is 1420-1530. So that student got lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it's all about playing the yield protection game, then how are kids sending out 20 apps?

They're customizing 20 different apps? Each with a different set of essays, interviews, etc.?

20 apps (the easy part) and custom essays (the PIA part), yes. Not every school does interviews. DC applied to 15 schools and had one interview. Could have been 4 (had the 3 other schools wanted to interview).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You grossly overestimate the power that a college counselor, even from an elite school, has. With connections, they may be able to help with process, but a threat would almost certainly backfire.

No I am NOT overestimating the power. They have plenty of power and it is their JOB. And yes it matters, even to top colleges. I have seen it happen with personal experience, even with Yale. A counselor worth a damn in a department with a trusted reputation from colleges has tremendous influence. Why do you think selective colleges visit high schools? They can even take them off the visitation list if they want.

Please note I am not saying the counselor 100% can get this student admitted. I am not. But if there is any chance they would take him, the counselor has tremendous influence when they go to bat for a particular kid.

Anonymous wrote:As demonstrated, Emory is having no trouble filling its spots and wouldn't without kids from school X. And, parents with kids at school X who think Emory might be a fit, aren't going to hold back based on the counselor's pride being hurt a prior year.

You grossly underestimate the competition for top kids. These are not customers in a restaurant where everyone's money is green. If a counselor tells a top kid "Don't bother with Emory" or any other school, it WILL have an influence and colleges don't want this. If the statement is backed up by Naviance data showing 36s rejected....

I repeat: I have seen this work multiple times, and I will not say more than that. Believe me or not, that's your choice. But what do you have to lose by trying?

No it is not the job of a college counselor to threaten admissions officers that, unless they admit some kid, future students from the HS would blackball them. And how do you think it would play out if, in retaliation, the college counselor banned Yale or some other coveted school from visiting? You think parents paying $50k/year are going to stand for that? Right.

And even if such a threat might work in the abstract, how many times do you think a school could go to that well? You think Emory or some other highly regarded school is going to take yearly threats from some college counselor to cajole this year's WL kid off the list? Not a chance. The relationship game goes both ways here and burning that bridge for a kid this year would have repercussions down the line that would not be good for the HS or its students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your situation is not "horrible" and you should not be "crushed." Every year there are kids who get in nowhere.

Your kid got into one of the schools on the list that HE CREATED. It was supposed to be a school that he could see himself attending. It sounds like he is still onboard with that plan. You are one more parent on this site who thought your kid would do better. I am sorry, but this is how he did. Your job now is to convince him you are proud of what he has accomplished (he did still work hard and do well in high school, this does not change that). You need to remind him (and yourself) why you put that school on his list.

Just take a deep breath, and look forward to the next phase of your child's growth.

PS-my child got into 7 schools but PICKED the one that was ranked lowest. Different than your situation, but I still had to hold my tongue and support her. She has EXCELLED at that school. Sometimes being a big fish in a small pond can work really well. My child's confidence has increased, and she gets recognition from professors that might not happen at a school where she was the middle of the pack. This can work well, I promise you.

lol this totally detracts from your message prior. I hope you know that.

You had to "hold your tongue" based on her pick (from a list she created as you emphasize)? You were just as caught up in rankings as OP then.

Not PP but not the same. I know it's fun to try and sharp shoot people here but the major difference is PP's kid did do better and was accepted to better schools than she ultimately chose, OP's was not. Big difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your situation is not "horrible" and you should not be "crushed." Every year there are kids who get in nowhere.

Your kid got into one of the schools on the list that HE CREATED. It was supposed to be a school that he could see himself attending. It sounds like he is still onboard with that plan. You are one more parent on this site who thought your kid would do better. I am sorry, but this is how he did. Your job now is to convince him you are proud of what he has accomplished (he did still work hard and do well in high school, this does not change that). You need to remind him (and yourself) why you put that school on his list.

Just take a deep breath, and look forward to the next phase of your child's growth.

PS-my child got into 7 schools but PICKED the one that was ranked lowest. Different than your situation, but I still had to hold my tongue and support her. She has EXCELLED at that school. Sometimes being a big fish in a small pond can work really well. My child's confidence has increased, and she gets recognition from professors that might not happen at a school where she was the middle of the pack. This can work well, I promise you.

lol this totally detracts from your message prior. I hope you know that.

You had to "hold your tongue" based on her pick (from a list she created as you emphasize)? You were just as caught up in rankings as OP then.

I disagree. The PP did not use dramatic language. She did not need someone to tell her how a parent should act in this case. She was trying to be empathetic to OP, rather than sanctimonious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your situation is not "horrible" and you should not be "crushed." Every year there are kids who get in nowhere.

Your kid got into one of the schools on the list that HE CREATED. It was supposed to be a school that he could see himself attending. It sounds like he is still onboard with that plan. You are one more parent on this site who thought your kid would do better. I am sorry, but this is how he did. Your job now is to convince him you are proud of what he has accomplished (he did still work hard and do well in high school, this does not change that). You need to remind him (and yourself) why you put that school on his list.

Just take a deep breath, and look forward to the next phase of your child's growth.

PS-my child got into 7 schools but PICKED the one that was ranked lowest. Different than your situation, but I still had to hold my tongue and support her. She has EXCELLED at that school. Sometimes being a big fish in a small pond can work really well. My child's confidence has increased, and she gets recognition from professors that might not happen at a school where she was the middle of the pack. This can work well, I promise you.

lol this totally detracts from your message prior. I hope you know that.

You had to "hold your tongue" based on her pick (from a list she created as you emphasize)? You were just as caught up in rankings as OP then.

I disagree. The PP did not use dramatic language. She did not need someone to tell her how a parent should act in this case. She was trying to be empathetic to OP, rather than sanctimonious.

What? The bolded language is clearly sanctimonious and self righteous. I do not think she was empathetic at all, which is funny because by her own admission she got caught up in the rankings frenzy as well. She is further along in the acceptance process, is all.

[Anonymous]

If I were OP, I would hire a private counselor, take a GAP year, keep the SAT scores or try again to move it up. But he shoudl take the SAT II subject matter tests and if he gets close to an 800, send them in. Princeton "highly recommends them" so DS did them. Or maybe even try the ACT. Some kids test better on the ACT than the SAT.

Meanwhile, have your head call around, as suggested. Show demonstrated interest (they are all concerned about yield). Watch those lists of undersubscribed schools. But seriously consider the gap year. It's been a horrible one for everyone I know in the rat race this year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had this situation. My suggestion is to really work the waitlists and consider hiring a college counselor to coach working the waitlist. He may get a spring admit.

How could a college counselor help work the waitlist? If there is a counselor that has connections at a particular school, then maybe I could see how someone might be able to put a thumb on the scale. Otherwise, I'm not sure how that would work.

Because they talk to the area rep for the school every year all year long and know them. It is literally their job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You grossly overestimate the power that a college counselor, even from an elite school, has. With connections, they may be able to help with process, but a threat would almost certainly backfire.

No I am NOT overestimating the power. They have plenty of power and it is their JOB. And yes it matters, even to top colleges. I have seen it happen with personal experience, even with Yale. A counselor worth a damn in a department with a trusted reputation from colleges has tremendous influence. Why do you think selective colleges visit high schools? They can even take them off the visitation list if they want.

Please note I am not saying the counselor 100% can get this student admitted. I am not. But if there is any chance they would take him, the counselor has tremendous influence when they go to bat for a particular kid.

Anonymous wrote:As demonstrated, Emory is having no trouble filling its spots and wouldn't without kids from school X. And, parents with kids at school X who think Emory might be a fit, aren't going to hold back based on the counselor's pride being hurt a prior year.

You grossly underestimate the competition for top kids. These are not customers in a restaurant where everyone's money is green. If a counselor tells a top kid "Don't bother with Emory" or any other school, it WILL have an influence and colleges don't want this. If the statement is backed up by Naviance data showing 36s rejected....

I repeat: I have seen this work multiple times, and I will not say more than that. Believe me or not, that's your choice. But what do you have to lose by trying?

No it is not the job of a college counselor to threaten admissions officers that, unless they admit some kid, future students from the HS would blackball them. And how do you think it would play out if, in retaliation, the college counselor banned Yale or some other coveted school from visiting? You think parents paying $50k/year are going to stand for that? Right.

And even if such a threat might work in the abstract, how many times do you think a school could go to that well? You think Emory or some other highly regarded school is going to take yearly threats from some college counselor to cajole this year's WL kid off the list? Not a chance. The relationship game goes both ways here and burning that bridge for a kid this year would have repercussions down the line that would not be good for the HS or its students.

I am the PP you are responding to.

Everything you have typed is incorrect. Even the parts where you paraphrased me with hyperbole.

A good college counselor has tremendous influence and admissions offices court good relationships with them. End period. You make up your own reality the way it suits you though. While you do that I'll try and give advice that might actually help this kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I give up. It’s hard to to stay optimistic. He worked his ass off at his private school, got mid-1500 on his SAT, continued his in person volunteering throughout the pandemic (which I was not excited about, but he wanted to do it). He has had one B+ his entire 4 years of college, the rest As. His teachers speak highly of him and I believe they must have written good letters.

His counselor said his list was solid. He’s been waitlisted or rejected nearly everywhere. He has one acceptance to a “likely” and that’s it. Only one place teaming and it’s a huge reach, esp this year.

It’s hard to stay positive, happy, and upbeat for my kid. He is unexcited about the one place he got in. I know I should try to point out the positives of getting in that one place but it is so hard. I wish he would defer and take a gap year. I brought it up once but he said he isn’t interested.

I’m not thrilled with his college counselor at school. She hasn’t even checked in on his to see how he is doing. I give up on that process too. He is crushed. I am crushed for him.

I’d anyone else having this horrible of a situation? And please don’t say, “my love sucks too, my daughter only got into Emory and not Brown” or some such nonsense. His safety he got in is a safety for everyone.

Your son could go to the college not his first choice, do really well and transfer. It is tough but you have to believe it will work out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son is in a similar boat. 3.9 GPA at a Big 3, perfect ACT score (36 on all sections), waitlisted at UChicago, WashU and Emory so far. College counselor had called Emory a match/likely for him.

What?!!!! What did college counselor say? What school did he get into?

This is such a depressing thread for the parent of an 8th grader to read.

OMG do not worry about someone else's college application experience, especially based on two outliers, in the middle of a pandemic.

Sorry, but these are outliers. Most kids get into plenty of schools.

Class of 2020 kid : 7/8 acceptances
Class of 2021 kid: 4/5 acceptances

Agree with PP, please don't start obsessing in 8th grade about a couple of outliers. My DD with a 3.96UW, 1 lonely AP, meh EC's, and no test scores got into 11/13 and will attend Santa Clara University in the fall. She was accepted to 2 of the schools OP mentioned.
What I would do is start the process by level setting "This is basically a lottery, schools decide based on what they want or need in the class at the point in time they read your application. That is all, it is not a reflection of who you are or who you will be. You have worked hard, but every other kid competing for a spot has worked hard too. Do not get your heart set on any particular school until you have acceptances in hand, then you can fall in love"