Entering Kindergarten at 6

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most hilarious thing is these rich white liberals who redshirt and then pretend like they are so pro-equal education for everyone. They don’t even get why that’s hypocritical.

Yup!

So tell me your opinion of retaining children in K? If a child is struggling to read in K and his teacher and parents agree he should repeat, is that also horrible and hypocritical? This is about the dumbest argument about redshirting possible. Redshirting does not cause the acheivment gap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a K teacher and I've never suggested someone be held back because having older kids is easier on me. What in the world?

Don't worry, we're in the made-up-scenario land that is a frequent territory of DCUM posters.

[Anonymous]

I'm still waiting for legit, unbiased sources saying reshirting is beneficial to be posted in here. Because all I'm finding is saying the opposite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do some of you reconcile red shirting but then also taking advantage of the free prek3 and 4. They are either ready for all day school or not.

I am the pp poster above who regrets not redshirting. I didn't send my child to all day PK3. We chose a 1/2 day 3-day a week private program. We did send him to an all day PK4, but it was a play-based program. Wish now I would have kept him in it another year. How different the last three years would have been! And not just for my kid - for yours too. He has been rather disruptive in class. You non-redshirting parents, do you really want immature, disruptive summer birthday boys in your kids' classrooms?! My kid takes up A LOT of the teacher's time and attention both in term of behavior and academics.

But he was three years more mature and still being disruptive, so may be you are focusing on the wrong thing as a cause.

Maybe you should MYOB, because these kids are very complicated and it's not always clear what the right thing is, and parents do what they can to help, which may include redshirting.

Or, you can just go on bashing parents with struggling kids.

NP. I don't think that the PP was bashing parents with struggling kids at all. I actually feel that it's the opposite. I think she's saying that it sounds like there was an underlying reason for the disruptive behavior that doesn't have to do with "well you let your preschooler run wild and didn't parent him properly and that's why they weren't ready for school but in a year he'll hopefully settle down and it will be fine to start then". If after several years of formal schooling the child is still having behavioral or learning issues then I don't think people can claim that delaying school until they're physically older and bigger would help much. It's more of a case of "there's something else going on here, like maybe a medical issue, whether that's a simple thing like food allergies making them more hyperactive or something more serious, that isn't going to magically fix itself".

To the PP who regrets not redshirting, have you considered holding your child back now? Do you think it would make him less disruptive if the work is a bit easier and the expectations are a bit lower? If you think that, then maybe you should talk to the teachers and see whether they think the same. Maybe the teachers don't think you'd be open to it. Some kids do get held back when they're struggling academically, and if you really think it the lower grade would solve a lot of the issues then it's better to make a correction in third grade than to never do it and struggle all the way to grade 12.

PP here. I've stayed out of the ensuing discussion, but yes, we are talking to teachers about holding him back and about how to do so without making him feel like a failure. This is my biggest worry now. They do think that 1. his behavior is much more developmentally appropriate for a 1st grader than a 2nd grader and 2) some of his goofing off in class is because he can't do the work. In 1st grade he was reading at the K level and in second grade he is reading at a 1st grade level, so he is making progress. Had we redshirted, I imagine he would have always been on track and we'd not now be faced with how to get him in the appropriate grade without damaging his self esteem and having him label himself as not good at school.

My point for sharing this isn't to say that redshirting isn't sometimes a way for parents to try to game the system, and of course it is something to think through carefully, but sometimes sending a child to school on time can backfire. I have two summer birthday kids - one, an August birthday!, I never had a concern about staring K and all is well. The other I felt in my gut wasn't ready, but we dutifully sent him on time and are paying for it now.

[Anonymous]

I find it weird that parents on dcum will do a LOT for their children's education however some of the same people won't work with their kids to get them K ready and just wait an extra year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm still waiting for legit, unbiased sources saying reshirting is beneficial to be posted in here. Because all I'm finding is saying the opposite.

http://www.nber.org/papers/w24492

https://www.todaysparent.com/kids/school-age/redshirting-kids/

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0272775715302508

http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.3102/0162373714547268

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=3089772

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0094119016300444

https://ubir.buffalo.edu/xmlui/handle/10477/76171

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it weird that parents on dcum will do a LOT for their children's education however some of the same people won't work with their kids to get them K ready and just wait an extra year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I just spoke today to an admission director for a well known catholic school in DC. She told me that being a little older is always better than being younger. My DD will be turning 6 just as her K class starts. Do what is best for your child and don’t honk about anything and anybody else. All of these parents that are against redshirting are only thinking about their kids too (that perhaps are born in May or June or they decide not not redshirt). We all try to do what is best for our kids. Don’t let people on an anonymous board guilt you into doing otherwise because it suits THEIR children’s needs.

Or, you know, we are just following the guidelines.

So are the people who redshirt. Please tell me that you are honestly not thinking of your own child when you try to convince OP to not redshirt... convince me

I’m following “there has to be a cut off so listen to it unless you have a good reason and ‘my kid is not ready in my opinion’ isn’t a reason”

My kid turns 5 the day before the cut off so I’m practicing what I preach.

So you ARE thinking of your young child when you criticize people who redshirt. If you are happy with your child being the youngest, why do you care if I want my Dd to be the oldest?

[Anonymous]

Where did I say I was HAPPY?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it weird that parents on dcum will do a LOT for their children's education however some of the same people won't work with their kids to get them K ready and just wait an extra year.

Getting ready for K can mean sitting for long stretches of time silently, listening to prolonged instruction and having limited/hardly any free play. This isn’t what Kindergarten ever was and kids haven’t changed but K has. On the first day at our school kindergarteners were asked to write a sentence about their summer. I am sure lots of people will respond how their 4 year old loves writing sentences, but most kids can’t do that before K and they shouldn’t be. Kids felt confused and bad that they couldn’t do it. Not a great first experience to school.


https://www.washingtonpost.com/amphtml/news/answer-sheet/wp/2018/04/06/in-massachusetts-a-disturbing-trend-in-kindergarten/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where did I say I was HAPPY?

So why did you make such a bad decision for your child? Does this make you a better mother than me (I don’t think so)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do some of you reconcile red shirting but then also taking advantage of the free prek3 and 4. They are either ready for all day school or not.

I am the pp poster above who regrets not redshirting. I didn't send my child to all day PK3. We chose a 1/2 day 3-day a week private program. We did send him to an all day PK4, but it was a play-based program. Wish now I would have kept him in it another year. How different the last three years would have been! And not just for my kid - for yours too. He has been rather disruptive in class. You non-redshirting parents, do you really want immature, disruptive summer birthday boys in your kids' classrooms?! My kid takes up A LOT of the teacher's time and attention both in term of behavior and academics.

But he was three years more mature and still being disruptive, so may be you are focusing on the wrong thing as a cause.

Maybe you should MYOB, because these kids are very complicated and it's not always clear what the right thing is, and parents do what they can to help, which may include redshirting.

Or, you can just go on bashing parents with struggling kids.

NP. I don't think that the PP was bashing parents with struggling kids at all. I actually feel that it's the opposite. I think she's saying that it sounds like there was an underlying reason for the disruptive behavior that doesn't have to do with "well you let your preschooler run wild and didn't parent him properly and that's why they weren't ready for school but in a year he'll hopefully settle down and it will be fine to start then". If after several years of formal schooling the child is still having behavioral or learning issues then I don't think people can claim that delaying school until they're physically older and bigger would help much. It's more of a case of "there's something else going on here, like maybe a medical issue, whether that's a simple thing like food allergies making them more hyperactive or something more serious, that isn't going to magically fix itself".

To the PP who regrets not redshirting, have you considered holding your child back now? Do you think it would make him less disruptive if the work is a bit easier and the expectations are a bit lower? If you think that, then maybe you should talk to the teachers and see whether they think the same. Maybe the teachers don't think you'd be open to it. Some kids do get held back when they're struggling academically, and if you really think it the lower grade would solve a lot of the issues then it's better to make a correction in third grade than to never do it and struggle all the way to grade 12.

PP here. I've stayed out of the ensuing discussion, but yes, we are talking to teachers about holding him back and about how to do so without making him feel like a failure. This is my biggest worry now. They do think that 1. his behavior is much more developmentally appropriate for a 1st grader than a 2nd grader and 2) some of his goofing off in class is because he can't do the work. In 1st grade he was reading at the K level and in second grade he is reading at a 1st grade level, so he is making progress. Had we redshirted, I imagine he would have always been on track and we'd not now be faced with how to get him in the appropriate grade without damaging his self esteem and having him label himself as not good at school.

If you seriously think that he's getting all the support he needs and that everything would be basically resolved in the lower grade, you should switch him ASAP. There's a chance he'll get over it now and maybe even forget about it, but he's not going to get over it and he's certainly going to know that he's not good at school (and it would be true) if you keep him where he is. You could work on some outside activities (e.g. martial arts) to build up self esteem in the meantime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where did I say I was HAPPY?

So why did you make such a bad decision for your child? Does this make you a better mother than me (I don’t think so)

Of course it doesn't make her a better mother, but it does make her a better member of society.

I am actually really grateful that DC has public PK3 and PK4 because I think for many of us who have kids with August and September birthdays, it's a pretty low-risk way to start them on time and see how they do. If they are clearly unready or struggling or show that they need additional learning supports, 1) public school is an excellent place to get them and 2) the school and parents can decide that retention is a good option at K or 1st. I actually think that is a MUCH better outcome than redshirting, for both the kid in question and their peers of all ages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it weird that parents on dcum will do a LOT for their children's education however some of the same people won't work with their kids to get them K ready and just wait an extra year.

Getting ready for K can mean sitting for long stretches of time silently, listening to prolonged instruction and having limited/hardly any free play. This isn’t what Kindergarten ever was and kids haven’t changed but K has. On the first day at our school kindergarteners were asked to write a sentence about their summer. I am sure lots of people will respond how their 4 year old loves writing sentences, but most kids can’t do that before K and they shouldn’t be. Kids felt confused and bad that they couldn’t do it. Not a great first experience to school.


https://www.washingtonpost.com/amphtml/news/answer-sheet/wp/2018/04/06/in-massachusetts-a-disturbing-trend-in-kindergarten/

Yes, it was how K always was. You are idealizing it in your mind and preschools need to do a better job preparing kids as parents are not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do some of you reconcile red shirting but then also taking advantage of the free prek3 and 4. They are either ready for all day school or not.

I am the pp poster above who regrets not redshirting. I didn't send my child to all day PK3. We chose a 1/2 day 3-day a week private program. We did send him to an all day PK4, but it was a play-based program. Wish now I would have kept him in it another year. How different the last three years would have been! And not just for my kid - for yours too. He has been rather disruptive in class. You non-redshirting parents, do you really want immature, disruptive summer birthday boys in your kids' classrooms?! My kid takes up A LOT of the teacher's time and attention both in term of behavior and academics.

But he was three years more mature and still being disruptive, so may be you are focusing on the wrong thing as a cause.

Maybe you should MYOB, because these kids are very complicated and it's not always clear what the right thing is, and parents do what they can to help, which may include redshirting.

Or, you can just go on bashing parents with struggling kids.

NP. I don't think that the PP was bashing parents with struggling kids at all. I actually feel that it's the opposite. I think she's saying that it sounds like there was an underlying reason for the disruptive behavior that doesn't have to do with "well you let your preschooler run wild and didn't parent him properly and that's why they weren't ready for school but in a year he'll hopefully settle down and it will be fine to start then". If after several years of formal schooling the child is still having behavioral or learning issues then I don't think people can claim that delaying school until they're physically older and bigger would help much. It's more of a case of "there's something else going on here, like maybe a medical issue, whether that's a simple thing like food allergies making them more hyperactive or something more serious, that isn't going to magically fix itself".

To the PP who regrets not redshirting, have you considered holding your child back now? Do you think it would make him less disruptive if the work is a bit easier and the expectations are a bit lower? If you think that, then maybe you should talk to the teachers and see whether they think the same. Maybe the teachers don't think you'd be open to it. Some kids do get held back when they're struggling academically, and if you really think it the lower grade would solve a lot of the issues then it's better to make a correction in third grade than to never do it and struggle all the way to grade 12.

PP here. I've stayed out of the ensuing discussion, but yes, we are talking to teachers about holding him back and about how to do so without making him feel like a failure. This is my biggest worry now. They do think that 1. his behavior is much more developmentally appropriate for a 1st grader than a 2nd grader and 2) some of his goofing off in class is because he can't do the work. In 1st grade he was reading at the K level and in second grade he is reading at a 1st grade level, so he is making progress. Had we redshirted, I imagine he would have always been on track and we'd not now be faced with how to get him in the appropriate grade without damaging his self esteem and having him label himself as not good at school.

If you seriously think that he's getting all the support he needs and that everything would be basically resolved in the lower grade, you should switch him ASAP. There's a chance he'll get over it now and maybe even forget about it, but he's not going to get over it and he's certainly going to know that he's not good at school (and it would be true) if you keep him where he is. You could work on some outside activities (e.g. martial arts) to build up self esteem in the meantime.

Or, get him a reading tutor for the summer and heavily supplement to help him catch up.