does anyone else find the social scene at Janney hard to take?

[Anonymous]

Yes this is happening in a grade at janney this year and my child is one of the few that keeps not getting invited. Nice kid, gets along with everyone in school but weird controlling parent clique is literally hand picking kids to exclude

[Anonymous]

I once saw some "cool" Janney moms openly mocking a student with some social issues as they chaperoned a sports game. I'd never seen anything so harsh. Seems like there is a nasty element there.

[Anonymous]

Oh, yeah? I once saw Godzilla. You want to talk about nasty.

[Anonymous]

They were out in full force at their last day of school parties

[Anonymous]

Janney parent here. Definitely not in the "cool" crowd.

I think that OP's views are generally accurate, but there's still a large set/majority of relatively normal parents and their kids to interact with. The "in crowd", while gossipy and cliquish, is easy to ignore.

My main concern is that they seem to have an inordinate amount of sway with the principal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, Janney shm here who needs a gigolo please advise. Hubbie just isn't putting out anymore. Please give me some suggestions!

They have an auction for that.

Winning post of the thread.

ha ha ha ha ha

Joke aside. I cannot believe some of the stuff said in this thread. Crazy and disgusting that at a public school, things like these are happening.

I know many of the sleepover and principal for a day winners, but have not been fortunate enough to be invited. They are generally the most giving people at the school so I can't really resent them (but in my heart I do!). I've encouraged my daughter to try to become friends with a couple of these kids so that we might get invited to be in the sleepover group next year before she graduates. It's a good life skill too

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, Janney shm here who needs a gigolo please advise. Hubbie just isn't putting out anymore. Please give me some suggestions!

They have an auction for that.

Winning post of the thread.

ha ha ha ha ha

Joke aside. I cannot believe some of the stuff said in this thread. Crazy and disgusting that at a public school, things like these are happening.

I know many of the sleepover and principal for a day winners, but have not been fortunate enough to be invited. They are generally the most giving people at the school so I can't really resent them (but in my heart I do!). I've encouraged my daughter to try to become friends with a couple of these kids so that we might get invited to be in the sleepover group next year before she graduates. It's a good life skill too

OP here. This is EXACTLY what perpetuates the problem at Janney. You're not in the "in crowd" but you actually tell your kids to befriend kids based on their social status and not by who they organically are drawn to. Because you want your kids to be invited to the "cool" events (i.e. the sleepovers). And so the kids that your child actually likes find it harder to find true community because people like you would trade that in for a chance at getting in with the cool people. And so these other kids probably throw in the towel and decide to invest in people based on their status as well. And pretty soon very few genuine friendships are formed and you have the same 8 kids getting invited to everything.
This is exactly, exactly what I see played out at Janney. Again, not with everyone (there are many people who buck the trend) but this is precisely what my first post was about.

There you go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, Janney shm here who needs a gigolo please advise. Hubbie just isn't putting out anymore. Please give me some suggestions!

They have an auction for that.

Winning post of the thread.

ha ha ha ha ha

Joke aside. I cannot believe some of the stuff said in this thread. Crazy and disgusting that at a public school, things like these are happening.

I know many of the sleepover and principal for a day winners, but have not been fortunate enough to be invited. They are generally the most giving people at the school so I can't really resent them (but in my heart I do!). I've encouraged my daughter to try to become friends with a couple of these kids so that we might get invited to be in the sleepover group next year before she graduates. It's a good life skill too

OP here. This is EXACTLY what perpetuates the problem at Janney. You're not in the "in crowd" but you actually tell your kids to befriend kids based on their social status and not by who they organically are drawn to. Because you want your kids to be invited to the "cool" events (i.e. the sleepovers). And so the kids that your child actually likes find it harder to find true community because people like you would trade that in for a chance at getting in with the cool people. And so these other kids probably throw in the towel and decide to invest in people based on their status as well. And pretty soon very few genuine friendships are formed and you have the same 8 kids getting invited to everything.
This is exactly, exactly what I see played out at Janney. Again, not with everyone (there are many people who buck the trend) but this is precisely what my first post was about.

There you go.

OP, you are exactly right and please note PP's word choice: I've encouraged my DD to become friends with these kids so that WE might get invited to be in the sleepover group. Really, really pathetic, and very sad. Just proves your point that these moms are reliving their own glory days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, Janney shm here who needs a gigolo please advise. Hubbie just isn't putting out anymore. Please give me some suggestions!

They have an auction for that.

Winning post of the thread.

ha ha ha ha ha

Joke aside. I cannot believe some of the stuff said in this thread. Crazy and disgusting that at a public school, things like these are happening.

I know many of the sleepover and principal for a day winners, but have not been fortunate enough to be invited. They are generally the most giving people at the school so I can't really resent them (but in my heart I do!). I've encouraged my daughter to try to become friends with a couple of these kids so that we might get invited to be in the sleepover group next year before she graduates. It's a good life skill too

OP here. This is EXACTLY what perpetuates the problem at Janney. You're not in the "in crowd" but you actually tell your kids to befriend kids based on their social status and not by who they organically are drawn to. Because you want your kids to be invited to the "cool" events (i.e. the sleepovers). And so the kids that your child actually likes find it harder to find true community because people like you would trade that in for a chance at getting in with the cool people. And so these other kids probably throw in the towel and decide to invest in people based on their status as well. And pretty soon very few genuine friendships are formed and you have the same 8 kids getting invited to everything.
This is exactly, exactly what I see played out at Janney. Again, not with everyone (there are many people who buck the trend) but this is precisely what my first post was about.

There you go.

OP, you are exactly right and please note PP's word choice: I've encouraged my DD to become friends with these kids so that WE might get invited to be in the sleepover group. Really, really pathetic, and very sad. Just proves your point that these moms are reliving their own glory days.

Glad I'm not the only one that thinks so. Ick. How about we encourage our kids to think for themselves?

[Anonymous]

The "we" set aside... I read this differently. If the dd really has always wanted to go to the sleepover. The logical answer is to make friends with the people who always go. Perhaps while trying to create that friendship, she will realize she doesn't actually enjoy these other girls and is fine missing a sleepover with them. On the most basic level - it's a story that has been happening for generations " you're not invited to my birthday party... I'll invite you to the pool if, xyz". And as a parent - you see your kid feelimg left out - you try to fix it. I don't think it's a janney specific issue

[Anonymous]

This is just exhausting. Who cares?! It's your *kid's* school. Please get a hobby or come up with another method of meeting people. Stop pimping your children to obtain friends in the "cool" crowd. You are an adult now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Janney parent here. Definitely not in the "cool" crowd.

I think that OP's views are generally accurate, but there's still a large set/majority of relatively normal parents and their kids to interact with. The "in crowd", while gossipy and cliquish, is easy to ignore.

My main concern is that they seem to have an inordinate amount of sway with the principal.
I bet the principal has it up to here but what can she/he do!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is just exhausting. Who cares?! It's your *kid's* school. Please get a hobby or come up with another method of meeting people. Stop pimping your children to obtain friends in the "cool" crowd. You are an adult now.

I think what encourages this is that there is no bus service (so parents are physically present on campus daily) and the school has a 10 minute morning assembly EVERY DAY in the courtyard that all the parents attend. So you literally can see every parent in your child's class every day. So it quickly becomes your social scene as well as your child's. I often think that this contributes to the social craziness. It's meant to foster community but it also fosters cliques.
A little parental distance (which just about every other school on the planet has) would be much healthier.

[Anonymous]

This is why I think the sacrifices should be held at jamboree. You think it is an accident the Mayans held theirs at their version of jamboree. Parents need to know what the stakes are for trying through their children to be among the cool castes and failing.

[Anonymous]

I do believe Janney parents find it advantageous to get into the cool crowd because the cool crowd has a lot of sway with the principal. This is the problem when parents get too involved with the operations of the school rather than focusing on their own children.