Do your teens expect you to cook meals for them over the summer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t conflate feeding your children with misogyny.

This is a parental responsibility. Either parent. Those saying it’s not their job to feed their teens, do you at least buy all the food ingredients they need to feed themselves, or do you make them grocery shop too? Do they have to pay? Did you teach them how to cook nutritious and tasty foods or they just eat hot pockets? I’m so baffled by this whole thread.

I grocery shop. I taught them to prep simple things (eggs, sandwiches, spaghetti, burgers, salads) years ago. They have always been involved in making meals. And we usually have leftovers available from the nights that I do cook.

I don’t think it’s my responsibility to cook for my teenagers every day. If DH is working, my youngest is with a friend, and I’m not hungry or I’m just heating up leftovers, then my teens can make something for themselves. I don’t expect them to cook for the whole family, but they can fix themselves a meal.

Last night, DH and I took the kids who wanted to go to the pool, and we ordered pizza for dinner there. My 15 and 17 year old didn’t want to come, so they made themselves some grilled cheeses and salad at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We meal plan and shop on weekends and serve family dinners on weeknights. The summer schedule is a lot looser than the school year but the framework is still there. During summer we lean on things the kids can cook themselves or reheat if they are coming home late from work or hangouts..

So, this sounds like you don’t always cook meals for your teenagers over the summer….
I don’t get why people are baffled by this. (I also find it hard to believe that everyone on DCUM is really sitting down to a big family dinner every night, prepared by teens twice a week, like they live on a midwestern farm.)

[Anonymous]

I typically cook dinner for the family but DD, 13, is fully capable of making dinner for herself if I am running late or she does not like what we may be having that night. There are 3 grocery stores within 10 minutes or so of our house and so she can procure items if need be. We have ample fruits, vegetables, and other food, ie leftovers, eggs, dairy that she can eat but we do strive to and do generally eat dinner together most evenings.

[Anonymous]

Uh are they not your children July and august?

[Anonymous]

My 13 year old is going to have no camp for a week. I asked him today if he will make us dinner that week. He claims he would--but we'll see.

I would not expect a teenager to offer to cook, unprompted.

[Anonymous]

I cook dinner most days, but when I am working and they don’t have any activities, I am not stopping what I am doing to cook them food. At 14 and 15, they are perfectly capable of making themselves a square meal for breakfast or lunch.

[Anonymous]

I usually cook dinner for the whole family, because eating a meal together is important to me. But they are on their own for breakfast and lunch.

If DH and I are going to be out for an evening, we make sure the kitchen is stocked with things they can cook for themselves.

DC also cooks dinner with me sometimes, or is in charge of dinner for the family. That's great too, as long as we all eat together whenever we can.

[Anonymous]

I have been in serious dinner burn out coming into the summer. At first I said I wasn't cooking dinner at all, but I have realized I don't mind cooking so much as the meal planning. I set up a family Instacart cart for Aldi and Wegmans, the family puts in items they want for snacks and dinner. My only request is if you want me to cook dinner you need to put everything you want in the cart. It's been a life changer.

[Anonymous]

We are in Potomac, 2 professional working parents, 2 teens and yes we sit together everyday for dinner and eat as a family. No electronics or books at the dinner table.

DH or I cook but not everyday. I cook enough for 2 meals so we do leftovers maybe 2-3 nights a wk.

I’m shocked so many don’t eat dinner together as a family. Such a special time for us. I guess we all have different values.

[Anonymous]

Yes definitely cook for your children or have a dinner plan, even if they’re teens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are in Potomac, 2 professional working parents, 2 teens and yes we sit together everyday for dinner and eat as a family. No electronics or books at the dinner table.

DH or I cook but not everyday. I cook enough for 2 meals so we do leftovers maybe 2-3 nights a wk.

I’m shocked so many don’t eat dinner together as a family. Such a special time for us. I guess we all have different values.

Same. I take pride in creating family bonds and memories for my kids, regardless of their age.

[Anonymous]

It is my absolute pleasure to feed my kids delicious meals when they are home for summer. My kids will probably fend for themselves if they have to, but why would I let them do that? I ask them what they would like to eat and I make their favorite dishes throughout summer to pamper them.

[Anonymous]

Yes, cook dinner every night for our family and we sit down to eat it together. On Saturday or Sunday, I make a big breakfast for everyone. I have done this their whole lives, I am not stopping just because they are 16, 20 & 21. My older kids are home from college and I love making them all their favorite meals all summer. I find it off putting that people don’t cook for their kids if they themselves aren’t hungry or if they were at work all day. Bizarre.

[Anonymous]

Working mom whose love language is feeding. My SAHM always had fresh home-cooked food for us when we lived at home (through college!) and I really appreciate it. I prefer my own cooking now and I love to feed my kids whatever they request me to make. My 10 yr old son asks to learn how to cook so I'm teaching him too. If he has a burning desire to cook meals, I'll let him but it's my job (and DH's) to make sure our kids our fed until they are adults. It's only a few years - your 16 yr old is only a "burden" for 2 more years before they head off to college or wherever.

I get that some people hate cooking. Or taking care of others. Personally, I don't feel the same way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are in Potomac, 2 professional working parents, 2 teens and yes we sit together everyday for dinner and eat as a family. No electronics or books at the dinner table.

DH or I cook but not everyday. I cook enough for 2 meals so we do leftovers maybe 2-3 nights a wk.

I’m shocked so many don’t eat dinner together as a family. Such a special time for us. I guess we all have different values.

You sound like such a prig. You do know families can have ‘special time’ doing things other than eating, right?