Is marriage even worth it for women anymore?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, not worth it. You don't need a husband to have sex or children anymore. And most women end up working outside the home and doing more than 50/50 of work in the home. If you have a fantastic husband, then sure, it's great. But if you don't (and despite what you read on here, you don't always know and people change), then it is awful.

Right.

Great husband>no husband>average husband>crappy ex-husband>crappy husband.

Very true. Not sure where average goes in relation to none. Maybe if making good money tips the scales to left if None.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is not good for women, but probably good for children.

Men gains tons of advantages (as scientifically proven: they live longer, reduce their homemaking responsibilities, gain career advantages...not so for women).

Yeah, right, women gain no advantages from marriage. Remind me again who is obsessed with and constantly chasing marriage in their 20s and 30s – is it men or women? Strange that women would be obsessed with obtaining something that offers them no advantages – I guess you think women are just dumb.

I worked hard to find a spouse who I thought would be a good dad and husband. He had a brain injury and became an abusive alcoholic. I very much tried to marry and then mate well, because I think that an intact two parent family is ultimately the easiest best path for kids and healthy development. I didn’t get that, but you are right- I tried to.

Now, I’m divorced and to answer the question- for me now- no, marriage would no be worth it. I won’t have more children and religion wouldn’t play into wanting to marry (ie no scruples about out of wedlock sex). I won’t ever let anyone take half my stuff again and I know that when marriage can end so painfully and insanely it isn’t anything sacred or special- relationship is what is sacred and special. I’m sure I’ll enter into a committed monogamous relationship some day, but I will not marry again.

I guess my answer has changed over my lifetime due to my experiences. You seem really angry at women- are you?

I feel for you PP, but this is also a pretty rare situation, where a great guy turns into a bad one because of a random brain injury. That's not the fault of marriage as an institution.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is not good for women, but probably good for children.

Men gains tons of advantages (as scientifically proven: they live longer, reduce their homemaking responsibilities, gain career advantages...not so for women).

Yeah, right, women gain no advantages from marriage. Remind me again who is obsessed with and constantly chasing marriage in their 20s and 30s – is it men or women? Strange that women would be obsessed with obtaining something that offers them no advantages – I guess you think women are just dumb.

I worked hard to find a spouse who I thought would be a good dad and husband. He had a brain injury and became an abusive alcoholic. I very much tried to marry and then mate well, because I think that an intact two parent family is ultimately the easiest best path for kids and healthy development. I didn’t get that, but you are right- I tried to.

Now, I’m divorced and to answer the question- for me now- no, marriage would no be worth it. I won’t have more children and religion wouldn’t play into wanting to marry (ie no scruples about out of wedlock sex). I won’t ever let anyone take half my stuff again and I know that when marriage can end so painfully and insanely it isn’t anything sacred or special- relationship is what is sacred and special. I’m sure I’ll enter into a committed monogamous relationship some day, but I will not marry again.

I guess my answer has changed over my lifetime due to my experiences. You seem really angry at women- are you?

How is it half of “your stuff”? You went into marriage with a selfish mentality, ended it out of selfishness (no compassion for a man with a BRAIN INJURY?), and then somehow it’s *marriage’s* fault?

This is why I emphatically suggest people to just be alone. Being selfish in a “commited monogamous relationship” (marriage in so many words 🙄) won’t work either. The problem is YOU!! Stop trying to bring people into your tight-fisted, transactional, curmudgeonly existence just because you’re horny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is not good for women, but probably good for children.

Men gains tons of advantages (as scientifically proven: they live longer, reduce their homemaking responsibilities, gain career advantages...not so for women).

Yeah, right, women gain no advantages from marriage. Remind me again who is obsessed with and constantly chasing marriage in their 20s and 30s – is it men or women? Strange that women would be obsessed with obtaining something that offers them no advantages – I guess you think women are just dumb.

I worked hard to find a spouse who I thought would be a good dad and husband. He had a brain injury and became an abusive alcoholic. I very much tried to marry and then mate well, because I think that an intact two parent family is ultimately the easiest best path for kids and healthy development. I didn’t get that, but you are right- I tried to.

Now, I’m divorced and to answer the question- for me now- no, marriage would no be worth it. I won’t have more children and religion wouldn’t play into wanting to marry (ie no scruples about out of wedlock sex). I won’t ever let anyone take half my stuff again and I know that when marriage can end so painfully and insanely it isn’t anything sacred or special- relationship is what is sacred and special. I’m sure I’ll enter into a committed monogamous relationship some day, but I will not marry again.

I guess my answer has changed over my lifetime due to my experiences. You seem really angry at women- are you?

I feel for you PP, but this is also a pretty rare situation, where a great guy turns into a bad one because of a random brain injury. That's not the fault of marriage as an institution.

Same thing happened to me. It's not as rare as you think.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is not good for women, but probably good for children.

Men gains tons of advantages (as scientifically proven: they live longer, reduce their homemaking responsibilities, gain career advantages...not so for women).

Yeah, right, women gain no advantages from marriage. Remind me again who is obsessed with and constantly chasing marriage in their 20s and 30s – is it men or women? Strange that women would be obsessed with obtaining something that offers them no advantages – I guess you think women are just dumb.

I worked hard to find a spouse who I thought would be a good dad and husband. He had a brain injury and became an abusive alcoholic. I very much tried to marry and then mate well, because I think that an intact two parent family is ultimately the easiest best path for kids and healthy development. I didn’t get that, but you are right- I tried to.

Now, I’m divorced and to answer the question- for me now- no, marriage would no be worth it. I won’t have more children and religion wouldn’t play into wanting to marry (ie no scruples about out of wedlock sex). I won’t ever let anyone take half my stuff again and I know that when marriage can end so painfully and insanely it isn’t anything sacred or special- relationship is what is sacred and special. I’m sure I’ll enter into a committed monogamous relationship some day, but I will not marry again.

I guess my answer has changed over my lifetime due to my experiences. You seem really angry at women- are you?

How is it half of “your stuff”? You went into marriage with a selfish mentality, ended it out of selfishness (no compassion for a man with a BRAIN INJURY?), and then somehow it’s *marriage’s* fault?

This is why I emphatically suggest people to just be alone. Being selfish in a “commited monogamous relationship” (marriage in so many words 🙄) won’t work either. The problem is YOU!! Stop trying to bring people into your tight-fisted, transactional, curmudgeonly existence just because you’re horny.

I’m not that PP but you people who insist that mental illness and disability justify abusive behavior and that spouses should stay to be abused are truly sick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is not good for women, but probably good for children.

Men gains tons of advantages (as scientifically proven: they live longer, reduce their homemaking responsibilities, gain career advantages...not so for women).

Yeah, right, women gain no advantages from marriage. Remind me again who is obsessed with and constantly chasing marriage in their 20s and 30s – is it men or women? Strange that women would be obsessed with obtaining something that offers them no advantages – I guess you think women are just dumb.

I worked hard to find a spouse who I thought would be a good dad and husband. He had a brain injury and became an abusive alcoholic. I very much tried to marry and then mate well, because I think that an intact two parent family is ultimately the easiest best path for kids and healthy development. I didn’t get that, but you are right- I tried to.

Now, I’m divorced and to answer the question- for me now- no, marriage would no be worth it. I won’t have more children and religion wouldn’t play into wanting to marry (ie no scruples about out of wedlock sex). I won’t ever let anyone take half my stuff again and I know that when marriage can end so painfully and insanely it isn’t anything sacred or special- relationship is what is sacred and special. I’m sure I’ll enter into a committed monogamous relationship some day, but I will not marry again.

I guess my answer has changed over my lifetime due to my experiences. You seem really angry at women- are you?

How is it half of “your stuff”? You went into marriage with a selfish mentality, ended it out of selfishness (no compassion for a man with a BRAIN INJURY?), and then somehow it’s *marriage’s* fault?

This is why I emphatically suggest people to just be alone. Being selfish in a “commited monogamous relationship” (marriage in so many words 🙄) won’t work either. The problem is YOU!! Stop trying to bring people into your tight-fisted, transactional, curmudgeonly existence just because you’re horny.

I’m not that PP but you people who insist that mental illness and disability justify abusive behavior and that spouses should stay to be abused are truly sick.

By all means, separate yourself from the abuse. But mental illness and disability doesn’t make that person any less your husband. Just because you made up your own vows doesn’t mean that “in sickness and in health” is somehow less a part of the reality of what comes with the institution.

[Anonymous]

Geez what a sad thread. Twenty years married and more than worth it. My DH is my best friend and we have seen each other through thick and thin and still love to hang out and make each other laugh. Two teenagers. Happy family.

Also adding I am in a creative profession doing something I love but might never break $100k and marriage has given me financial stability I wouldn’t have on my own. ( In addition to a family and life partner).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is not good for women, but probably good for children.

Men gains tons of advantages (as scientifically proven: they live longer, reduce their homemaking responsibilities, gain career advantages...not so for women).

Yeah, right, women gain no advantages from marriage. Remind me again who is obsessed with and constantly chasing marriage in their 20s and 30s – is it men or women? Strange that women would be obsessed with obtaining something that offers them no advantages – I guess you think women are just dumb.

I worked hard to find a spouse who I thought would be a good dad and husband. He had a brain injury and became an abusive alcoholic. I very much tried to marry and then mate well, because I think that an intact two parent family is ultimately the easiest best path for kids and healthy development. I didn’t get that, but you are right- I tried to.

Now, I’m divorced and to answer the question- for me now- no, marriage would no be worth it. I won’t have more children and religion wouldn’t play into wanting to marry (ie no scruples about out of wedlock sex). I won’t ever let anyone take half my stuff again and I know that when marriage can end so painfully and insanely it isn’t anything sacred or special- relationship is what is sacred and special. I’m sure I’ll enter into a committed monogamous relationship some day, but I will not marry again.

I guess my answer has changed over my lifetime due to my experiences. You seem really angry at women- are you?

How is it half of “your stuff”? You went into marriage with a selfish mentality, ended it out of selfishness (no compassion for a man with a BRAIN INJURY?), and then somehow it’s *marriage’s* fault?

This is why I emphatically suggest people to just be alone. Being selfish in a “commited monogamous relationship” (marriage in so many words 🙄) won’t work either. The problem is YOU!! Stop trying to bring people into your tight-fisted, transactional, curmudgeonly existence just because you’re horny.

I’m not that PP but you people who insist that mental illness and disability justify abusive behavior and that spouses should stay to be abused are truly sick.

By all means, separate yourself from the abuse. But mental illness and disability doesn’t make that person any less your husband. Just because you made up your own vows doesn’t mean that “in sickness and in health” is somehow less a part of the reality of what comes with the institution.

A marriage license isn’t a suicide pact. If the other person crosses a line, he or she is demanding you to leave essentially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Geez what a sad thread. Twenty years married and more than worth it. My DH is my best friend and we have seen each other through thick and thin and still love to hang out and make each other laugh. Two teenagers. Happy family.

Also adding I am in a creative profession doing something I love but might never break $100k and marriage has given me financial stability I wouldn’t have on my own. ( In addition to a family and life partner).

My ex husband would have never let me do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez what a sad thread. Twenty years married and more than worth it. My DH is my best friend and we have seen each other through thick and thin and still love to hang out and make each other laugh. Two teenagers. Happy family.

Also adding I am in a creative profession doing something I love but might never break $100k and marriage has given me financial stability I wouldn’t have on my own. ( In addition to a family and life partner).

My ex husband would have never let me do that.

I am sorry. That’s sad. I hope you’re happier now.

[Anonymous]

Yeesh. For the married women responding here, I feel bad for your husbands (and somewhat you).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez what a sad thread. Twenty years married and more than worth it. My DH is my best friend and we have seen each other through thick and thin and still love to hang out and make each other laugh. Two teenagers. Happy family.

Also adding I am in a creative profession doing something I love but might never break $100k and marriage has given me financial stability I wouldn’t have on my own. ( In addition to a family and life partner).

My ex husband would have never let me do that.

I am sorry. That’s sad. I hope you’re happier now.

Not really. Marrying him ruined the trajectory of my life. I am glad I am not married but I am certainly not happier.

[Anonymous]

Likely more respect…..

Especially if she has children.

Believe it or not, there are still people in existence today that look down at women having children out of wedlock.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is not good for women, but probably good for children.

Men gains tons of advantages (as scientifically proven: they live longer, reduce their homemaking responsibilities, gain career advantages...not so for women).

Yeah, right, women gain no advantages from marriage. Remind me again who is obsessed with and constantly chasing marriage in their 20s and 30s – is it men or women? Strange that women would be obsessed with obtaining something that offers them no advantages – I guess you think women are just dumb.

I worked hard to find a spouse who I thought would be a good dad and husband. He had a brain injury and became an abusive alcoholic. I very much tried to marry and then mate well, because I think that an intact two parent family is ultimately the easiest best path for kids and healthy development. I didn’t get that, but you are right- I tried to.

Now, I’m divorced and to answer the question- for me now- no, marriage would no be worth it. I won’t have more children and religion wouldn’t play into wanting to marry (ie no scruples about out of wedlock sex). I won’t ever let anyone take half my stuff again and I know that when marriage can end so painfully and insanely it isn’t anything sacred or special- relationship is what is sacred and special. I’m sure I’ll enter into a committed monogamous relationship some day, but I will not marry again.

I guess my answer has changed over my lifetime due to my experiences. You seem really angry at women- are you?

How is it half of “your stuff”? You went into marriage with a selfish mentality, ended it out of selfishness (no compassion for a man with a BRAIN INJURY?), and then somehow it’s *marriage’s* fault?

This is why I emphatically suggest people to just be alone. Being selfish in a “commited monogamous relationship” (marriage in so many words 🙄) won’t work either. The problem is YOU!! Stop trying to bring people into your tight-fisted, transactional, curmudgeonly existence just because you’re horny.

I’m not that PP but you people who insist that mental illness and disability justify abusive behavior and that spouses should stay to be abused are truly sick.

By all means, separate yourself from the abuse. But mental illness and disability doesn’t make that person any less your husband. Just because you made up your own vows doesn’t mean that “in sickness and in health” is somehow less a part of the reality of what comes with the institution.

I am this PP. he served me with divorce papers. He left on a bender and no one saw him for three weeks, he’d emptied every bank account. But otherwise, okay with your interpretation of things that didn’t happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is not good for women, but probably good for children.

Men gains tons of advantages (as scientifically proven: they live longer, reduce their homemaking responsibilities, gain career advantages...not so for women).

Yeah, right, women gain no advantages from marriage. Remind me again who is obsessed with and constantly chasing marriage in their 20s and 30s – is it men or women? Strange that women would be obsessed with obtaining something that offers them no advantages – I guess you think women are just dumb.

I worked hard to find a spouse who I thought would be a good dad and husband. He had a brain injury and became an abusive alcoholic. I very much tried to marry and then mate well, because I think that an intact two parent family is ultimately the easiest best path for kids and healthy development. I didn’t get that, but you are right- I tried to.

Now, I’m divorced and to answer the question- for me now- no, marriage would no be worth it. I won’t have more children and religion wouldn’t play into wanting to marry (ie no scruples about out of wedlock sex). I won’t ever let anyone take half my stuff again and I know that when marriage can end so painfully and insanely it isn’t anything sacred or special- relationship is what is sacred and special. I’m sure I’ll enter into a committed monogamous relationship some day, but I will not marry again.

I guess my answer has changed over my lifetime due to my experiences. You seem really angry at women- are you?

I feel for you PP, but this is also a pretty rare situation, where a great guy turns into a bad one because of a random brain injury. That's not the fault of marriage as an institution.

Same thing happened to me. It's not as rare as you think.

Same thing is currently happening to many women who married professional athletes before CTE was known about.