Pissed at DH but want to get over it.

[Anonymous]

It wasn’t a huge thing, but he really triggered me. He knew he f’d up and apologized and I know I should get over it, but haven’t been able to. I want to because he’s going to be traveling all next week for work. Help me get over my anger please.

[Anonymous]

Sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sex.

I’m on my first day of period so really don’t want to. I normally don’t mind a few days into it, but first day is a mess for me.

[Anonymous]

Exercise. Run, walk, something to release the tension. Life is too short to not be able to move on WHEN YOU WANT TO.

When my DH and I were first married, we promised to not go to bed mad. We work hard to be true to that promise, even if it means grudgingly saying: I'm still mad, but I love you anyway. Which somehow releases the anger and defuses the situation.

[Anonymous]

Identify why this is such a problem right now. If you normally don't have a problem moving on, then something is different. Do you not feel like he was sincere? Do you feel like this is a systemic problem and DHnis always apologizing but never changing his behavior?

[Anonymous]

What was it? I can't comment without knowing that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What was it? I can't comment without knowing that.

This. Maybe you’re actually right to stay mad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It wasn’t a huge thing, but he really triggered me. He knew he f’d up and apologized and I know I should get over it, but haven’t been able to. I want to because he’s going to be traveling all next week for work. Help me get over my anger please.

Punish him. Slap him in the face. You’ll feel better.

[Anonymous]

Read some world news. Perspective helps me get over things quicker. War, people dying, etc. Makes the little things not as big

[Anonymous]

OP, in order to formulate an appropriate response - could you add a little more context plz??

[Anonymous]

What did he do?

[Anonymous]

Exercise-even if you only have time for a 10 min try to get your heart rate up, take a shower, I bet you will feel somewhat better by the time your hair is dry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It wasn’t a huge thing, but he really triggered me. He knew he f’d up and apologized and I know I should get over it, but haven’t been able to. I want to because he’s going to be traveling all next week for work. Help me get over my anger please.

Do you feel like his apology was genuine? It would make it hard for me to get over something if I didn't feel that way.

Is there something else that you don't want to admit that you're upset with him about or don't like about him? Sometimes I find that we can have misplaced emotions and figuring out their real source is helpful (although it can be hard).

Can you plan an activity for the two of you like dinner or a date night or even just watching a TV show together that can help you remember what you love about him?

Spend 10 minutes writing down or just reflecting on memories - things he's done for you, why you love him, fun times you had together, etc.

Also, why do you think you "should" get over it? I feel like people are told that sometimes and it's just not true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Exercise. Run, walk, something to release the tension. Life is too short to not be able to move on WHEN YOU WANT TO.

When my DH and I were first married, we promised to not go to bed mad. We work hard to be true to that promise, even if it means grudgingly saying: I'm still mad, but I love you anyway. Which somehow releases the anger and defuses the situation.

+1

We've never gone to bed mad.

[Anonymous]

Why did it trigger you?

Did he actually do something wrong or was the wrong thing that it triggered you?

He isn't responsible for your feelings nor you for his. Also you are just starting your period which can amplify emotions.

Is he also easily triggered and you apologize to him for anytime he feels triggered by something you say or do?