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I am an immigrant and I called my parents-in-law the same honorific titles in my native language that I used for my parents.
What do your DIL, SIL call you. or what do you call your ILs? |
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My in laws have me call them by their first name. It took me awhile to get used to it, but I'm old now so doesn't bother me as much!
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| Grandma (same thing grandchildren call me) |
Awww - this is so sweet. I can live with that. But, if they do not have kids yet...? |
Before kids my DIL called me what my son calls me: Mommy. She calls her own mother Mom or Maman. |
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My DS's long- time girlfriend calls DH and me by our first names. DH calls my parents by their first names, as I did his parents when they were still alive.
If a DIL or SIL wanted to call me "mom" that would be OK with me, but my preference is my first name, as I am not their mother. I definitely do not want them to call me Grandma, good lord. |
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DIL here and first name still feels a little awkward but last name far too formal, so honestly I just try to avoid directly calling them anything to their face.
Definitely would never dream of callling them mom/dad (or similar nickname equivalent) |
| I call them by their names |
| I call my in-laws Mr and Mrs X. They are in their 80s. They have never invited me to call them something different in 21 years. While it is formalistic, it doesn’t bother me. I know they love me. |
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Mom/Dad
I called my own parents, Mom/mommy and daddy until they died. |
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I call them by their first names. MIL asked me to call her mom but I just couldn’t. It just felt strange to me. I do like them though. I write mom on all cards to her because they’re from both dh and I. My parents called their MIL and FIL by their first names and they married in the 70s.
My grandma called her in-laws “Mr and Mrs”. I think it was a power thing because they were richer than her family. She married in the 40s. |
| "Grndpa" when the grand kids are around. Otherwise calls me by my first name. |
| My SIL calls me Gamma, like my granddaughters. My DH and I call our respective IL's by their first names |
| My in-laws tried to get me to call them Mom or Dad when we first got married. I’m not doing that. So when I was younger I avoided calling them anything, once we had kids would occasionally use grandma/grandpa, and now that I’m perimenopausal and have zero effs left I call them by their first names. DH and I are the only ones of their three children that are nice to them or do anything for them. |
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They avoid calling me anything. Just like I did, with my in-laws. There's lots of love there. But it's awkward, the issue of what to call the in-laws. Certainly not Mom & Dad. But first names don't sound right either.
I called the in-laws by their first name but only when it was truly essential to address them. |