Should I wait about 10 years?

[Anonymous]

My youngest is 4, should I wait about 10 years before seriously entertaining dating? I've been divorced for one year and turn 40 this year. My best friend told me most men aren't seriously interested in women with young children.

[Anonymous]

You don't need "most men" you just need one.

[Anonymous]

10 years? Why wait so long?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You don't need "most men" you just need one.

Yes, good point.

[Anonymous]

What makes your best friend an expert on what men want?

[Anonymous]

No. Just introduce children slowly and only to very serious partners. I've seen a lot of very happy 2nd marriages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:10 years? Why wait so long?

Just thinking generally. Could be a couple of years less. It'd put my youngest at a much older age and all of my children (I have 3) would be more independent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What makes your best friend an expert on what men want?

I kind of chuckled at this. She's not. She's just been dating for longer so I see her as having more experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What makes your best friend an expert on what men want?

Who cares what men want? By 40, you should have learned to put yourself first in dating. Focus on what you want, whether he makes your life better, etc. If he doesn't want you, fine. But your perspective on dating should be whether he meets your needs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. Just introduce children slowly and only to very serious partners. I've seen a lot of very happy 2nd marriages.

Thank you. That's encouraging. I would only introduce them to anyone I knew for certain wanted to seriously commit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What makes your best friend an expert on what men want?

Who cares what men want? By 40, you should have learned to put yourself first in dating. Focus on what you want, whether he makes your life better, etc. If he doesn't want you, fine. But your perspective on dating should be whether he meets your needs.

Another good point.

[Anonymous]

My friend ended her engagement with her son's father while she was pregnant. She met her now-husband and started dating him when her son was 9 months old. They got married when he was 2 years old. They have been married for 9 years now, and she has had 3 additional kids with him.

I don't know what the norm is, but waiting 10 years seems ridiculous. Date whenever you feel ready, whether that's now, a year from now, or 5 years from now. I think this is a very individual thing.

[Anonymous]

I think a preschooler will be less of a problem than a teen when you bring someone new around

[Anonymous]

No, it's better to do this young. Teenagers will really hate being forced to "blend".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My youngest is 4, should I wait about 10 years before seriously entertaining dating? I've been divorced for one year and turn 40 this year. My best friend told me most men aren't seriously interested in women with young children.

How stupid