Redshirt another year of HS. How best to handle?

[Anonymous]

Tough year in HS and my DD is struggling, she doesn’t want to finish school year and yet only 2 months left. She’s August bday so young for her grade-any recommendations on how we can give another year of Hs or wait until graduation and then do a pg year. Her anxiety is so bad and we are in treatment but wondering if there’s a suggestion that might be out there. No drugs or behavioral concerns, anxiety, i sense depression as well.

[Anonymous]

It’s a mess dealing with issues like this. The only way to do is by switching schools. If you’re in a public school switch to private.

[Anonymous]

I think PP is right that if you switch from public to private you might be able to do this, but not the other way around. Also, there is a lot of time in school schedules that isn’t necessary to complete all of the requirements. You maybe can get a reduced schedule with only required classes. This is how we got my son through high school during his mental health crises years. Your school counselor should be able to help with this.

[Anonymous]

The trouble is switching schools while the kid’s mental health is tenuous is also risky.

The gap year is a great idea, but won’t help immediately.

[Anonymous]

I have been in this situation and honestly, I would not worry about school and focus on treatment. Maybe she needs a higher level of care - PHP or residential treatment. You can figure out how to move forward with school when she is in a better place. There are lots of non-traditional options - Fusion, other private, GED, homeschool program, community college/dual enrollment. Is she in public now? See what they are willing to do with the rest of the school year - give her the credits, do incompletes, home instruction. For some kids, the full long day of high school is too much. You can adjust the intensity with some of these options.

[Anonymous]

What grade is she in now?

[Anonymous]

What do you mean by "redshirt" ?

Repeat a grade?

Take a year off from school after 10th and come back and do 12th?

If she's academically on target but can't handle school environment, then homeschool/unschool/online school plus some group lessons to prepare for reintegration.


If you have an IEP or can get one, you can push for half day at public school plus online courses or one of the community college options if she's qualified.

[Anonymous]

Let her stop school now - focus on her health. Does she need residential treatment? Worry about next year in August. Do not let those worries distract from addressing current issues. That is most important

[Anonymous]

Don't redshirt. Redshirting in and of itself doesn't address the issue. If she doesn't want to go to school, why would making her do an extra year of school help? What is the specific issue with why she doesn't want to go to school -- boredom? social anxiety? problem teachers? falling behind? -- address those.

If she has anxiety, she should have a 504 plan at a minimum, possibly could qualify for an IEP depending on whether she is having any trouble with the academic material.

You say she is "in treatment" -- what does that mean? Is she doing therapy? For many people with anxiety and/or depression, therapy alone is not enough. Please see a psychiatrist and consider medication. Many people need medication - sometimes for a short while to get into a better place so they can use therapeutic techniques, but others need it for longer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you mean by "redshirt" ?

Repeat a grade?

Take a year off from school after 10th and come back and do 12th?

If she's academically on target but can't handle school environment, then homeschool/unschool/online school plus some group lessons to prepare for reintegration.


If you have an IEP or can get one, you can push for half day at public school plus online courses or one of the community college options if she's qualified.

You do not need an IEP to get accommodations for health issues in school -- you can get a 504 plan. My kid had serious depression one year and our 504 plan included hand-scheduling of classes so we could get an optimal order and some teacher preferences. We cut back on the number of classes by asking if she could be a TA for a favorite teacher - one who would let her be out sick with a sick note and not hassle her. When she was there, she could be a help. She also had accommodations like extra time, extended and rescheduled deadlines, etc. At one point when she was really struggling, we asked to cut the work down in a core class - algebra -- so that she could just take the tests and quizzes. It was a fight that we won. But, we also used the public school Home and Hospital program for a couple classes.

[Anonymous]

Thanks all. Op here. We are in private school which further complicates this. The cost of tuition plus now cost for intensive therapy feels overwhelming but needs to happen. I appreciate replies.

[Anonymous]

Do not hold her back. Hire tutors and get her through the year and if she’s unhappy switch her to public.

[Anonymous]

OP some kids go to Fusion for a year, and then return to their schools. Some kids change schools and repeat a year. Some kids stay on track but "downshift" to a school with less pressure.

Is your DD avoiding school or is her attendance ok?

[Anonymous]

I think you are prioritizing school at the expense of mental health treatment. Everyone I know who has dealt with this seems to regret it later. Because they need to ultimately pull them from school for more intense/residential treatment and they always wish they had just pulled the trigger on this sooner.

Public school will be just fine once she gets her mental health under control. Decide to focus on mental health only and then decide what to do.

[Anonymous]

Could transfer to public school and finish the year on home / hospital instruction which is online. Minimal work, but she could get credit for this year.