How to manage - nanny shoes no interest in helping to potty train

[Anonymous]

I am looking for some insights from experienced parents here.

My toddler is going to PK3 in August and we are making zero progress with potty training. We attempted a few times and took a break assuming DC is not ready. Now the clock is ticking.

On weekends we are available however I notice our nanny doesn't follow through if we ask her to take our son to potty. She will remember for a day and then stop. I am not sure how to communicate with her that she needs to help us as during the day we both are at work.

Am I expecting too much?

Please help me get some help.

[Anonymous]

No, you're not expecting too much. This is a requirement of the job.

You need to tell her in no uncertain terms that she must follow this protocol, 1, 2, 3, 4. Every single day. Spell it out for her. Acknowledge that it may change her preferred routines and other nanny interactions, but this is not negotiable. Even if success seems slow, it is the process that must be followed.

One day, it will click for your DC, but only because all of the weeks of consistency leading up to that day.

[Anonymous]

Agree with the PP. You've got to insist.

Just to make you feel better, in March before PK3, my son was nowhere near potty trained, despite many attempts. It finally clicked in about May or June, and he has literally never had an accident at school. You've got more time then you think, in toddler years.

I'll also add that for my stubborn, immature kid, the only thing that worked was to completely take away all bottoms. No pants, underwear, diapers (except at bedtime). He was so mad and hated it so much and it worked. I didn't let him have underwear for like two full months after, ha.

[Anonymous]

Can you start with a 3-day weekend? And tell the nanny no more diapers except bedtime?

[Anonymous]

Hide the diapers from her so she has no choice but to remember.

[Anonymous]

Have you asked her why she isn’t doing it?

My son became so anxious about the potty that he became constipated, and it became a serious problem. We had to back off until just a few weeks before school, when it finally clicked. Just wondering if your nanny has seen something similar with your child and is trying to slow things down.

[Anonymous]

What stage is your child at? Are you expecting nanny to potty train them or are they already in pull ups or undies and just need to be taken every 30 minutes to try?

We did the training in a weekend and when Monday came around sent her off to daycare in pull-ups and a few weeks later in undies.

Nanny either takes them to the potty or gets to change them.

[Anonymous]

I mean keep trying but my kid's PK3 (DCPS) teacher said she deals with this all the time. She had our kid potty trained in two weeks tops...so I wouldn't worry about it all too much.

[Anonymous]

you have until the fall. I would ease up. I would make sure you are offering the bathroom and look for cues that your kid is interested. we thought our kid was ready and sent him to day care, after 2 accidents, day care was understandably done. a few months later and before preschool, we were good to go.

[Anonymous]

Definitely not expecting too much. I’m actually surprised a nanny would let him get to 3 without potty training. It’s usually one of their skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I mean keep trying but my kid's PK3 (DCPS) teacher said she deals with this all the time. She had our kid potty trained in two weeks tops...so I wouldn't worry about it all too much.

That is not the teachers job! It is a nanny’s job though.

[Anonymous]

Start on a Saturday, no diapers or pull-ups while awake. Plan on being home all weekend. Lots of juice and rewards for using the potty.
Keep going on Sunday. Tell the Nanny ahead of time she should plan on staying in Monday and Tuesday and continuing. Child should not be put in diapers when awake anymore. Make that very clear

[Anonymous]

Need to just do the boot camp over a weekend (take a day or two off work if needed) and get rid of the diapers!!
Make a chart for her to mark off if he went or not. If nanny isn’t experienced in this department, highly suggest having you take the lead and take time off work until he is successfully going.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Need to just do the boot camp over a weekend (take a day or two off work if needed) and get rid of the diapers!!
Make a chart for her to mark off if he went or not. If nanny isn’t experienced in this department, highly suggest having you take the lead and take time off work until he is successfully going.

Op here, we tried the weekend boot camp and it didn't with. He shows no interest in seating on the potty and refuses. We are pulling hair. We tried underwear and he is happy to sit on his underpants with shit in it.

This is our third attempt in 6 months and hoping now that he is almost three it might click 🤞

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Need to just do the boot camp over a weekend (take a day or two off work if needed) and get rid of the diapers!!
Make a chart for her to mark off if he went or not. If nanny isn’t experienced in this department, highly suggest having you take the lead and take time off work until he is successfully going.

Op here, we tried the weekend boot camp and it didn't with. He shows no interest in seating on the potty and refuses. We are pulling hair. We tried underwear and he is happy to sit on his underpants with shit in it.

This is our third attempt in 6 months and hoping now that he is almost three it might click 🤞

You can’t potty train him yet then. Underwear is what’s required here.