Lack of motivation towards anytime of fitness.
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Anonymous
| DS is about to be 13 towards the end of the year. Not only is he diagnosed with ADHD, high function Autism, Level 1, but also a lot of anxiety. Very much into his screen time and has gain a lot of weight last few months. very opposed to trying any sport because I feel like at his age a lot of the boys have already gain fundamentals of the sport or are just too competitive for his liking. He rather be with us. Need recommendations outside of group typical classes? Is there small sport classes or 1 on 1 stuff that can get him to excel in his overall gross motor skills? Maybe to even just get him out the house and move but also know how to deal with like the fine line of pushing him that he doesn't get him to quit. Am I asking for too much? Great kid, I just know he tends to go into a shell if things aren't met to his standards or overwhelmed. |
Anonymous
| This isn’t getting him out of the house but we set up a treadmill so that our kids had to walk in it to increase their allotted screen time. |
Anonymous
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Can he swim? We did the twice a week swimming at Tuckahoe on Thursday and Sunday evenings (this was a while ago, it may have changed). There may be a pool near you that has organized lap swims or some of the teams may have a low grade program.
Is there a dog he could walk? Can the family go on an after dinner walk every night? Is walking to and from school a possibility? |
Anonymous
Or walk on it while they are doing screen time - if you think it's safe. TBH, walking while reading or watching TV is the only thing that can get me on the treadmill, even as an adult. |
Anonymous
| Focus on individual exercise like walking, swimming, biking. You could see if he's interested in joining a gym with you. Team sports likely wont be the answer at that age. |
Anonymous
I would be a bit cautious about focusing on weight in a 13 year old. It is very common for kids to plump up a bit before they have a height growth spurt, and at age 13, he is probably still in his growth spurt. That said, exercise is an important daily/weekly habit for health, which is more than weight (cholesterol, blood pressure, glucose, etc.). If he has ADHD, exercise has to be something that is interesting to him -- a game, a sport he likes, something with self-challenge, not something with a team of boys that are more skilled than him both athletically and socially. Rock climbing? Swimming at the pool in the summer? Tennis or pickleball? gymnastics? fencing? skating? skiing? give him options of stuff to try with the understanding that he doesn't have to be good at it or after a 6 or 8 week session he can quit if he decides he doesn't like it. I also think it's OK to have a core set of social sports you, as a parent, want your kids to be good at -- which will vary depending on your social class and geographic region. In DC, tennis, basketball and soccer are "social sports" - at all ages. Are you and his Dad modeling regular exercise? Do you have outings on the weekend where you hike or walk or do other sports? It's easier to get kids to exercise if it's not a "do as I say, not as I do" situation. |
Anonymous
| My DD has ADHD and HFA and also likes to rot in bed playing video games. She started taking classes at a boxing gym (one of those cardio places with heavy bags) and she does strength training with me in the basement. She's noticed that she's pretty happy and chill after boxing class, so she doesn't fight us about going twice a week (sometimes three times). As an ADHD kid, I think she likes the sensation of hitting something. And because she's on her own bag, and everyone else is focusing on their bag, it doesn't feel competitive. Same with lifting weights in the basement with me. |
Anonymous
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You just described all of us in the family, OP. Autism usually comes with some level of attention issues and anxiety baked-in, BTW.
My husband forces himself into a few minutes of tai chi every day and loves to garden, so in the nicer months he gets a workout that way. I just walk the dog, even though I've exercised more in my life and I'm always promising myself to start again. As a teen, I boxed a little with a punching bag and got out some frustration that way, like a PP's kid. My college kid walks on the treadmill at his wellness center on campus, so not great, but better than nothing - when he was younger, he loved to jump on the trampoline, and he brings it out again every time he returns (trampoline is a very popular form of stimming for autistic kids, so maybe try that first). My daughter, thanks to her love of horses, is OK with horse back riding, but no other form of exercise... so we pay a ton for horseback riding lessons. None of us receive the vaunted endorphins that other people do. We just get sweaty and irritated, so exercise is Really. Not. Fun. I've been looking into an adult beginner's ballet class, just because I like classical music 
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Anonymous
| Some kids do well with horseback riding. He may qualify for adaptive horseback riding. You can try to get in the habit of walking or doing easy hikes as a family or swimming. When it gets warm, try kayaking or canoeing. Team sports may not be his thing, but there are lots of ways to move. For this kind of kid, building it into the family schedule works best. |
Anonymous
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+1 here.
None of us love to exercise and DS14 has some similar problems. But he is so rail thin that he really just doesn't have any fat or muscle on him at all. Easy kid for a bully to pick on being such a shrimp. Not many solutions from me but more empathizing. However, I agree with what everyone else is saying: build it into the family schedule, maybe buy something he can do at home, try low key workout classes that are more individually based. DS runs on track and cross country teams at school but doesn't participate in the meets. He does the same with the local swim team in the summer. He does some rowing in winter on our rowing machine but has needed a lot of encouragement. He will go for walks/hikes with us in nature (Rock Creek Park) and really seems to respond positively to that experience. He has walked to school for a few years which has been helpful. We also have not pushed him to get into a sport that other kids already play well. We tried that it and it backfired. Random classes like Parkour and Boxing are stuff that fewer people have prior experience with and can be more individual.
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Anonymous
| Maybe try Fitness for Health in Rockville, sounds like your son would be a good fit for their services. They have adaptive fitness sessions which is 1:1 with a trainer and teaches a lot of fundamentals and they have a lot of fun games and equipment there. |
Anonymous
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I agree with the PPs-team sports may not be the best option. My 11yo has and has had zero interest in team sports.
I think something like swimming, biking, running, or the gym is a good idea. My 11 yo likes swimming (not on a team) and the trampoline. Working on learning to ride a bike, and wants to try ice skating. |
Anonymous
| Spirit Club, Open Door Sports, SO kids Soar, Sports Plus. |
Anonymous
| Just be active as a family together. Use weekends for walks, bike rides, canoeing, hiking, whatever tickles you. You might dip a toe into dance by following online videos together. If adventure sports might be interesting, sign up for an indoor rock climbing class. I’ve even known a family who successfully got their teens to go with them to the sports club after dinner time. A lot of kids (and adults too) don’t love organized sports but discover a love of movement. |
Anonymous
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You could try indoor rock climbing - you rent an instructor for a few hours and everyone is a beginner. You can do it with him! They are nice and not competitive at all.
You can get really into it but it can also be super casual and it has low barriers to entry (other than cost). |