Teen throws things in his room due to no access to phone
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Anonymous
| Wwyd? He is 15… he was sent to his room (grounded till lunch time) due to disrespectful behavior (cursing at both parents, yelling)… now, he is throwing things at his room to the floor… |
Anonymous
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I would leave him alone for now. Ignore the tantrum.
Then later make him clean it up and replace any broken items. Calmly. He is probably going through withdrawal so I would be kind but firm. And keep the phone longer than planned (or only give it a super locked down). |
Anonymous
| I’d give up because what do you mean he was cussing at you, so he got grounded TIL LUNCH, and he can’t even handle what is basically time out for like 2 hours without losing his mind. Not even sure what you do with a kid like this. |
Anonymous
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He should lose access to those things.
Take the door of his room off its hinges if he slams it. |
Anonymous
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Ignore the tantrum. Add cleaning up his room and belongings to the condition of getting his phone back.
No discussion. |
Anonymous
I would need more context to have an answer. My first question is whether the throwing things is destructive, and if so whose property is it destructive to. Throwing things that damage walls, or that create damage (like something made of glass), or that don't belong to him (like the furniture) is different than slamming his own belongings to the floor, so I'd respond differently. The other thing is that clearly there is a significant amount of disregulation here, and this kid needs professional help. For many kids with this level of disregulation, the fact that he accepted the consequence and went to his room, rather than running out of the house, and that he turned his aggressive impulses towards objects, rather than people, is a huge win. Maybe that's your situation, maybe it isn't, but knowing whether you think there's potential for behavior that is far less safe than throwing things to the floor in the safety of his room, would make a difference in my response. Having said all of that, my first advice is to wait until he is totally regulated to deal with this. Increasing the level of disregulation by engaging now is definitely a mistake. |
Anonymous
+1000 He sounds very spoiled. Now unspoil him. Take the things away until he behaves. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
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Until lunch? Come on.
But this is what you said, so you have to live with it. Next time, it’s all day. And then 3 days. There’s no arguing or one more chance or “I told you not to do that.” The phone will simply be gone. He cleans everything up. Apologizes. Then he can have phone back. No discussion. |
Anonymous
This, but no phone back. He’s clearly not mature enough to have it. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| If he wants to have a tantrum like a toddler, treat him like one. |
Anonymous
Is this the first time he has engaged in either of these behaviors (the cursing/yelling and the throwing)? |
Anonymous
BTDT and agree this is very much like going through withdrawal. He needs time to detox without his phone. Maybe a lot of time. |