Affair

[Anonymous]

Would you stay with a sport coach/teacher who is having an affair with one of his students? We’re talking adults here so nothing illegal, per se. Just cheating against spouses. Some other students know about it as well and have mentioned it’s awkward when “she” comes to a class.

[Anonymous]

If it's an 18 year old, or an undergrad with a college coach, that's still an abuse of power by the coach and you should alert the high school or college.

What you're missing is that this isn't just about statutory rape. It's about possible coercion and sexual favors in exchange for advancement in the sport. That is usually not allowed by sports organizations.

Please report.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, the power differential is what matters here. If it’s a team of adults, being coached by another adult, there isn’t a power differential. The coach is just someone who helps the team members have organized practices and competitions. Same for a class you are taking out a gym where the person leading the workouts might be called a coach, but isn’t the same thing as a coach for a youth or school sports team where the coach has explicitly been placed in a position of power over the athletes.

If this is the kind of situation you are talking about, I think it’s up to you to decide how you feel about it and whether you want to be around that person/if you respect them. A similar situation happened with an instructor at my old gym. People found out about it and definitely had opinions. I liked the instructor, but it did make me think differently of them. I didn’t quit the gym for that reason, but it definitely had a different perception of the instructor once I found out. And yes, it’s really awkward when the affair partner comes to that instructor’s class.

[Anonymous]

why is "she" in quotations

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, the power differential is what matters here. If it’s a team of adults, being coached by another adult, there isn’t a power differential. The coach is just someone who helps the team members have organized practices and competitions. Same for a class you are taking out a gym where the person leading the workouts might be called a coach, but isn’t the same thing as a coach for a youth or school sports team where the coach has explicitly been placed in a position of power over the athletes.

If this is the kind of situation you are talking about, I think it’s up to you to decide how you feel about it and whether you want to be around that person/if you respect them. A similar situation happened with an instructor at my old gym. People found out about it and definitely had opinions. I liked the instructor, but it did make me think differently of them. I didn’t quit the gym for that reason, but it definitely had a different perception of the instructor once I found out. And yes, it’s really awkward when the affair partner comes to that instructor’s class.

Yes! This is it exactly. This is not at a gym but something similar where it makes me think I may want to change teachers.

[Anonymous]

Safesport still considers this a violation due to the inherent power imbalance.

[Anonymous]

Don’t leave but report it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Would you stay with a sport coach/teacher who is having an affair with one of his students? We’re talking adults here so nothing illegal, per se. Just cheating against spouses. Some other students know about it as well and have mentioned it’s awkward when “she” comes to a class.

"She" as in the wife of the coach? Or the student he is having an affair with? If the former, I would leave the group because that's too much. If the latter, just ignore it. If you never actually have to meet these people's spouses, what is so awkward?

[Anonymous]

Best thing to do is mind your own business

[Anonymous]

If I liked them as a coach and the location worked for me I wouldn’t leave.
I also wouldn’t report. They are all adults. ( basing this on your response to the gym example above)
The

[Anonymous]

Meh. Consenting adults, get over it.

[Anonymous]

If they consent to the cheating, they consent to getting caught. Let the wife know, OP. You'd want to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they consent to the cheating, they consent to getting caught. Let the wife know, OP. You'd want to know.

Anonymously only. Tell the wife when and where to show up to see for herself. If she doesn't act on the tip, drop it and move on with your life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they consent to the cheating, they consent to getting caught. Let the wife know, OP. You'd want to know.

Anonymously only. Tell the wife when and where to show up to see for herself. If she doesn't act on the tip, drop it and move on with your life.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they consent to the cheating, they consent to getting caught. Let the wife know, OP. You'd want to know.

Anonymously only. Tell the wife when and where to show up to see for herself. If she doesn't act on the tip, drop it and move on with your life.

No. Mind your business.