He wants to meet but we hardly talk

Anonymous
So this is long distance and I'm not sure why he wants to meet me if his curiosity in me is so low but he wants to meet me while he's here for work reasons and he coordinated stuff that's paid for by his job before coming here so he can meet me. But I don't get why because his curiosity is low in me. He doesn't ask how my day went. We don't talk daily and I don't feel that connected to him because we don't talk enough. We also don't really talk about sex but he is attracted to me that I know of but I'm still put off by his lack of curiosity and then he talks about us meeting and if it's great I could go see his family etc. but his lack of curiosity kind of puts me off. Now I'm not sure if I should meet him though we have stayed in contact for about 2 years long distance. But I think he gave me an ultimatum. Like if we don't meet this time then things are probably not going to work. So I don't know.
Anonymous
My ex and his entire family have no curiosity about the lives of other people. I would venture to say the men in the family have no interest in even each other's lives. They love to socialize and party and talk, but simply have no interest in the other person.

It used to bother me but I see it is something about their nature and maybe nurture.
If it bothers you, he is not right for you and move on. But I would not take it personally. Sometimes it is just baked into their personality.
Anonymous
Have you never met him before?

Been texting for 2 years?

I would have low expectations.
Anonymous
You don’t like this guy’s communication style and it seems he thinks you are leading him on.

You’re just not into him. Move on.
Anonymous
No I've never met him before and we have been texting and talking on the phone and I wouldn't say 2 years because it's been barely once a week phone call or a text to me. I like constant communication, talking and texting. I'm just wired that way. I'm not leading him on. I do like him and but I guess I just don't want to get hurt because I've been hurt in the past.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You don’t like this guy’s communication style and it seems he thinks you are leading him on.

You’re just not into him. Move on.


This. Just let him go. You're not a match. Because this is just his personality.

It might be that he was content with what was happening for a few years but now feels ready for a more serious relationship and not so much pen pals.
Anonymous
He’s low effort and wants an easy lay.

He’s low effort. Quite common these days. Perpetual texting with the hope for a bang when the timing works out.
Anonymous
Do you make an effort to talk about his day and things that matter to you even if he doesn’t. It will become a habit the more you do it. Let him know the thoughts you shared here before you meet him
Anonymous
I’d meet him then decide whether I still like him and proceed accordingly. Some people are bad with texting but better in person. Why have you kept in contact all this time?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I’d meet him then decide whether I still like him and proceed accordingly. Some people are bad with texting but better in person. Why have you kept in contact all this time?


Agree. It sounds like it’s not a huge hassle for you to meet up so see what happens.
Anonymous
You're willing to stay in touch with someone for two years, but you don't want to meet in person when he happens to be visiting your area?

I'd meet up with someone who happened to be in my area and was interested in saying hello even if we'd only talked a few times or even someone who was a friend of a friend!
Anonymous
He shouldn't waste any more of HIS time without meeting you.
Anonymous
Examine your feelings, do you want to spend time with him? If yes, meet in a public place only. No family. Just you two. You drive yourself. Let a friend know about the situation, his name, share your location for the day, and send you a text to check in.
If no, it’s ok. This may be the way it ends, and that’s ok. He revealed something to you that you don’t like.
Anonymous
Why have you even been talking to him?
Anonymous
Op, let him hit it. You might like it too, who knows.
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