No libido or desire for sex

[Anonymous]

Early 50s and I think I’m in peri? But I’ve noticed in the last 5-6 years I have not wanted any sexual contact. It is never on my mind and there is no desire for it. I feel bad for my DH because he has been so patient and very understanding. He is always very romantic and tries, but I see some frustration as I turn him away. I know he has a big libido and has always been in overdrive mode, even as he gets older. Not sure how he deals. (Not that I would understand.) I don’t know what to do. HRT?

[Anonymous]

Girl, red alert, your husband is the kind that eventually loses his mind and wanders.

I wish I could trade you my husband. He’d be content to never have sex again.

[Anonymous]

I would honestly rather let my husband just go get his needs met elsewhere. I’m so tired of pleasing people and I don’t want to take medicine just to plea them.

[Anonymous]

^ please

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Early 50s and I think I’m in peri? But I’ve noticed in the last 5-6 years I have not wanted any sexual contact. It is never on my mind and there is no desire for it. I feel bad for my DH because he has been so patient and very understanding. He is always very romantic and tries, but I see some frustration as I turn him away. I know he has a big libido and has always been in overdrive mode, even as he gets older. Not sure how he deals. (Not that I would understand.) I don’t know what to do. HRT?

I’m in menopause and went on HRT a year or so after onset. It hadn’t done anything to restore my once very high libido. I couldn’t care less if I ever have sex again, but I’m single so that’s a perfectly acceptable status quo for me.

My understanding is that testosterone is more useful in restoring sex drive, but it can have some unpleasant side effects so you’ll want to weight the risk/beenfit analysis with your GYN or PCP.

[Anonymous]

Talk to your Dr. But remember something you don’t do will be something 5 others are waiting to do.

[Anonymous]

Estrogen/progesterone alone might help but more than likely you would need testosterone or one of the non hormonal options like Addyi or Vyleesi.

[Anonymous]

It's a normal part of ageing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Talk to your Dr. But remember something you don’t do will be something 5 others are waiting to do.

The thing is I doubt this.

[Anonymous]

I don't think it is ok for you not to do sexual activity with your husband if you don't have any desire. Either get a treatment for it or divorce your DH if he is this nice. It is emotional abuse if you are keeping him tied up but not fulfilling his needs.

[Anonymous]

I am 43F and in perimenopause. Completely lost desire to do anything and my BF broke up with me because sex was like a chore for me or I was looking to avoid it. We discussed it a few times on how to make it work but didn't have desire for anything.

[Anonymous]

OP. Do you sleep with your hubby? Perhaps you can please him in other ways, like BJs or manual wankers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 43F and in perimenopause. Completely lost desire to do anything and my BF broke up with me because sex was like a chore for me or I was looking to avoid it. We discussed it a few times on how to make it work but didn't have desire for anything.

Girl why would you even have a man if you didn’t want sex, you get to have a peaceful man-free existence with friends so lean into that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 43F and in perimenopause. Completely lost desire to do anything and my BF broke up with me because sex was like a chore for me or I was looking to avoid it. We discussed it a few times on how to make it work but didn't have desire for anything.

Girl why would you even have a man if you didn’t want sex, you get to have a peaceful man-free existence with friends so lean into that!

because I crave emotional and physical connection (without sex) and man give me a lot of security and protection. It's not like I don't want to provide sex but there is no desire from inside. I gained a lot of weight and that causes a lot of it too. I also feel lonely from time to time and always enjoyed partner's company.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP. Do you sleep with your hubby? Perhaps you can please him in other ways, like BJs or manual wankers.

I don;t think OP has any sexual desire to give BJs or HJs. That is the problem.