Was recovery after second harder for you?

[Anonymous]

I always heard that labor gets easier for second (+) kid but just had my second and labor and recovery has been significantly harder. The labor was faster but hurt more. Both were vaginal deliveries with no major issues but I just feel so much more wrecked. I am really surprised by this. What is everyone else’s experience?

[Anonymous]

First delivery was harder and I had some tearing. Second time was easier. However, my bladder control was completely gone after kid 2 was born. Took lots of therapy to improve, and I’m still not completely normal two years later.

[Anonymous]

Delivery was much worse for #2 and 3. Body did not bounce back at all.

A friend did a VBAC after having twins for #1. 4th degree tear (all the way through). Boy did she regret that.

[Anonymous]

My delivery and recovery were MUCH easier the second time. My second was 11 oz smaller than my first with a much smaller head. I only pushed for 10 minutes vs 2 hours. I had a retained placenta and they attempted manual extraction before moving to a D&C, but even then I had nowhere near the same amount of swelling and soreness as after the first one.

[Anonymous]

2 vaginal deliveries, first was back labor and hurt, 2nd was quick and easy and relatively pain free (compared to back labor with #1), but we had a toddler at home, so everything was more difficult

[Anonymous]

Yeah, having another child at home definitely makes recovery harder. There is never a break ever.

[Anonymous]

No, but a faster delivery can be a harder recovery.

[Anonymous]

You’ll feel better soon. Try to rest as much as you can. Keep the kids on a schedule that prioritizes your rest and theirs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’ll feel better soon. Try to rest as much as you can. Keep the kids on a schedule that prioritizes your rest and theirs.

+1 You will feel better soon. Enlist help, hydrate and do your best to get some sleep when you can. I think you will find responses here will be all over the map so not particularly helpful or reassuring. You've got this!

[Anonymous]

Nope, had 2 C- sections and recovery for my second was way way easier. Like, exponentially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope, had 2 C- sections and recovery for my second was way way easier. Like, exponentially.

Honestly, this tracks with most anecdotes I’ve heard (particularly if the first was an unplanned C.)

OP — I know a lot of vaginal delivery folks who take much longer (a full year —- up to and including managing chronic injuries like prolapse and urinary incontinence for life) after delivery #2, mostly because more of the support structures in the pelvic floor have been wiped out after a second delivery. Don’t lift your toddler (you aren’t supposed to no matter which way you delivered), gentle walks, and book in with a pelvic floor pt when you are cleared for internal work.

[Anonymous]

No, my second was a piece of cake compared to 3 hours of pushing a sunny side up baby with my first. I think I had dozens of stitches. The Dr lost count. I couldn’t walk properly for months.

[Anonymous]

I was completely wrecked after my first--huge episiotomy that took forever to heal, prolapse, etc. I also had PPD. It took months for me to feel like myself again, mentally and physically. OTOH, I lost the weight almost immediately--it just melted away--and externally I looked completely unchanged. No permanent difference in my waist or hips or shoe size, no stretch marks.

My second (5 years later) was the opposite: really easy labor and delivery, I felt terrific afterwards with no physical issues and no PPD (in fact, I had a huge endorphin high for several weeks after delivery). But, though I gained no more than I had gained with my first pregnancy, it took a lot longer for me to lose the weight; I permanently went up half a size in shoes; even after I lost all the weight, my waist was never as small as it had been before; and I had a few stretchmarks.

[Anonymous]

It seems like the older you are the more effects on your body. I had my first in my 20s and gained 50 lbs but 6 months later looked like I had never been pregnant. Second baby in 30s I gained much less weight but ended up with stretch marks, wrinkled stomach skin and an umbilical hernia.

[Anonymous]

My second labor was fast and easy and smaller baby. But recovery harder because I was 38 and had a potty training kid at home. A lot less rest was possible.