Daughter has secret Instagram account.

[Anonymous]

We don't let our 14 year old daughter use any type of social media. We know how dangerous it can be and think she's too young anyway. We just found out she had been using Instagram online on her phone. She had made an account, posted stories and has a lot of followers that aren't any of her school friends. They are mutual connections that she's never even met before. Husband and I are livid and we don't know what to do and how to punish her. Has anyone gone through the same or any suggestions?

[Anonymous]

Maybe better off to monitor her in secret

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe better off to monitor her in secret

I agree with this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe better off to monitor her in secret

What do you mean by this?

[Anonymous]

NP. Reframe. You recognize that your daughter is too young to use instagram so maybe she’s also too young to understand why it’s not healthy for her. If she doesn’t have the capacity to understand, you don’t punish, you educate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe better off to monitor her in secret

What do you mean by this?

I think they mean follow her anonymously and see what she gets up to.

[Anonymous]

Delete her account, delete Instagram and take her phone. She has proven she is not mature enough to have one.

[Anonymous]

You need to block apps and specific websites with parental controls. And they will still probably log in and create one on a friend’s device. But at least they won’t be using it 24/7.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to block apps and specific websites with parental controls. And they will still probably log in and create one on a friend’s device. But at least they won’t be using it 24/7.

We already have 1 hour screen time limit for all apps together and phone handed in to us at 7pm.

[Anonymous]

Lose phone for a month, lock it down further including preventing her from installing any apps.

[Anonymous]

That’s what happens if you impose ridiculous rules and prohibitions.

Let her have an account. Go on her phone in secret from time to time to monitor it (you’ll see everything as if it were her).

[Anonymous]

It shouldn't be about punishment. What's the natural consequence? Teach about safety.

[Anonymous]

Yeah good luck.
Your child is going to find a way to access IG.

[Anonymous]

She's just trying to stay up with things as her friends probably have it. It's teen tribalism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to block apps and specific websites with parental controls. And they will still probably log in and create one on a friend’s device. But at least they won’t be using it 24/7.

We already have 1 hour screen time limit for all apps together and phone handed in to us at 7pm.

Wait…your 14 year old has to turn her phone in at 7? No wonder she’s sneaking around.