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Given everything that’s going on, this might not be the best time for this question but I’ve been struggling. My DH is a fed so we have that part too.
I started a new job this summer as a manager at a large corporation. The workload is incredibly high and I’m working on meeting my deadlines, learning the system, supporting my employees, etc. I need to disconnect from work in the evenings and over the weekends. I have a family and I want to give them my attention too. And, stressing about work 24/7 is unhealthy. How do you disconnect and focus on the other part of life? |
| At specific end times. Don't answer emails after 6 or whatever. Really disconnect and do a physical hobby of some sort so your mind is focused elsewhere. |
| Lexapro and yoga. Every day on both —even if you can find only 20 minutes for the yoga. Hatha (holding poses for a long long time, as an emphasis; none of this hot yoga sh$t) with a focus on the meditative aspect. |
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I'm sure this is hard with the added pressure of your job feeling important because of the instability of fed work right now. My spouse has the lower paying non-fed job and I definitely feel stressed out about losing my income and benefits because theirs won't pay the bills. So you may be feeling that on the other side.
Do your best to disconnect from work when you're off work, as PP mentioned. But it's probably a hard time for your family ecosystem too and you can't always separate those. Give yourself and your husband as much patience and grace as you can. |
| Can you outsource work or hire pt? |
| Rubber band on wrist? Snap it every time you think about work when you are home. Or something similar. |
| I am in the same boat, it is because we are chronically understaffed. I however have the benefit of being at my org for a long time. I have realized that even if I work 24/7, I’m still getting the same merit and bonus than if I work a healthy ~45-50 hours per week. Why should everything else in my life suffer if I’m going to end up in the same place come merit season? |
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I try to block out my day so I am (1) not multitasking; and (2) setting boundaries.
I build in 20 minute blocks for dealing with email and 10 minute blocks for meditation or a quick walk. Those tiny breaks (2-3 day) make a huge difference in clearing my head, staying fresh, and relieving stress. |
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OP here. I’m trying to institute one or two 10-minute walks a day to re-align my brain.
I’m also trying to focus on small weekend things that I personally enjoy besides being present for my family. I started a jigsaw puzzle. I went roller skating (with the family but it really was for me). This is taking work to remain centered. |
Seperate the two. Work is just for money, it's not a lifestyle, unless you are independently wealthy, in which case you don't need the money so why work? |
Good luck, OP. I’m the same way and I constantly worry about work. I try to talk myself down and walking really helps. |
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What helped me was:
Lexapro (but I have depression and anxiety and had been fighting medication for a long time) Seeing a career counselor for about 8 months, to discuss why I felt so stuck and unsatisfied Being furloughed by Covid for 6 months, which made me realized that they could get rid of me in a second, even if I did an excellent job Switching jobs within my same company (lateral move) to a manager and work that is not proud of fire drills or last minute bs Having a close family member die unexpectedly at 48, and realizing that everyone loved her, and the last thing they cared about was her job performance |