Should parents who travel a lot for work always bring back soemthing for kids?

[Anonymous]

I don’t mean something big. More like a postcard, a hotel one, a unique local candy, etc.

DH always used to being DD something on trips. Recently he’s stopped. DD is really hurt. He’s also stopped texting or FaceTiming during trips. He’s argued that there isn’t time and he’s too busy.

I traveled extensively for work until DD was in K and there was never a time that I couldn’t at least get a cute cocktail stirrer from a lounge bartender or a postcard from the hotel stationary drawer. FaceTime was sometimes hard when the time difference was weird but when I knew it would be really off I would leave a note to open for each day.

I think DH needs to step it up. These are 7-8 day trips that include weekend days and he’s missing a lot. He’s flying in business and first fwiw.

What do you think, traveling parents?

[Anonymous]

Wake up and smell the coffee. He’s having an affair.

[Anonymous]

I don’t have a practice of bringing stuff back. But my travel is to boring domestic places and who needs random crap from a place your kids weren’t even at? I also generally didn’t FT or call as out of sight out of mind. (I’m a mom, fwiw). My kids are older now and we do call and text, sometimes I’ll buy something if it’s really cool.

Husband has cool international travel and he does bring back souvenirs. I don’t think there’s a hard and fast rule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wake up and smell the coffee. He’s having an affair.

I actually think this too. It’s the no FaceTiming for me. Seems like he’s built a wall between ‘family’ and ‘other’ and never the two shall meet.

Yes, i’ve travelled a lot and ALWAYS found 10 minutes to sneak away to FaceTime and say hi/goodnight to my kids. Every day.

Regarding the gifts, I’d say I got them something about 50% of the time when they were in elementary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean something big. More like a postcard, a hotel one, a unique local candy, etc.

DH always used to being DD something on trips. Recently he’s stopped. DD is really hurt. He’s also stopped texting or FaceTiming during trips. He’s argued that there isn’t time and he’s too busy.

I traveled extensively for work until DD was in K and there was never a time that I couldn’t at least get a cute cocktail stirrer from a lounge bartender or a postcard from the hotel stationary drawer. FaceTime was sometimes hard when the time difference was weird but when I knew it would be really off I would leave a note to open for each day.

I think DH needs to step it up. These are 7-8 day trips that include weekend days and he’s missing a lot. He’s flying in business and first fwiw.

What do you think, traveling parents?

I think he’s too busy at the hotel’s gift shop getting a bathrobe for someone else.

[Anonymous]

What I think is that you need to pull your head out of the sand, OP. You’re describing textbook behavior. He’s too “busy” to FaceTime because he doesn’t want you to accidentally see Schmoopie in the background. Start digging around.

[Anonymous]

I’m a mom and don’t like FaceTiming while traveling either, and I’m definitely not having an affair. My workaround is to send/receive video messages. I do always bring them something.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I think so. DH always brings back a small gift for our kids.

[Anonymous]

Something, even from the airport is nice but it does seem silly after a certain age. Are you sure he's not having an affair? Maybe he's not going where he says he is.

[Anonymous]

Something always? No. Your DD "is really hurt"?? -- what a drama queen

[Anonymous]

My dad always used to send us postcards. I still have them. The thought is the important thing, not the size of the gift.

[Anonymous]

No- get out of the gift stuff. This is crazy. Your child doesn’t need to think that you feel loved if someone brings you things. But yes, calls are important. A voice message if really he’s busy and isn’t able to call while your child is home/awake.

But really - I’d suggest ending the connection of random crap and travel. No one needs that drink stirrer you’d pick up. It’s just junk.

[Anonymous]

I always bring something back but it is something small and edible like a bag of gummy candy or similar, like Garrett's popcorn when at the airport in Chicago.

[Anonymous]

My father traveled a lot for work, and he only rarely brought me back things. Neither of my parents were spendy people or the kind to buy trinkets. But when I was a teen, he knew I liked Japanese pop culture characters, stationery and pens, and always brought back a little something from his trips there.

I think your kids have been raised wrong if they expect little gifts after each trip.

[Anonymous]

My dad always brought back a snow globe, magnet and keychain from any new place he traveled to, for us kids. We have such a a great collection now. Mom got something much nicer, usually something unique to the place. This was before the era of FaceTime so he’d call occasionally.