How often do you visit if your child is a plane ride away?

[Anonymous]

My DD is a sophomore on the other side of the country. We are navigating the challenges including sending her to move in/ move out by herself. I was curious for others in the situation, how often do you visit? We are planning on once this year for Parent’s Weekend in October. Her dad is possibly also going for Father’s weekend with her sorority (I went to mom’s weekend last year). How about you? Is it different if it is your son vs daughter?

[Anonymous]

It just depends on the situation. One of my kids I only went for parents weekend only, and not every year. A different kid, I also went for the fraternity mom's weekend and my husband went for the dad's weekend. A third kid, I went on a different weekend that was not parents weekend and no other time.

[Anonymous]

DS is now a senior. Looking back it’s been once a school year plus move in first two years.

[Anonymous]

First year move-in and first time pack-up for storage.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, the semester goes fast.

[Anonymous]

Thanks everyone- it seems that around 1x a year is pretty common. I was just feeling guilty as my daughter is moving in right now and is trying to navigate getting to the storage unit and setting up her room all alone. I know she's fine and can manage, but I also know that having a parent there would make things a lot easier!

[Anonymous]

For us, we went roughly every 4-5 weeks as DS was an athlete and liked for us to go to games (which we also enjoyed). Cost wasn't an issue, which it often can be and we were fortunate not to have to take that into account.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks everyone- it seems that around 1x a year is pretty common. I was just feeling guilty as my daughter is moving in right now and is trying to navigate getting to the storage unit and setting up her room all alone. I know she's fine and can manage, but I also know that having a parent there would make things a lot easier!

It would be easier if you were there. For most of my kids, a parent has helped with move in for second year, but not always. There are life lessons in learning to do it by oneself, if only the confidence that they can.

[Anonymous]

We did not fly out to see DD her freshman year. She came home for Thanksgiving, winter break and spring break because her dorm was closed. We helped her move in to her apartment right before sophomore year, but we would have been visiting Colorado in the summer anyway. She came home less frequently once she had an apartment.

[Anonymous]

DS went to school 1,200 miles away. We flew out to help him move in and to help him move out (he lived in three places over four years). We also visited him each year over Thanksgiving.

[Anonymous]

She just called and is mostly moved in- luckily the 27-hour day makes things easier when flying West- at least when you are young! There were a few tears in the morning as she felt overwhelmed, but many of her friends helped. I still feel a bit guilty, but it seems like it all worked out, and I will look forward to visiting in October.

[Anonymous]

DD went to university in Europe. We visited once a year, if that.

[Anonymous]

Abt 3x a school year, inc parents’ weekend but excluding move in.

[Anonymous]

My kid is leaving for a school a plane ride away. With fall break/ Thanksgiving/ Spring Break/ Easter, I'm expecting to see the kid every six weeks.

If there's ever a stretch longer than six weeks, I'll probably go out there.

For move in and move out, after the first year, I'm not sure it's worth it to go (unless there's a social aspect with other kids and their parents that I don't know about). Seems better to spend the $$ on visits between breaks.

[Anonymous]

Whenever you miss them.