Son moved out, started lifting… now he’s huge. Not sure I like it.

[Anonymous]

I know kids change a lot in their 20s, but this one really caught me off guard.

My son is 25 and doing great. He’s got a solid job in his field, just moved out with a good friend from high school, and seems happy. Since moving out, he’s been working out a ton (5–6 days a week, lifting heavy) and eating a lot. He says he’s “bulking” before leaning out.

He’s always been lean and athletic, but now he’s built like a linebacker. The last time he was home I found out he’s 6’1” and about 225 lbs. He still dresses well, takes care of himself, and it’s not like he’s let himself go. It’s just a lot more mass than I’m used to.

I think part of my reaction is that I’m so used to seeing him as my lean, wiry kid. It’s a big mental adjustment to see him looking like a pro football player. I’ve made a few comments to him about it, but he just laughs and says he’s fine. My husband thinks I’m overreacting and actually says it’s impressive, so I’m the odd one out here.

It’s not that I think he’s unhealthy, it’s more that I’m surprised at how much he’s changed in such a short time. Has anyone else been caught off guard by their adult kids’ appearance changing, especially when it’s not related to anything bad, just… different? How did you get used to it?

[Anonymous]

Maybe he’s gay

[Anonymous]

You are not the one having sex with him. As long as it works for him, I'd not worry.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, he sounds fine. He’s young, working out, eating, and living his life. “Bulking” usually means he’ll slim back down later anyway. I think this is just one of those mom moments where your mental picture hasn’t caught up with reality. Give it some time, you might get used to “linebacker son.”

[Anonymous]

As long as he’s not using supplements it’s fine

[Anonymous]

I would have killed to be over 6' and 200lbs at 25.

Your husband is being much more rational about this than you are. I would follow his lead on this and stop nagging him about it.

[Anonymous]

You raised a soy boy and now he’s a MAGA boy? 😮

[Anonymous]

Men's metabolism slow down in their 20s. He was never going to stay a wiry 22 year old forever.

Also, he's 6'1", that's tall and most dudes that tall will fill out that frame in their 20s. He was probably already 190lbs before bulking so its not like he was some small individual before.

[Anonymous]

I have two sons, one 6'0 and the other 6'2 about 150lbs. They are athletic but skinny.

I actually encourage them to exercise, possibly lift and eat better.

At 6.1", an ideal healthy look would be in the 190lbs weight range.

I am familiar with "bulking", very common in Football players, I would be concern about him using steroids to achieve the weight though.

But hey, at least he's not coming home with an outgrown hair/beard and belly and full of crazy tattoos.

[Anonymous]

The OPs son probably gets increased attention from women after bulking up and its making Mom mad that shes no longer the center of his attention LOL

[Anonymous]

6'1" and 225lbs with him not being fat is impressive. Maybe give yourself some credit for good genetics (unless he is abusing supplements) and lay off of him.

[Anonymous]

You baby boy is a man.

[Anonymous]

He's a grown man now...I do get the jarring aspect though. My son went from 140lbs as a HS senior to 200lbs by the time he graduated college. Mostly muscle and some fat.

At first I hated it, now I think he looks better than before. Just give it time and lay off him.

[Anonymous]

No because my kids started bulking or whatever in hs

[Anonymous]

If he's not using supplements and lets say he went from 190 to 225 in a lil over a year...then he probably looks good.

Your genetics played a role in that too. Some people can simply just eat more and do basic lifts at the gym and become big in no time. Other cannot. He's very much a grown man now and you need to cope with that.