How to elevate at-home bithday party for teen turning 17?

[Anonymous]

DD is turning 17. We have had the same format for the past 3-4 parties: dinner and board games at home; sometimes, we throw in a craft like decorating canvas bags with fabric markers. I am begging her to have her birthday gathering at a restaurant but she prefers to invite friends over, but I feel like it's almost not even age appropriate. What activities can I add or how can I enhance the gathering so it seems more age-appropriate?

[Anonymous]

Photo booth, karaoke?

[Anonymous]

You don’t need to elevate this party.
This party is not about you.
This party is about your daughter.
Your daughter wants a home birthday party.
It is in the budget.
We know her friends will show up, because they’ve shown up prior years.
A Photo Booth is over the top. Karaoke is over the top. Order nicer food if you’re worried about looking cheap.

[Anonymous]

Movie night!!

[Anonymous]

My teen dd loves having home birthdays! She chooses the food and activities. I buy the stuff and help set and clean up, but the rest is up to her. Don’t stress—give her what she wants!

[Anonymous]

Let her do whatever she wants. You don't need to come up with ideas. She and her friends should plan what they want to do. I'd give her a budget and tell her to give you a week or so notice to get whatever she needs.

[Anonymous]

She’s 17, there is absolutely nothing you need to do to plan activities if she doesn’t want you to. She is 1 year away from adulthood for crying out loud!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD is turning 17. We have had the same format for the past 3-4 parties: dinner and board games at home; sometimes, we throw in a craft like decorating canvas bags with fabric markers. I am begging her to have her birthday gathering at a restaurant but she prefers to invite friends over, but I feel like it's almost not even age appropriate. What activities can I add or how can I enhance the gathering so it seems more age-appropriate?

You would be wrong. I’m in my 40s, and this sounds like an ideal birthday party to me. I just want a quiet night with my friends.

OP, try to dig into what you’re feeling. Is it embarassment? If so, what do you make up that other people are thinking or feeling? You need to manage your emotions around this.

[Anonymous]

if this is what she wants, go for it! save yourself the time and expense. we did a lot of that at that age - pizza and a movie and card games- or got take out - or made a simple dinner and ate a lot of snacks. ask her what she wants. and be happy that your daughter wants to be around home hanging out with her friends.

[Anonymous]

What? Hanging out at home and having cake is totally age appropriate. You don't need to arrange any crafts or games or themes, unless she wants to do that. They can just watch movies or just chill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let her do whatever she wants. You don't need to come up with ideas. She and her friends should plan what they want to do. I'd give her a budget and tell her to give you a week or so notice to get whatever she needs.

This.
Then use the opportunity to get out of the house and leave them alone and have some time to yourself somewhere else.

[Anonymous]

I’ll answer your question. You could but/rent an outdoor movie set up and have a big screen in the back yard. Camp chairs or blankets and pillows, great snacks.

Or you could hire the at home hibachi people do to dinner in the backyard tapenyaki style. So fun, definitely a splurge to have the whole dinner/show.

[Anonymous]

Ha! I'm having friends over for my 40th tomorrow and the plan is just to eat homemade food and hang.

[Anonymous]

You don’t need a Photo Booth, iPhones have apps that make really cool pictures.

At that age they love to talk a lot. It’ll be fun.

[Anonymous]

You should not be involved in any of this at 17 unless she asks for your opinion. Let her do what she wants.

And to the other poster who said karaoke is over the top, my DD wanted this at 13 and we got one from Amazon for $40. Best money spent for that at home party. But it was what she wanted with some food.