WFH

[Anonymous]

Is considering taking a job that is remote. I know that sounds ideal, and so much of it is, but there are a few flaws -
1. He is an extreme extrovert. On the few days that he works from home, he’s itching to get out of the house and do something by the end of the day. I’m afraid he will drive me crazy because I’m more of an introvert and I’m happier to be home.
2. I really don’t need him micromanaging my life or judging me. I work part-time, volunteer at my kids school, coach varsity sport, but take my downtime during the day bc that is when I get it. From 3-10 I’m busting my tale. I’m not sure he fully comprehends this and if I want a nap at 1:00, then I deserve one! When he is done with his workday, he gets his downtime.

Any ideas on this? How to keep our marriage, healthy and intact.? Are there places that he could go to work during the day that don’t cost much money? Any advice would be helpful..

[Anonymous]

Sorry ** DH

[Anonymous]

Uhh you plan on keeping this new job long when you're napping during core work hours and heading ou at 3?

[Anonymous]

She is talking about her husband!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is considering taking a job that is remote. I know that sounds ideal, and so much of it is, but there are a few flaws -
1. He is an extreme extrovert. On the few days that he works from home, he’s itching to get out of the house and do something by the end of the day. I’m afraid he will drive me crazy because I’m more of an introvert and I’m happier to be home.
2. I really don’t need him micromanaging my life or judging me. I work part-time, volunteer at my kids school, coach varsity sport, but take my downtime during the day bc that is when I get it. From 3-10 I’m busting my tale. I’m not sure he fully comprehends this and if I want a nap at 1:00, then I deserve one! When he is done with his workday, he gets his downtime.

Any ideas on this? How to keep our marriage, healthy and intact.? Are there places that he could go to work during the day that don’t cost much money? Any advice would be helpful..

Why would your husband work elsewhere? The idea of your DH working from the library or a coffee shop so you don’t feel judged napping at 1 pm is irrational. Does he think you work full time or are more productive? Just align with him on things if you are afraid of judgement; don’t try to kick him out of the house so you can maintain some facade of business.

I WFH and on the days my husband is also WFH we both do our own thing. He’s not mad I went for a run and I’m not mad he bought a coffee.

If your spouse going to WFH puts stress on your marriage it probably needs some TLC.

[Anonymous]

He needs to have video meetings, leave the house for a walk at lunch time (maybe go work out then?) and have an office where he's tucked away and not seeing you splayed out on the couch watching talk shows.

[Anonymous]

Sorry Wine Mom the gig is up!

[Anonymous]

This thread is going to be epic.

OP you work part time. If you start at 9 you can nap at 1. Why are you feeling like you need to explain to your DH? Why are you feeling defensive? Do you actually drop the rope on a lot of things or do you really "bust your tale"?

[Anonymous]

This is an issue for us - DH works from home and I work out of the house. By the time I get home 5:30-6, I have been out of the house for 11ish hours. I am ready to be home (kids are older and can drive themselves to stuff.) DH has been trapped in the house working and wants to get out - go for a walk, go to the store, go to dinner...anything. I give in and go do something about 1/3 of the time - the other 1/3 he goes alone - the other 1/3 he stays home and we hang together.

DH was rather annoyed for awhile until he needed to go in for a week of in person meetings and was gone 10 hrs/day and then crashed when he got home.

[Anonymous]

He needs a dedicated office in the house, where he stays. He shouldn't be in the main area or wandering the house on calls. You guys need to talk about expectations for this.

After work, he needs buddies or a hobby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is considering taking a job that is remote. I know that sounds ideal, and so much of it is, but there are a few flaws -
1. He is an extreme extrovert. On the few days that he works from home, he’s itching to get out of the house and do something by the end of the day. I’m afraid he will drive me crazy because I’m more of an introvert and I’m happier to be home.
2. I really don’t need him micromanaging my life or judging me. I work part-time, volunteer at my kids school, coach varsity sport, but take my downtime during the day bc that is when I get it. From 3-10 I’m busting my tale. I’m not sure he fully comprehends this and if I want a nap at 1:00, then I deserve one! When he is done with his workday, he gets his downtime.

Any ideas on this? How to keep our marriage, healthy and intact.? Are there places that he could go to work during the day that don’t cost much money? Any advice would be helpful..

Why would your husband work elsewhere? The idea of your DH working from the library or a coffee shop so you don’t feel judged napping at 1 pm is irrational. Does he think you work full time or are more productive? Just align with him on things if you are afraid of judgement; don’t try to kick him out of the house so you can maintain some facade of business.

I WFH and on the days my husband is also WFH we both do our own thing. He’s not mad I went for a run and I’m not mad he bought a coffee.

If your spouse going to WFH puts stress on your marriage it probably needs some TLC.

OP here - This is a great point and very valid. And to answer another question that was on here, I am very on top of things when it comes to paying bills, keeping track of our lives, doing all the paperwork, dealing with kids schoolwork, doing finances, paying taxes, etc. but sometimes I do slack with laundry and housework.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Uhh you plan on keeping this new job long when you're napping during core work hours and heading ou at 3?

Hahaha OP here - I work a few hours in the morning from home and then work at 3 and am pretty tied up though the night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He needs to have video meetings, leave the house for a walk at lunch time (maybe go work out then?) and have an office where he's tucked away and not seeing you splayed out on the couch watching talk shows.

Op here. There’s definitely a higher chance of him watching TV during the day, lol. I think going for a workout is a great idea. He definitely needs something social during the day or he’s going to go crazy.

[Anonymous]

Get him signed up for all kid activity duty. He can stand on the sidelines at practice, start the carpool for other kids, attend all dr appts, organize play dates, go shopping for their new shoes, etc.

[Anonymous]

You and your DH just learn to respect what the other brings to the family. We all deserve to slack a little if we are tired but not so much that it's burdensome for the other partner.