Activities you would never do...

[Anonymous]

...had an interesting discussion with a mom who would never allow her dc to play lacrosse (mine do) whereas I would never allow my dc to play football (hers do). What are some activities you'd never allow your dc to do and why?

[Anonymous]

Lax...toxic culture
POMS...degrading to girls

[Anonymous]

Ride an ATV.

[Anonymous]

Hockey - the practice times for our local team are ridiculous
Ballet and gymnastics. My sister and I were pretty involved in these growing up and they were incredibly toxic environments.

[Anonymous]

I probably have more on the no list than the yes list... No dance, cheerleading, gymnastics, or figure skating because of body image and toxic people. No equestrian (or figure skating) because of the cost. No football because of head injuries.

It isn't a hard "never" but we dropped out of softball because it was way too intense immediately and the parents were extra but the official reason was that dd had too many other things going on. I was glad to say bye to softball though.

[Anonymous]

Cheerleading and other activities that overly sexualize girls.
Football unless my kid begged, I wouldn’t sign my kid up just to try it though, Like I have with other sports.

[Anonymous]

Ride an atv, jetski or motorcycle.

[Anonymous]

I would never disallow any activity, but we actively discourage certain activities beyond a rec level. Like gymnastics -- my DD wanted to do it and enjoys it, we are happy for her to go, we are sticking with rec and resisting pressure to put her in a competitive program. Same with dance -- happy to do any kind of dance class, zero interest in competitive dance. If I had boys I'd allow non-tackle football.

I'm also a travel sport skeptic. I'm not saying "no way" -- I think there are reasons to do it if a kid is very committed to the sport, you find a team you like, the team is a source of community, etc. What I am against is doing travel sports as a matter of course, the attitude that at a certain grade you simply graduate to travel teams and that's what everyone does. I think it contributes to some of the toxicity of modern parenting culture, where everyone is always doing everything to the max. It's a conversation, not a default.

But in general I think pretty much any activity can be good if your kid has a genuine interest and if precautions are taken for safety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ride an ATV.

Same. When I was a kid I knew a family whose teenage son was paralyzed from an ATV accident. That story traumatized me.

Also, no tackle football. I’m also souring on trampoline parks but it hasn’t come up yet (my kids are little).

OP, what was the person’s issue with lacrosse?

[Anonymous]

Other than money, which would probably still rule out equestrian if my kid hadn't shook with terror the one time she was a horse, I don't have restrictions. I have preferences, but I've known people who have had positive experiences with everything people say no to. My BIL played football and that was the right choice for him, an old coworker was a former Miss Virginia and pageants had been a really positive experience for her, etc.

We're too middle class for some stuff to be possible, but I wouldn't say no off the bat to anything we could afford.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP, what was the person’s issue with lacrosse?

As someone said above, it was about the toxic culture - in their opinion. The dad had gone to college with a lacrosse player who had OD'd so that left an impression. My dd plays lacrosse and so far, it's been great but there is obviously a difference between boys and girls lacrosse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Other than money, which would probably still rule out equestrian if my kid hadn't shook with terror the one time she was a horse, I don't have restrictions. I have preferences, but I've known people who have had positive experiences with everything people say no to. My BIL played football and that was the right choice for him, an old coworker was a former Miss Virginia and pageants had been a really positive experience for her, etc.

We're too middle class for some stuff to be possible, but I wouldn't say no off the bat to anything we could afford.

No to pageants too. I forgot those were even a thing but that would be a definite no for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hockey - the practice times for our local team are ridiculous
Ballet and gymnastics. My sister and I were pretty involved in these growing up and they were incredibly toxic environments.

+1
I was very into ballet when growing up and would not allow my kids to go further than elementary in anything with the dance world.
I won’t allow my kids to do football, wrestling, atv’s, or trampolines. We have a family member who broke his neck.

[Anonymous]

Poms and cheer. Hard no. My girls are not sideline girls. Dance sure. Poms...no.

[Anonymous]

I only have boys. I would not do baseball. Those parents are crazy and the schedules are crazy for little kids. My friend’s sons play or practice literally 7 days a week in season and travel 3 states for games, and they are not even in the DC area, their area is more working-middle class. It’s too much. I’m not sure if I would allow football but it hasn’t come up for my kids yet - they are still in ES and none of their friends are talking about it yet.

If I had girls - no competitive dance, no ballet, no cheer, no gymnastics. It’s horrible for their body image and has soooo much risk of injury.