Are your friends with your dil or Sil’s parents?

[Anonymous]

Do you have to be? Of course it would be nice, and I guess when dcs were younger perhaps I thought that would be the case from a general standpoint. However, I really don’t want to have the pressure that we have to socialize. They are very different from us so no common interest or experiences, and do not keep a clean house at all ( I’m being nice saying it this way.) we’ve tried for our dc but I’m done.

We have moved out of state so that has helped but every time we are back in DC they seem to want to get together. I’ll do anything for my dc so if I have to do this 1-2 x a year I will but just curious where others fall!

*sadly my dh’s parents had passed away young so I have no perspective.

[Anonymous]

I think once or twice a year is fine. You don't have to go to their house, you can go to your children's house or a restaurant.

[Anonymous]

I mean you don’t have to but if you are asking it YTA if you don’t do it a couple of times per year then yes.

[Anonymous]

You didn't marry into their family -- if you don't like them, don't bother.

[Anonymous]

Am I friends with my SIL's parents? Lol, no! I see my SIL's father a few times a year. Last time was in January.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I friends with my SIL's parents? Lol, no! I see my SIL's father a few times a year. Last time was in January.

The last time my in-laws saw my father was our wedding in 2018, and they've seen my mother maybe twice when she was coming through town when we were visiting the in-laws. Can't fathom why they would ever spend any time together.

[Anonymous]

My sister actually travels and brings her family to see my in-laws (DH's parents). It think it's very sweet but not necessary.

[Anonymous]

You don’t have to be friends but you should be friendly to make these easy on your son and daughter-in-law.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My sister actually travels and brings her family to see my in-laws (DH's parents). It think it's very sweet but not necessary.

i mean, if they genuinely like each other, sure... but I don't actually know the names of the parents of my wife's siblings' spouses.

One and only time my parents met my in-laws was at our wedding, and I'm not sure they did anything other than exchange pleasantries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My sister actually travels and brings her family to see my in-laws (DH's parents). It think it's very sweet but not necessary.

i mean, if they genuinely like each other, sure... but I don't actually know the names of the parents of my wife's siblings' spouses.

One and only time my parents met my in-laws was at our wedding, and I'm not sure they did anything other than exchange pleasantries.

TBH the in-laws think it's a bit weird but if sister's family is in town and want to meet up, my in-laws always make the time to see them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My sister actually travels and brings her family to see my in-laws (DH's parents). It think it's very sweet but not necessary.

i mean, if they genuinely like each other, sure... but I don't actually know the names of the parents of my wife's siblings' spouses.

One and only time my parents met my in-laws was at our wedding, and I'm not sure they did anything other than exchange pleasantries.

and i think my sister SAW my in-laws at my wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you have to be? Of course it would be nice, and I guess when dcs were younger perhaps I thought that would be the case from a general standpoint. However, I really don’t want to have the pressure that we have to socialize. They are very different from us so no common interest or experiences, and do not keep a clean house at all ( I’m being nice saying it this way.) we’ve tried for our dc but I’m done.

We have moved out of state so that has helped but every time we are back in DC they seem to want to get together. I’ll do anything for my dc so if I have to do this 1-2 x a year I will but just curious where others fall!

*sadly my dh’s parents had passed away young so I have no perspective.

You don't have to be friends but you do need to be kind and friendly, not only for their sake but your own and your kid's. If you actively dislike or avoid them, not only they'll be hurt but so would be your child's spouse. It may cause rift in couple's relationship but their relationship with you as well.

[Anonymous]

Its can be awkward or uncomfortable for grandkids to know one set of their grandparents dislike other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you have to be? Of course it would be nice, and I guess when dcs were younger perhaps I thought that would be the case from a general standpoint. However, I really don’t want to have the pressure that we have to socialize. They are very different from us so no common interest or experiences, and do not keep a clean house at all ( I’m being nice saying it this way.) we’ve tried for our dc but I’m done.

We have moved out of state so that has helped but every time we are back in DC they seem to want to get together. I’ll do anything for my dc so if I have to do this 1-2 x a year I will but just curious where others fall!

*sadly my dh’s parents had passed away young so I have no perspective.

If you don't like their house cleaning skills, meat at your place or a neutral place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its can be awkward or uncomfortable for grandkids to know one set of their grandparents dislike other.

why would the grandkids even think their different sets of grandparents have even met?