Packer and Stuyvesant

[Anonymous]

My son got into both Stuyvesant and Packer, and we're having a hard time deciding which school would be the best fit. He’s leaning towards STEM, and while Stuyvesant has an excellent track record when it comes to college admissions (which is definitely a priority for us), we also see a lot of potential for him to thrive at Packer.

Packer seems like a great environment where he could really shine, based on what we’ve seen so far. That said, I’m aware that a lot of the admissions process at Packer might be influenced by legacy or donors. Cost is also a factor, though we’ve been offered financial aid at Packer, but still there is a significant contribution requirement.

[Anonymous]

The admissions process everywhere is influenced by legacy and donors. The academics at Stuy are on par with the TT privates, and the environment is competitive. Will your child do well in a "pressure cooker" atmosphere? If so and he's super-serious about STEM, choose Stuy. If he wants a more social high school experience with good-if-not-the-best academics, choose Packer.

[Anonymous]

Anecdotally, a friend of mine trains medical residents in Westchester and he says that recent Stuy grads (who did well enough there to make it to TT colleges and medical school) tend to have had a miserable time - not just the "pressure cooker" aspect but according to them there's also cutthroat competition and rampant cheating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anecdotally, a friend of mine trains medical residents in Westchester and he says that recent Stuy grads (who did well enough there to make it to TT colleges and medical school) tend to have had a miserable time - not just the "pressure cooker" aspect but according to them there's also cutthroat competition and rampant cheating.

My kid got into the top gifted magnet in our city, not NYC, and we found this. The student experience and environment was horrendous. The parent environment was worse. Talk about suicide was normalized. We moved her back to TT private at semester. So glad we did. Such a healthy choice! Now she will probably get to be valedictorian.

[Anonymous]

My friend who graduated from Stuy years ago commented on the large number of low income students there. School is their way out of poverty so yes they are highly focused and driven. But sometimes that pursuit is at the expense of other things in life. Their life experience and perspectives are also limited because of their family background. Of course students of the TT privates may have the same issue, but from the other extreme.

[Anonymous]

Yes stuy has a lot of cheating and everyone does it and if you don’t, you’re the odd one out and your grades suffer. It sounds awful. Check out Reddit threads for more information.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend who graduated from Stuy years ago commented on the large number of low income students there. School is their way out of poverty so yes they are highly focused and driven. But sometimes that pursuit is at the expense of other things in life. Their life experience and perspectives are also limited because of their family background. Of course students of the TT privates may have the same issue, but from the other extreme.

This.
I have a senior at Stuy.
Social capital isn't a shining feature of that school.

You will have your average NYC parent there, then you will have the paranoid immigrant who takes his child's phone away every night and downloads the contacts. And when that kid comes home a little later than usual, the paranoid immigrant parent will text every single contact that his son has run away and the police are called. One of my kid's classmates lives with this and he's one of the few willing to speak up about this oppressive family dynamic. A lot more don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend who graduated from Stuy years ago commented on the large number of low income students there. School is their way out of poverty so yes they are highly focused and driven. But sometimes that pursuit is at the expense of other things in life. Their life experience and perspectives are also limited because of their family background. Of course students of the TT privates may have the same issue, but from the other extreme.

I commute most days on the subway with lots of Stuy kids. There are plenty of exceptions to the rule, but your explanation is spot on. There are many kids who spent their whole lives studying for this one big test. They have zero social skills and have a glazed look in their eyes. For all of their great exmissions, there are lots of kids who get into Stuy and might do great but end up at CUNY, or perhaps a SUNY. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

The worst ones are the kids who have zero social skills but think they are super cool. There seem to be a lot of them. And they are insufferable.

We did not even consider Stuy for our child. Full disclosure - they scored high enough for every school but Stuy so it would not have been an option. But while those kids were being miserable studying all summer, our kid was being a normal kid, which will serve them better in life. And they are now thriving at a different HS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend who graduated from Stuy years ago commented on the large number of low income students there. School is their way out of poverty so yes they are highly focused and driven. But sometimes that pursuit is at the expense of other things in life. Their life experience and perspectives are also limited because of their family background. Of course students of the TT privates may have the same issue, but from the other extreme.

I commute most days on the subway with lots of Stuy kids. There are plenty of exceptions to the rule, but your explanation is spot on. There are many kids who spent their whole lives studying for this one big test. They have zero social skills and have a glazed look in their eyes. For all of their great exmissions, there are lots of kids who get into Stuy and might do great but end up at CUNY, or perhaps a SUNY. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

The worst ones are the kids who have zero social skills but think they are super cool. There seem to be a lot of them. And they are insufferable.

We did not even consider Stuy for our child. Full disclosure - they scored high enough for every school but Stuy so it would not have been an option. But while those kids were being miserable studying all summer, our kid was being a normal kid, which will serve them better in life. And they are now thriving at a different HS.

So what you are saying is your child wasn't accepted and you have no frame of reference aside from your commute

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend who graduated from Stuy years ago commented on the large number of low income students there. School is their way out of poverty so yes they are highly focused and driven. But sometimes that pursuit is at the expense of other things in life. Their life experience and perspectives are also limited because of their family background. Of course students of the TT privates may have the same issue, but from the other extreme.

I commute most days on the subway with lots of Stuy kids. There are plenty of exceptions to the rule, but your explanation is spot on. There are many kids who spent their whole lives studying for this one big test. They have zero social skills and have a glazed look in their eyes. For all of their great exmissions, there are lots of kids who get into Stuy and might do great but end up at CUNY, or perhaps a SUNY. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

The worst ones are the kids who have zero social skills but think they are super cool. There seem to be a lot of them. And they are insufferable.

We did not even consider Stuy for our child. Full disclosure - they scored high enough for every school but Stuy so it would not have been an option. But while those kids were being miserable studying all summer, our kid was being a normal kid, which will serve them better in life. And they are now thriving at a different HS.

So what you are saying is your child wasn't accepted and you have no frame of reference aside from your commute

Wow. Thanks for the snark. I was being honest. We did not put it on our list as we would not subject our child to that torture. If we had tortured our child and made them study all summer they might have gotten there, but they might not have. My child scored high enough to get in everywhere but there. We ended up choosing private over our selective offer as we wanted a smaller, more well-rounded environment. And we are truly blessed to have the resources to afford that - I know most don't have that choice. If I had to choose, I would take Bronx Science in a heartbeat over Stuy. Still a big number of academic grinds and awkward kids, but a lot more normal kids and just a more joyful environment while still having incredible resources.

I see dozens of the kids several days a week. They are either a) miserable or b) really poorly adjusted socially. There are definitely plenty of exceptions to that rule. But that is the majority.

I have a HS age child so I am very aware of how normal kids behave - I'm not some 90 year old. My child is not exactly the coolest kid on earth either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend who graduated from Stuy years ago commented on the large number of low income students there. School is their way out of poverty so yes they are highly focused and driven. But sometimes that pursuit is at the expense of other things in life. Their life experience and perspectives are also limited because of their family background. Of course students of the TT privates may have the same issue, but from the other extreme.

I commute most days on the subway with lots of Stuy kids. There are plenty of exceptions to the rule, but your explanation is spot on. There are many kids who spent their whole lives studying for this one big test. They have zero social skills and have a glazed look in their eyes. For all of their great exmissions, there are lots of kids who get into Stuy and might do great but end up at CUNY, or perhaps a SUNY. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

The worst ones are the kids who have zero social skills but think they are super cool. There seem to be a lot of them. And they are insufferable.

We did not even consider Stuy for our child. Full disclosure - they scored high enough for every school but Stuy so it would not have been an option. But while those kids were being miserable studying all summer, our kid was being a normal kid, which will serve them better in life. And they are now thriving at a different HS.

So what you are saying is your child wasn't accepted and you have no frame of reference aside from your commute

Wow. Thanks for the snark. I was being honest. We did not put it on our list as we would not subject our child to that torture. If we had tortured our child and made them study all summer they might have gotten there, but they might not have. My child scored high enough to get in everywhere but there. We ended up choosing private over our selective offer as we wanted a smaller, more well-rounded environment. And we are truly blessed to have the resources to afford that - I know most don't have that choice. If I had to choose, I would take Bronx Science in a heartbeat over Stuy. Still a big number of academic grinds and awkward kids, but a lot more normal kids and just a more joyful environment while still having incredible resources.

I see dozens of the kids several days a week. They are either a) miserable or b) really poorly adjusted socially. There are definitely plenty of exceptions to that rule. But that is the majority.

I have a HS age child so I am very aware of how normal kids behave - I'm not some 90 year old. My child is not exactly the coolest kid on earth either.

Wow, you SEE kids on the subway and you are immediately able to tell that they are miserable or really poorly adjusted. You are either an extremely gifted clairvoyant with a very uncommon experience (I also take the subway, and it’s rare that I see a kid and think they must be miserable) or you are TA. My bet is on the latter. And some sour grapes with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend who graduated from Stuy years ago commented on the large number of low income students there. School is their way out of poverty so yes they are highly focused and driven. But sometimes that pursuit is at the expense of other things in life. Their life experience and perspectives are also limited because of their family background. Of course students of the TT privates may have the same issue, but from the other extreme.

I commute most days on the subway with lots of Stuy kids. There are plenty of exceptions to the rule, but your explanation is spot on. There are many kids who spent their whole lives studying for this one big test. They have zero social skills and have a glazed look in their eyes. For all of their great exmissions, there are lots of kids who get into Stuy and might do great but end up at CUNY, or perhaps a SUNY. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

The worst ones are the kids who have zero social skills but think they are super cool. There seem to be a lot of them. And they are insufferable.

We did not even consider Stuy for our child. Full disclosure - they scored high enough for every school but Stuy so it would not have been an option. But while those kids were being miserable studying all summer, our kid was being a normal kid, which will serve them better in life. And they are now thriving at a different HS.

So what you are saying is your child wasn't accepted and you have no frame of reference aside from your commute

Wow. Thanks for the snark. I was being honest. We did not put it on our list as we would not subject our child to that torture. If we had tortured our child and made them study all summer they might have gotten there, but they might not have. My child scored high enough to get in everywhere but there. We ended up choosing private over our selective offer as we wanted a smaller, more well-rounded environment. And we are truly blessed to have the resources to afford that - I know most don't have that choice. If I had to choose, I would take Bronx Science in a heartbeat over Stuy. Still a big number of academic grinds and awkward kids, but a lot more normal kids and just a more joyful environment while still having incredible resources.

I see dozens of the kids several days a week. They are either a) miserable or b) really poorly adjusted socially. There are definitely plenty of exceptions to that rule. But that is the majority.

I have a HS age child so I am very aware of how normal kids behave - I'm not some 90 year old. My child is not exactly the coolest kid on earth either.

Agree. would take bx sci over stuy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend who graduated from Stuy years ago commented on the large number of low income students there. School is their way out of poverty so yes they are highly focused and driven. But sometimes that pursuit is at the expense of other things in life. Their life experience and perspectives are also limited because of their family background. Of course students of the TT privates may have the same issue, but from the other extreme.

I commute most days on the subway with lots of Stuy kids. There are plenty of exceptions to the rule, but your explanation is spot on. There are many kids who spent their whole lives studying for this one big test. They have zero social skills and have a glazed look in their eyes. For all of their great exmissions, there are lots of kids who get into Stuy and might do great but end up at CUNY, or perhaps a SUNY. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

The worst ones are the kids who have zero social skills but think they are super cool. There seem to be a lot of them. And they are insufferable.

We did not even consider Stuy for our child. Full disclosure - they scored high enough for every school but Stuy so it would not have been an option. But while those kids were being miserable studying all summer, our kid was being a normal kid, which will serve them better in life. And they are now thriving at a different HS.

So what you are saying is your child wasn't accepted and you have no frame of reference aside from your commute

Wow. Thanks for the snark. I was being honest. We did not put it on our list as we would not subject our child to that torture. If we had tortured our child and made them study all summer they might have gotten there, but they might not have. My child scored high enough to get in everywhere but there. We ended up choosing private over our selective offer as we wanted a smaller, more well-rounded environment. And we are truly blessed to have the resources to afford that - I know most don't have that choice. If I had to choose, I would take Bronx Science in a heartbeat over Stuy. Still a big number of academic grinds and awkward kids, but a lot more normal kids and just a more joyful environment while still having incredible resources.

I see dozens of the kids several days a week. They are either a) miserable or b) really poorly adjusted socially. There are definitely plenty of exceptions to that rule. But that is the majority.

I have a HS age child so I am very aware of how normal kids behave - I'm not some 90 year old. My child is not exactly the coolest kid on earth either.

Wow, you SEE kids on the subway and you are immediately able to tell that they are miserable or really poorly adjusted. You are either an extremely gifted clairvoyant with a very uncommon experience (I also take the subway, and it’s rare that I see a kid and think they must be miserable) or you are TA. My bet is on the latter. And some sour grapes with that.

Nope. No sour grapes. Would not have considered Stuy at all. Felt this way well before I had any idea what my child would get on the SHSAT.

I don't know about your parenting abilities, but when I am in a subway car with a large group of kids I pay attention to their behavior, attitude, etc. I'm not like you just sitting there thinking of ways to be nasty to someone on a message board. I have a child the same age so I have a decent frame of reference. The bulk (but not all) of the kids are either trudging off the train looking like they were up all night studying and haven't had fun in months, or are kids who are the big fish in a small pond socially but who my child (who is far from the coolest kid on earth) would call dorks. I also know plenty of kids who go there who generally fit this description.

And note that I wrote that there are plenty of exceptions to this rule - I am not dumb enough to totally generalize about anything. I know plenty of nice, normal kids who have gone to Stuy - it is a big place.

I am trying to help someone out. You are just looking to pick a fight. My take on Stuy is pretty universal - I'm not making this up.

Let's move on.

[Anonymous]

No question you should choose Packer unless the money is really a hardship. Your kid will get a good education at either but have a superior experience at Packer.

[Anonymous]

everyone gets an A at packer!