Do you call your kids beautiful?

[Anonymous]

Or cute? Handsome?

Is this considered negative now?

[Anonymous]

Yes! When they are feeling down or acting out, I have them look in the mirror and say, “I’m beautiful”. Because they are. Inside and out.

[Anonymous]

Yes
No, not negative, but don't overdo it because you can create a monster that way. I tell them because they don't think they are. Most kids get feedback from other kids and they know who is considered good looking. But you don't need to be Patsy Ramsey.

[Anonymous]

I try to avoid giving physical compliments.

When I was a kid I was told I was beautiful often. So much so I did child modeling.

Then I went through puberty and was not cute. The comments stopped. I noticed and it plummeted my self confidence.

Now I’m a slightly above average looking adult who still struggles deeply with self confidence. I find myself depending on compliments from those around me for self worth. I’m actually in therapy for it.

Perhaps an extreme example but I do avoid giving compliments like this.

[Anonymous]

I do. I also tell them they're smart, kind, funny, generous, etc.

[Anonymous]

My daughters are not beautiful. But they're gorgeous and perfection to my eyes, and I tell them that. They'll also be beautiful and perfect to someone else in the future. I also tell them they're smart, funny, tough, brave, etc. etc. But if they don't hear it from their parents first, how are they going to believe it from their future partners?

[Anonymous]

If they make an effort to dress up or do fancy hair, I'll absolutely tell them they look beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I tell my daughter she’s beautiful, smart, talented, funny, etc. She is all of those things. My dad did and it helped my self-esteem, especially when I was in the awkward stage. My mom did also but not until I was an adult for some reason.

[Anonymous]

Meh, I don't tell them that they are good-looking or beautiful in a direct way. I will tell them that they are looking very good when they are well dressed or they have made me very proud with their accomplishments. So I praise the effort.

I do tell them that if they were ugly or slow, I would have found it very easy to put them in daycare, not breastfeed them and continue my career. Instead I became a happy SAHM because they were so worth it and such a joy to be with.

[Anonymous]

Yes. I tell my girls they are. Along with that they are "kind, clever, worked hard, etc etc". It's not the only thing I notice.

[Anonymous]

They're cute. Not handsome or beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I tell my girls they are. Along with that they are "kind, clever, worked hard, etc etc". It's not the only thing I notice.

+1. Everyone should feel beautiful.

[Anonymous]

If I know they've put a ton of effort into their appearance, I will. Otherwise no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I know they've put a ton of effort into their appearance, I will. Otherwise no.

Exactly - we don't talk a lot about appearances (I remember my mom always said things like "she'd be so pretty if she straightened her hair/ lost a little weight / wore some makeup / got a mani"), but if my dds (tween/teens) dress up for a show or school dance, I will tell them how beautiful they look. If my son (6) dresses up for church and has a fresh hair cut, I will tell him he looks so handsome. He has speech problems (among other things), and when I dress up or wear new earrings, he will tell me, "mommy, you look so handsome." He is the only one to ever notice lol so I'll take it.

[Anonymous]

I do. But I also tell him once in awhile that he’s special TO ME, and not necessarily to others.