If you and your in laws are in the dmv
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Anonymous
| If you and your inlaws both live in the same area (example the dmv) .. how far do you live from each other? How often do you see them? How often do you visit and how often do they visit? Thanks |
Anonymous
| 10 minutes away. Dinner maybe 2x a month. They aren’t the lovey dovey involved type. |
Anonymous
| OP here. We live 20 mins from my inlaws and used to visit every week before things went sour. Now my mil constantly complains that since we live so ‘far’ away she doesn’t have a relationship with my kids and it’s because of me (dil) otherwise her son would never choose to live so far away from his mother. We have been married 26 years.. |
Anonymous
Do you still live 20 minutes away or moved? How old are your kids? |
Anonymous
| We live 15 minutes away from the ILs. We see them maybe once every 4-6 weeks or so, a meal (outside of the holidays) maybe once every three months or so. It was more frequent when the kids were little, but now they’re teenagers and their weekends are busy with sports etc. |
Anonymous
| We live about an hour away. See them about once a month. They usually come to our place unless they’re hosting a broader family get together or something for the holidays. |
Anonymous
| A less than 5 minute car ride. We had rquired Sunday night dinners with them every single week for many years. But they never, ever babysat, not once. They did, however, require that my children stay at their house when they wanted it, without us. I found that bizarre. They are horrible people who treated me so badly that I finally just said, "enough." Ended the dinners, and now I see them about 4 times a year. My spouse sees and talks to them more, and I made sure my kids maintain a nice, respectful relationship with them. But they are awful and I hate them. |
Anonymous
Still 20 mins away. Kids are older now.. 22, 20, and 2 middle schoolers |
Anonymous
Ew. I have co inlaws [divorced] that don't help at all. My DC is treated badly but so is the spouse . So we and my other kids do same sort of little acts of kindness they do for each other or our GC. We see that family with very young GC [20 minutes+distance]at least once per week - plus have done full time child care. Coincides with supplemental childcare needs at their house. Later OP posted kids are teens, young adult, middle school. Those ages all have schedules from school etc. |
Anonymous
Let your DH take the middle schoolers and visit his mom. |
Anonymous
| About 30 minutes without traffic, but during rush hour it can take forever. My in-laws are great, but we’re all busy and only manage to do weekend dinner every 6-8 weeks. But they’re happy to babysit or dog sit as long as they’re in town, and since school is equidistant between houses, my MIL does school pickup a few times a month. |
Anonymous
| OP here. My inlaws never baby sat when I needed help. Always had excuses. But mil baby sat her own daughters kids all these years. She never made any effort to form a relationship with my kids even when we visited her every week. The entire time we were there she would just talk to my DH and discuss her own issues. So it was terrible. She treated my kids and I as if we were invisible and now she blames the 20 min drive and me for her lack of relationship with my kids. |
Anonymous
| 25 mins away. We see them every week! |
Anonymous
| Divorced and both remarried. Both 25 mins away. See MIL 3-4x a year for holidays. See FIL 1-2x a year. Neither babysat. Kids in college now. We made our own plans and were/re closer to my family. My DH prefers my parents. |
Anonymous
| I live 30 minutes from MIL. She works full-time, and so do we, so we only see her about three times a month. I talk to her on the phone probably twice a week, and so does DH. |