Can someone explain “friends” who speak badly behind your back?

[Anonymous]

What’s the reasoning behind this? Why be friends with someone you don’t like or respect?

[Anonymous]

It's an interesting question. I have a life long friend who thinks she is loyal and kind and great company and yet she dishes the dirt and laughs at "good friends" behind their backs. I think she was conditioned to do this by her mean single mother. She just must think it is totally normal and acceptable.

[Anonymous]

Some people are just shit-talkers. That's what they do.

[Anonymous]

Not friends

[Anonymous]

This is my mom and I cannot relate. I don't badmouth my friends. I think for my mother it's a need to feel superior, but she also never learned boundaries and how to manage emotions. She has unrealistic expectations for others which she herself cannot meet (expects favors she would never give) and then she feels anger when people don't meet her impossible expectations.

[Anonymous]

They need something tangible and proximate to hate on. There are billionaires in the world but they will hate you for your small successes just because they see it. They’re weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is my mom and I cannot relate. I don't badmouth my friends. I think for my mother it's a need to feel superior, but she also never learned boundaries and how to manage emotions. She has unrealistic expectations for others which she herself cannot meet (expects favors she would never give) and then she feels anger when people don't meet her impossible expectations.

My mom is the same.

She especially trash talks people who are kind to her, it is never enough.

She goes for people when they are vulnerable, like during a divorce, and is almost gleeful. I have very limited contact.

[Anonymous]

Some people are just very insecure & enjoy talking about others behind their backs as this is what they do to build themselves up.

I guess it is cheaper than therapy. 🤦🏼

I personally would not want these types of people in my life in any way, shape or form.

[Anonymous]

Low self esteem

[Anonymous]

Speaks badly now?

Do think you and your friends are perfect?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Speaks badly now?

Do think you and your friends are perfect?

This is OP. While I’m certainly not perfect I’m trying to figure out why someone I considered a friend and did a huge favor for recently (watched her kids at my home for a week so she could recover from gallbladder surgery) and found out she referred to me as a “witch” with a b to another friend recently.

[Anonymous]

People are fake. Some people keep people around for favors or social life, but they hate them on some level. Friends are overrated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Speaks badly now?

Do think you and your friends are perfect?

This is OP. While I’m certainly not perfect I’m trying to figure out why someone I considered a friend and did a huge favor for recently (watched her kids at my home for a week so she could recover from gallbladder surgery) and found out she referred to me as a “witch” with a b to another friend recently.

Oh I’d drop her in a second.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People are fake. Some people keep people around for favors or social life, but they hate them on some level. Friends are overrated.

+1

Some people are users.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Speaks badly now?

Do think you and your friends are perfect?

This is OP. While I’m certainly not perfect I’m trying to figure out why someone I considered a friend and did a huge favor for recently (watched her kids at my home for a week so she could recover from gallbladder surgery) and found out she referred to me as a “witch” with a b to another friend recently.

No good deed goes unpunished sometimes. Do the fade.