Disliking food at gatherings

[Anonymous]

How do you handle it when a friend or relative invites you over and you just don’t like what they are serving?

I’m not especially picky, but I can seem to force myself to eat food that doesn’t appeal to me. Around the holidays there are some people we visit and I especially dislike everything they make. It’s usually canned soup casseroles, lots bacon involved, tons of heavy cream. I tend to eat prior anticipating there may not be something I want to eat, so generally I’m not that hungry anyhow. However, I feel terribly rude not pretending to like it, and usually just have a drink (though I don’t make any comment about not liking something). Then there is a relative that will always make rude comments if I don’t take a heaping helping. How do you handle these situations?

[Anonymous]

You pretend to like it and push the food around the plate and fill up on the things you can tolerate. Why can't you pretend to like it?

[Anonymous]

Do you have issues around food/eating? Most people have learned what to do in this situation and don't think about it much or make threads about it.

[Anonymous]

Push the food around, jump up early to help clear, Tell nosy aunt Gladys your stomach is a little crampy.

[Anonymous]

Here's what I do ...

Eat before you attend
Simply say no thank you
Don't eat anything
Bring something you prepared or purchased that you like

[Anonymous]

I feel ya. Im a self described picky-tarian and I get mild anxiety when I have to eat other people’s foods. I try to eat first and pick at my plate at least, but more than once I have started drinking on an empty stomach which is it’s own problem I know.

I have also spit stuff into my paper napkin.

About to go to relatives house for a week. I may lose some weight!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here's what I do ...

Eat before you attend
Simply say no thank you
Don't eat anything
Bring something you prepared or purchased that you like

This is weird. Don't do this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's what I do ...

Eat before you attend
Simply say no thank you
Don't eat anything
Bring something you prepared or purchased that you like

This is weird. Don't do this.

I don't think ..
What is weird ?? Feeling pressured to eat foods you don't like want or need.

[Anonymous]

OP, we were recently going to a dinner party at a friends' house where the food is always pretty bad. I love the company but the food is always an afterthought and ranges from mediocre to terrible.

In anticipation of this, I treated myself to a big, late lunch eating something I really enjoy (smothered burrito at my favorite Mexican spot). I showed up at the party not hungry at all, took small servings, ate all the salad and veggie side, pushed the unappetizing main around my plate a bit, and called it a day. I made a point of praising the salad.

I brought dessert to the party so I knew that would be good.

I was not at all annoyed by the bad food because I wasn't hungry and had taken care of my needs separately. So I could just enjoy my friends' great company and not worry about the food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's what I do ...

Eat before you attend
Simply say no thank you
Don't eat anything
Bring something you prepared or purchased that you like

This is weird. Don't do this.

I'm 9:42 and this is just the more concise version of the advice I gave. It works great.

I also recently hosted some people in my house who I know just don't eat much food at all. We did a grazing buffet instead of a sit down meal because I knew they wouldn't want to sit down and eat a bunch of food, and they ate what they wanted (almost nothing, mostly dessert) and the rest of us ate the other food that was out. It was fine and I was not offended. I just want my guests to be comfortable and happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's what I do ...

Eat before you attend
Simply say no thank you
Don't eat anything
Bring something you prepared or purchased that you like

This is weird. Don't do this.

I'm 9:42 and this is just the more concise version of the advice I gave. It works great.

I also recently hosted some people in my house who I know just don't eat much food at all. We did a grazing buffet instead of a sit down meal because I knew they wouldn't want to sit down and eat a bunch of food, and they ate what they wanted (almost nothing, mostly dessert) and the rest of us ate the other food that was out. It was fine and I was not offended. I just want my guests to be comfortable and happy.

I'm 9:22
I absolutely agree with you, your approach and what you offered.
We also don't force folks to eat or drink for that matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, we were recently going to a dinner party at a friends' house where the food is always pretty bad. I love the company but the food is always an afterthought and ranges from mediocre to terrible.

In anticipation of this, I treated myself to a big, late lunch eating something I really enjoy (smothered burrito at my favorite Mexican spot). I showed up at the party not hungry at all, took small servings, ate all the salad and veggie side, pushed the unappetizing main around my plate a bit, and called it a day. I made a point of praising the salad.

I brought dessert to the party so I knew that would be good.

I was not at all annoyed by the bad food because I wasn't hungry and had taken care of my needs separately. So I could just enjoy my friends' great company and not worry about the food.

This is OP. There is one house in particular where I tend to need/want to do this but the host always calls me out! “Why aren’t you eating that? What? Are you on a diet? Are you vegan now (I’m not and they know).” Etc. It’s very uncomfortable

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's what I do ...

Eat before you attend
Simply say no thank you
Don't eat anything
Bring something you prepared or purchased that you like

This is weird. Don't do this.

I don't think ..
What is weird ?? Feeling pressured to eat foods you don't like want or need.

It sounds like OP is going to a dinner party with a casserole. Not a cocktail party. You don't usually bring a dish to someone else's dinner party and just eat that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, we were recently going to a dinner party at a friends' house where the food is always pretty bad. I love the company but the food is always an afterthought and ranges from mediocre to terrible.

In anticipation of this, I treated myself to a big, late lunch eating something I really enjoy (smothered burrito at my favorite Mexican spot). I showed up at the party not hungry at all, took small servings, ate all the salad and veggie side, pushed the unappetizing main around my plate a bit, and called it a day. I made a point of praising the salad.

I brought dessert to the party so I knew that would be good.

I was not at all annoyed by the bad food because I wasn't hungry and had taken care of my needs separately. So I could just enjoy my friends' great company and not worry about the food.

This is what we do too. I can almost always take a bite or two of something, and I have no problem praising it and pretending to like it. Just can't finish it because I am full, but it is so good! etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, we were recently going to a dinner party at a friends' house where the food is always pretty bad. I love the company but the food is always an afterthought and ranges from mediocre to terrible.

In anticipation of this, I treated myself to a big, late lunch eating something I really enjoy (smothered burrito at my favorite Mexican spot). I showed up at the party not hungry at all, took small servings, ate all the salad and veggie side, pushed the unappetizing main around my plate a bit, and called it a day. I made a point of praising the salad.

I brought dessert to the party so I knew that would be good.

I was not at all annoyed by the bad food because I wasn't hungry and had taken care of my needs separately. So I could just enjoy my friends' great company and not worry about the food.

This is OP. There is one house in particular where I tend to need/want to do this but the host always calls me out! “Why aren’t you eating that? What? Are you on a diet? Are you vegan now (I’m not and they know).” Etc. It’s very uncomfortable

Yes! We have neighbors and family as such ..
We recently moved into our neighborhood .. and one family is ALWAYS forcing food on us.
I had to ask my husband -- Do we look hungry?
We're constantly graciously declining