How would you handle this - conflict of interest?

[Anonymous]

I’m being a bit vague on purpose, but in my job we work with a small department within an agency. I do not work in the agency.

A few months ago at a hotel bar after a conference a man sat next to me and we got chatting. I was drinking water and he got increasingly drunk and claimed that, were Trump to win, he was on a short list to lead the small department. Eventually he turned from professional to not (such as sexual comments) I excused myself. I didn’t realize he’d followed me, but he was waiting for me outside the bathroom in the lobby “to continue our conversation”, which made me very uncomfortable. A guest walking by saw this and intervened and that was that. Although I introduced myself and the man knows where I work, I would be very surprised if we crossed paths if he remembered me.

Well, now I’m leading a project that works with that department. I feel like I sound a bit crazy if I approach the ethics office on the off chance that this man ends up leading the department during the project and remembers me. And even if he did is that an ethics problem? But if I start on this project and it becomes a problem it will be challenging for my employer (and me) to have to deal with it then.

What would you do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m being a bit vague on purpose, but in my job we work with a small department within an agency. I do not work in the agency.

A few months ago at a hotel bar after a conference a man sat next to me and we got chatting. I was drinking water and he got increasingly drunk and claimed that, were Trump to win, he was on a short list to lead the small department. Eventually he turned from professional to not (such as sexual comments) I excused myself. I didn’t realize he’d followed me, but he was waiting for me outside the bathroom in the lobby “to continue our conversation”, which made me very uncomfortable. A guest walking by saw this and intervened and that was that. Although I introduced myself and the man knows where I work, I would be very surprised if we crossed paths if he remembered me.

Well, now I’m leading a project that works with that department. I feel like I sound a bit crazy if I approach the ethics office on the off chance that this man ends up leading the department during the project and remembers me. And even if he did is that an ethics problem? But if I start on this project and it becomes a problem it will be challenging for my employer (and me) to have to deal with it then.

What would you do?

Probably not. Does this guy even work in that "small department" yet? An lot more folks think they will get appointments than actually get them.

I wouldn't "approach the ethics office." But I would let your boss know what happened, and that you are concerned. And be ready to deal with him if he is a problem in the future.

[Anonymous]

I would ignore it and pretend I've never seen him before. It's very likely he won't remember you.

I don't think hitting on someone at a bar and hanging out outside a lobby bathroom qualifies as an ethics problem.

[Anonymous]

If he's really scuzzy he'll do new scuzzy things once you're working together and you can report those.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Sorry - I meant approach our ethics office to get assigned to a different project or to have a plan in the off chance this becomes an issue. I don’t know if advice / information we produce could have any appearance of bias under this circumstance. I’m not trying to do anything about his possible (albeit unlikely) appointment.

[Anonymous]

Lol what? Are you new to DC? “I’m on the short list to do X” is the most basic of pickup lines imaginable. He’s a low level non-political staff somewhere and the fact you think a random drunk guy from a bar is eventually going to be your boss to the point you’d go to ethics (!!!) is very bizarre.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol what? Are you new to DC? “I’m on the short list to do X” is the most basic of pickup lines imaginable. He’s a low level non-political staff somewhere and the fact you think a random drunk guy from a bar is eventually going to be your boss to the point you’d go to ethics (!!!) is very bizarre.

This. Ops overreaction is so odd to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Sorry - I meant approach our ethics office to get assigned to a different project or to have a plan in the off chance this becomes an issue. I don’t know if advice / information we produce could have any appearance of bias under this circumstance. I’m not trying to do anything about his possible (albeit unlikely) appointment.

What do you mean "have a plan in the off chance this becomes an issue"? What kind of plan would an ethics office create? That makes no sense. You deal with a problem when and if you have one.

[Anonymous]

Op here - yes, I assumed it was a pickup line (although we are both married) but when I looked him / his relationship with Trump up it seems not completely delusional.

We work on projects where we basically consult for an agency for a year or so. I’m just starting the project so the plan would be to get assigned elsewhere, which I agree seems like an over reaction. But if he were to get an appointment and we were 8 or 9 months into the project that would be annoying to deal with. I will ignore it though!

[Anonymous]

You are making up things to worry about.

[Anonymous]

Don’t borrow trouble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would ignore it and pretend I've never seen him before. It's very likely he won't remember you.

I don't think hitting on someone at a bar and hanging out outside a lobby bathroom qualifies as an ethics problem.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here - yes, I assumed it was a pickup line (although we are both married) but when I looked him / his relationship with Trump up it seems not completely delusional.

We work on projects where we basically consult for an agency for a year or so. I’m just starting the project so the plan would be to get assigned elsewhere, which I agree seems like an over reaction. But if he were to get an appointment and we were 8 or 9 months into the project that would be annoying to deal with. I will ignore it though!

Lay off the weed ma'am, this goes beyond paranoia

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here - yes, I assumed it was a pickup line (although we are both married) but when I looked him / his relationship with Trump up it seems not completely delusional.

We work on projects where we basically consult for an agency for a year or so. I’m just starting the project so the plan would be to get assigned elsewhere, which I agree seems like an over reaction. But if he were to get an appointment and we were 8 or 9 months into the project that would be annoying to deal with. I will ignore it though!

Lay off the weed ma'am, this goes beyond paranoia

I think OP just thinks she's more important than she is. This guy is a sleaze and hits on women all the time. He won't even remember OP.

[Anonymous]

So you possibly think the ethical angle is that he may pressure you for sex so your firm gets work? If that’s the concern tell your boss.