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I’m trying to keep things as amicable as possible.
I DO NOT want him served at work. I know it would devastate him and make things awkward for him; he’s a very private person and I won’t do that to him. We are still living in the same house, but he’s staying exclusively in the basement. He’s not one to answer the door for solicitors, especially right now, and he can’t hear any knocking from downstairs anyway; we don’t have a Ring or similar doorbell, or ANY doorbell for that matter. They tried to catch him at home twice and their knocks went unanswered. They told me that they don’t have endless hours to stalk him or follow him, so I need to decide a place soon, or they will serve him at work. I have no idea what to do. Any ideas? |
| OP again: he doesn’t go to a gym or any other place frequently. |
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Trolls are out today! All hopped up on candy, I see.
Can you just plan to be out of the house on a certain date when you know he will be home and have them come by then? It's noble of you to want to protect his privacy. |
| You don't need to have him served if he agrees. That would be the first place I started. |
| You want an amicable divorce and at the same time serve him. Women they don't stop amazing me lol |
| Why do you need to have him served w papers if it is an amicable divorce? |
| People routinely agree to accept service at a mutually convenient place and time. It’s inconceivable that an attorney/process server haven’t suggested this. |
| Does your husband know you have filed/are filing? If this is amicable, I would assume that you both have already hammered out the agreement. So why not just ask him him how he would like to proceed? You dont need to go the Sheriff-serving-papers-in-a-dramatic-fashion route. They can be served via certified mail, to a trusted friends house, etc. |
Exactly. He only gets served if he refuses to sign the mailed document. |
Because OP is enthralled with the drama of it all. |
| What time does he leave home for work? Serve him then. |
| Good heavens, ask your lawyer! |
| Usually lawyers accept service for their clients. Have your lawyer send the documents to his lawyer. |
NP. Try to read with better comprehension. OP says she is "trying to keep it amicable." That is not at all the same thing as "an amicable divorce" already settled on both sides. And the many PPs here assuming it's easy just to "hammer out" an agreeement, as one person puts it, are being pretty naive; sometimes, one spouse puts their head in the sand and will do absolutely nothing at all until the other spouse has to force the issue by serving papers. That might be OP's case here but everyone's assuming otherwise. OP, talk to your attorney ASAP, so that the server doesn't just go to his workplace, if you truly want to avoid that. The attorney surely has dealt with this before--? Is he, as I suspect from your post, resisting even discussing divorce, and that's why you have to have him served? I'm sorry. The fact that you are trying to keep it amicable sounds to me as if you're a bit afraid of how he'll react if has any heads-up that you are filing for divorce. I hope that soon you won't have to walk on eggshells any more, if that's what's going on now. Ignore the knee-jerk PPs here who insist that your'e just into drama; they love to bash whatever is outside their own personal experience or understanding. |
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Why do you need to serve him? If you don't file divorce, you can start with amicable mediation (much cheaper). Mediation is the much more straight forward, cost effective solution.
But lawyers always push you to file, so they can start billing you. You don't have to file yet. |