What do you wish you had received after parents death

Anonymous
Not sure if this is the right forum but my best friends parent just passed very suddenly and I’m seeking advice.

She is on her way into town. Of course I will physically accompany her, but what are some material things you wish you had or found comfort in immediately after parents passing? I would like to bring things too. Will prepare food. Thank you.
Anonymous
Boxes.
Anonymous
A memory that you have of your friends parents is the most precious thing you can give.
Anonymous
I'm not sure what you mean by she is on her way into town. And where are you accompanying her too?

I would bring some protein bars.
Anonymous
A donation to my dad’s favorite charity was what I appreciated when he passed a few years ago. That and sharing a nice memory of them.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure what you mean by she is on her way into town. And where are you accompanying her too?

I would bring some protein bars.


??
Anonymous
I just needed time to grieve. I never really got the time. Between arranging the service, settling his estate and selling his condo, I was just overwhelmed. Don't really know how you can help. My friend came and helped me get rid of some of his stuff. It is such a difficult task.
Anonymous
Someone helped me go through all her clothes and throw things out and pick out her outfit for the burial. That was super helpful.

Wine and food is enough I didn't really need anything else.
Anonymous
The best gift you can give is your time. Spend time with your grieving friend and help them with any tasks they need help with. Give them a shoulder to cry on if that’s what they need.
Anonymous
Offer to help do things. Or better yet, just do them if you can see what needs to be done.
Anonymous
Thank you for all the advice. Going through stuff will be an enormous task. I will bring boxes too when she’s ready.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure what you mean by she is on her way into town. And where are you accompanying her too?

I would bring some protein bars.


??


I live in her hometown and she is returning here to make all the arrangements. I meant I will accompany her as in I will be with her as much as possible to assist. Thank you -
Anonymous
Listen. Don’t tell her she’s “holding up beautifully,” or is “brave.” Let her cry or rant if she needs it. Just be willing to walk along side and validate whatever real emotions she is experiencing.

Practically, you’ll have a better idea when she arrives what you can take off her shoulders. You sound like a lovely friend.
Anonymous
Kindness and inclusion from my family. Nothing from others.
Anonymous
A family friend told me people would converge right after my mom's death and be there through the funeral and then never talk to me about it again. She was right, and she also never talked to me again. I wish people had kept reaching out.

My mom and I didn't have the best relationship but there were some things I only talked with her about and since she died I've had nobody to talk about Simone Biles with, or the new flower place I found around the corner from work, or .... and on and on.
post reply Forum Index » Eldercare
Message Quick Reply
Go to: