If you get overstimulated easily, how do you deal?
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Anonymous
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My entire life I’ve tended to get overstimulated easily. I could never do concerts (or even music at home), clubs, large groups, etc.
I have 2 young kids and an H, and most days I feel like breaking down. The toddler screams all the time, the 8 yo complains, H is super loud. It feels like I’m being bombarded from every angle. Plus throw in a dog, the phone going off, the never ending to-do list, and most days I feel like I can barely function. Tonight at dinner everyone was just being so LOUD I had to get up and leave. I got in the shower to calm down. Most of the time when someone tries to talk to me, I can’t even process what they’re saying because I’m hearing 2-3 other people talking and my anxiety from it all is through the roof. A few nights ago H took the kids out for the evening and I forgot how nice it is to just do the dishes in silence so I can relax and actually hear myself think for once. I don’t want to be one of those moms who screams at everyone to be quiet, and I do believe kids have the right to be loud. I just can’t take when everyone is making noise all at once. |
Anonymous
| Can you wear discreet ear plugs that will help dampen (but not mute) the sound? |
Anonymous
| It sounds like you have sensory processing issues. I’ve had them my whole life. The short answer is Bose headphones. But they aren’t a total fix. Nothing is. |
Anonymous
OP. Yea, I think I do. It’s always taken my brain a few seconds to process when people are talking to me, which makes them just yell at me louder, which makes it worse. |
Anonymous
| They make discreet ear plugs that dampen sound. Loop is one brand. I don't use them because I became partially deaf, which I think might be my super power. I wear sunglasses and hats all the time and meditate. |
Anonymous
| For me, popping in headphones and listening to to music, an audiobook, or podcast. I remove myself as best I can, sometimes that means I’ll go for a walk, sometimes I’ll go upstairs to start laundry, sometimes I’ll shower. All of these act as “resets” for me. |
Anonymous
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Don’t have more kids!!!
The teen years are quieter, they are gone more or retreat to their rooms. Then you’ll miss them 
Have your dh take your kids out of the house more. Sunday mornings, 3 hour dad date. Something you can look forward to. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
Noise-cancelling headphones are getting better and more common. Buy a good set, and don’t be afraid to wear them wherever. Visual overstimulation is a tougher one. You mostly need to just avoid thos locations or situations. Have you considered spending more time at home where you will have more control over sight and sound? |
Anonymous
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1. I had a hairdresser who wore earplugs. She could hear me, but they helped her with the noise of all the hairdryers and music and people yelling to be heard over them. Can you wear earplugs?
2. Train your kids. Sure sometimes toddlers will be loud but really work on yours learning to not interrupt, no whining, only being loud when on the playground or in an emergency. Teach the older one they can only complain about something ONCE. They state their complaint, you acknowledge hearing them, and that's it. Or let them have a Complaint Log, where they write out their complaints to you and you write back each night. 3. Turn your ringer off or super low. 4. Train your dog to not bark. I hear you on this - I had to go to a dinner at Benihana and found it VERY overwhelming and by the time we were walking out I'd shut down quite a bit. It was too loud to make conversation, my nerves were frayed from all the slamming of spatulas on the grill and lights flashing and people yelling, etc. I truly couldn't go to another event three nights later - just couldn't make myself show up. |
Anonymous
DP. I get overstimulated by sound, and where discreet noise-canceling headphones do dampen sound, but DH gets annoyed and has zero empathy, and my kids think I'm weird, so more often than not, I'm tortured. It's the worst on car trips when we're all trapped together, and there is fighting, phone/iPad noise, and radio noise, and in those cases, I wear my noise-canceling headphones without apology. Work is a retreat because it's mostly quiet, and no one cares that I wear headphones. |
Anonymous
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For issues with visual overstimulation, they make glasses which limit peripheral vision.
These can really help. Also help with focus too! |
Anonymous
| I'm an early childhood teacher and I am super overstimulated by noise. Yeah. Not good. |
Anonymous
| Alone time and silence is really the only thing that works. |
Anonymous
| Depressants, exercise, yoga, workaholism…life is good lol. |