Adult babysitters not wanted?

[Anonymous]

I’m a mom of 3 who would love to make a little cash by babysitting. Changes in employment between DH and me have led me to this decision (and kids are expensive!).

I live in a neighborhood with tons of families always looking for a sitter. I have shown interest and availability but families seem to be choosing local teens/ nanny. My rate is $18/hr for up to two kids and $20 for three or more which seems low/average. I have offered to help people looking for pre-school help/driving, late nights and all in between.

I haven’t shared I need the money publicly as I don’t want pity jobs, but what’s the deal? I am not bringing my own kids so that’s not the issue. Do people just prefer teens to help them out?

[Anonymous]

I can't speak for everyone, but I am in the market for a babysitter, not to use often or regularly but to kind of "have in hand" if something comes up. I would feel kind of presumptuous or rude reaching out to a fully-employed adult to meet me/my kid, have a short paid hang out session to get to know each other, and keep her number for occasional, intermittent use going forward. I feel like a teenager's time is less valuable and their income options are more limited so saying "can you come over to meet DD for two hours on Thursday just to play some games or go to the playground while I make dinner and we can see if it's a fit?" is not a waste of their time. But I'd feel like it was a crazy ask from a mom with kids of her own.

[Anonymous]

$18 an hour? Wow

[Anonymous]

Teens don’t judge messy houses, bad parenting, adult decision making, etc.

I don’t want another adult in my life to see and judge my shortcomings. Even if the adult does “work” for me, I’d be concerned they would think less of me for how I raise my kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:$18 an hour? Wow

Should this person charge more? I’d love to pay $18/ hr. We pay $30/35.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teens don’t judge messy houses, bad parenting, adult decision making, etc.

I don’t want another adult in my life to see and judge my shortcomings. Even if the adult does “work” for me, I’d be concerned they would think less of me for how I raise my kids.

+1

Older babysitters sometimes share their 'thoughts' on such matters. I'd rather have a young person who is smart and responsible but DNGAF about my house.

[Anonymous]

When I use 'adult' babysitters (i.e., people with their own kids/families/other jobs), I do always feel a bit guilty about asking them to sit during the day on weekends or asking them to extend or come early or, like a pp mentioned, to come over for just a few hours. I know this is totally irrational since they agreed and I am paying them!! But maybe folks are feeling that way? Or, if you are a neighbor and are already friendly with each other, they may not want to spoil the good relationship you already have with 'business'.

In any case, I would find your regional Facebook group for babysitters (e.g., I am in one for Northern Virginia) and post there explaining your situation, and I am sure you will get outreach!

And increase your rate to at least $20 for 1 - $18 is too low.

[Anonymous]

People don't feel comfortable hiring people they consider as "peers" for this kind of thing. It feels awkward because they want it to feel like a hierarchical relationship (employer-employee) and that's a lot easier with a local teen than with a fellow mom.

It's the same reason people are less likely to hire a neighbor to clean their house or take care of their lawn.

I would try advertising in another nearby neighborhood. I did some babysitting when my DD was an infant and I needed extra cash and that's what I did -- I babysat for families in a suburb adjacent to where I lived. I advertised on nanny.com instead of using local list serves or word-of-mouth. I think it helped the people who hired me to see me as a babysitter and not as an equal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People don't feel comfortable hiring people they consider as "peers" for this kind of thing. It feels awkward because they want it to feel like a hierarchical relationship (employer-employee) and that's a lot easier with a local teen than with a fellow mom.

It's the same reason people are less likely to hire a neighbor to clean their house or take care of their lawn.

I would try advertising in another nearby neighborhood. I did some babysitting when my DD was an infant and I needed extra cash and that's what I did -- I babysat for families in a suburb adjacent to where I lived. I advertised on nanny.com instead of using local list serves or word-of-mouth. I think it helped the people who hired me to see me as a babysitter and not as an equal.

Oh and also I agree that $18 is too low -- people will be suspicious of someone who charges below market rate and that suspicion will double if you aren't the demographic they are expecting (meaning not younger). They will wonder why you are devaluing your time or why you don't feel you can charge the going rate.

[Anonymous]

I don't want adults because I want to pay a high schooler wage. I'm in a DC suburb and $15 is the going rate for babysitters. $20 for daycare teachers who babysit on the side. My kids are so easy and honestly really like the high school girls who will sit and play games for hours. They look up to the high school girls and they wouldn't a mom. I have a weekly babysitter from 8-12. Kids go to sleep at 9/9:30 so the vast majority of the time is spent watching Netflix.

Maybe lead with what your rate is when you contact them? I don't message the older women who respond to my ads because I don't want them to tell me their rate is $30. And I don’t think the older women (I mean 25+ age) get on the floor and play.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to market yourself better.

Experienced mom of 3. Infant/child CPR and first aid certified. Available for late nights and overnights.

You need to stand out as the best option for moms that value what you have to offer. Also I’d raise your rates to $20 per hour for the first 1-2 kids.

[Anonymous]

You probably don’t have references either. No one cares if you are raising kids, you need a portfolio to share perspective families. You should lower your rates until you have a professional book.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't hire a parent - I don't want you telling me how to parent my kids. A teenager knows they know nothing and are more open to taking direction.

[Anonymous]

I think my kids find teens funner! They do not want another mom to come over. They wants a very cool teen. Now if I had an infant, I would be grateful for an experienced mom or grandma.

[Anonymous]

Also I’d add that you’re a college grad and can help with homework.