Does being overweight feel like late pregnancy?

Anonymous
I’m 31 weeks and my lower back hurts, it’s challenging to walk long distances and I feel hot and tired all the time. So far I’ve gained about 20 lbs. My DH (who is overweight), says that this is what it feels like to be overweight, and I’m just not used to it. He says that this is what it feels like to be at a higher BMI and that most people get used to it. Is that true? If you have been both overweight and pregnant at some point, does your back hurt and you are out of breath and hot all the time?
Anonymous
No. It is not the same (I’ve been thin, fat, and pregnant starting from thin). Tell him to STFU and stop mansplaining pregnancy to you.
Anonymous
Your husband's being a typically over dramatic man. No gaining 20.pounds outside of pregnancy wouldn't likely cause all those symptoms. You're hot and tired because you're expending extra calories to make a person. Your organs are being squished by the baby and your diaphragm space so you aren't getting as much breath in (try singing while pregnant, you really feel the difference). Your weight distribution is very different than someone who just gained weight, plus the hormones causing your muscles to loosen.

So, no, this is nit what being a little overweight is like. He needs to get over himself. And if he really feels that bad being overweight, he should go see a doctor.
Anonymous
Also your hormones from pregnancy contribute to some of the miserable symptoms.
Anonymous
Obese people can feel the few specific symptoms you mentioned, but overall, pregnancy is different. There’s way more going on during pregnancy than weight gain, and during pregnancy, the changes take place rapidly. You may get an inkling of what it feels like to be overweight, but your dh has no clue what pregnancy feels like.
Anonymous
Overweight is not the same as pregnant, as PP's have pointed out. And even if it were, you are not used to it...so it's uncomfortable. And in your case, the situation is temporary and rapidly getting worse in the meantime.

No matter what, your DH is being a a$$ by making this comment.
Anonymous
I've been obese my entire adult life. My back doesn't hurt. I've always been able to walk a long distance. I can't stand still but that's mostly boredom than anything else. Am not hot or tired unless it's hot out and I haven't slept.
Anonymous
This sounds like a husband who's going to complain you squeezed his hand too hard when you were pushing or complain about his back from sleeping on the hospital cot and make it worse than whatever you go through giving birth. Watch out.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I’m 31 weeks and my lower back hurts, it’s challenging to walk long distances and I feel hot and tired all the time. So far I’ve gained about 20 lbs. My DH (who is overweight), says that this is what it feels like to be overweight, and I’m just not used to it. He says that this is what it feels like to be at a higher BMI and that most people get used to it. Is that true? If you have been both overweight and pregnant at some point, does your back hurt and you are out of breath and hot all the time?


No.

Get thee to a PT program and start strengthening your TVAs - learn to hug the baby- and inner thighs/butt. Bloom Method or GetMomStrong are great options. Also look into some pregnancy specific movements for your pelvis.

You're hot because you have extra gallons of blood and a growing human in your core region. Your hormones are increasing. You are tired because its a very metabolically active time and your body needs rest and nourishment.

See if a belly band or kinesiotape will help with the walking. I get BH contractions when walking too far/being out and about for too long, but I can do about a mile without any issues as long as I tape my belly. My child is also measuring over 6lbs and I have a month to go so that doesnt feel outside of expectations for me.

Ask to get your iron and other stuff retested if you are really feeling run down.

Anonymous
I had a relatively uneventful twin pregnancy that went full-term and later managed to hit just about that same weight on my own (not great, but that's another story). Late pregnancy was WAY worse - sciatica, exhaustion, sleeplessness, heartburn, general pain. When I was that weight just from "normal" obesity, I felt pretty much fine (if not very happy with myself).
Anonymous
No, that’s what it feels like to not have muscles.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I’m 31 weeks and my lower back hurts, it’s challenging to walk long distances and I feel hot and tired all the time. So far I’ve gained about 20 lbs. My DH (who is overweight), says that this is what it feels like to be overweight, and I’m just not used to it. He says that this is what it feels like to be at a higher BMI and that most people get used to it. Is that true? If you have been both overweight and pregnant at some point, does your back hurt and you are out of breath and hot all the time?


Not for me. I have been overweight up to the point of obesity and pregnant twice. My weight is distributed more evenly when I'm overweight so my back doesn't hurt. And my organs aren't squished so I'm not out of breath all the time. That said, I do know people who carry their weight differently - like GIANT boobs - and have back pains associated with that. And I was always relatively "fit" even when overweight so the out of breath thing could be true for your DH if he has poor cardiovascular health.

However, he needs to STFU telling you that *he* knows what being pregnant feels like and you should just get used to it. He has no idea what he's talking about, he's just looking for an excuse to ignore what you're going through. Red flag.
Anonymous
No it doesn't feel the same. I recently weighed more than my pregnancy weight and it did not feel anything like being 9 month pregnant. Yes when you're overweight you may have more aches and not be in great shape so you get winded easily but pregnancy is totally different.
Anonymous
Gotta tell you, your husband sounds like a jerk. You're making a person and he's manplaining pregnancy and trying to make it sound like he has it worse? Is this a pattern for him? Be careful and don't tolerate this behavior. This can turn into a guy who just can't help out with any childcare because he's just so tired.
Anonymous
Hubby is an ass. Not remotely the same, speaking from experience.
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