Life is so hard, what's the point
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Anonymous
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I need life advice on how to keep a positive outlook when life keeps throwing terrible situations my way. I do not have any thoughts of self harm, but I'm so despondent. It's making me wonder what the point of life is.
In short, every person in my family has had some random (not genetic) serious, life changing issue in the last four years. My youngest developed a rare, painful eye disease, and lost sight in one eye. My middle son has severe mental health issues, with inpatient stays. My oldest was in a severe automobile accident, crushing the left side of his body, resulting in multiple surgeries, rods, metal plates. My husband has a lifelong disease, was put in a coma, has had four major surgeries, and is fully, permanently disabled, unable to work. My mom was diagnosed with an incurable disease, she will be in chronic pain for the remainder of her life. She's in and out of hospitals. I could go on, but that's just my immediate family. I am healthy, thankfully. But now I'm back in the cycle of hospital-stop by home-work-hospital. I'm the glue and I'm so so tired. I have a good career and keep all of this from affecting my work, as it's all I have to catch a mental break. I have family support (not locally, but they've offered to come out), and they are as shocked as I am by how life has turned out for us. I know many find solace in religion. I grew up Catholic, but haven't practiced in years. At this rate I'm praying to anyone and everyone. I'm manifesting and anything else I can do to keep my spirits up. But the truth is I am so so broken. Please give me some solace. I don't know what else to do. I'm just taking my tasks in 30 minute increments, and trying hard not to sink. |
Anonymous
I am so sorry that you and your family have been hit so hard. You absolutely must take care of yourself both physically and emotionally. God bless you and give you the strength needed to carry on. |
Anonymous
| hugs and strength to you, OP. I am sorry you are dealing with so much. I ask the same thing sometimes, and don't know the answer, but know that I live to help out everyone in my family get through life, do my best to get myself through this life and hope to leave my mark on the world before my time is up. Our time on earth is short and I suppose we are here to make the most of it and help others one day at a time. Maybe work on adding some small positive thing to your life. |
Anonymous
| I found an online meditation app and therapy with a LCSW worked well for me. My BIL prefers Headspace and I prefer Calm. I also walk everyday. |
Anonymous
| Anti anxiety medication and meditation. |
Anonymous
I will also encourage you to check out some of the parent groups that NAMI runs. A few of my friends swear by them. |
Anonymous
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OP, I am so sorry you and your family are dealing with all of this. Anyone in your situation would be feeling overwhelmed and confused and sad.
To your question, I don't know if there *is* a point to life, per se. Biologically, we're kind of just here to eat and reproduce and die--and that's ok. There doesn't have to be a bigger point to all of this for it to be real. But you can decide to assign more meaning to your life: either through religion, or just by recognizing your role in the web of life--you affect other people, they affect you, and we all affect the plants and animals we share this planet with. And life doesn't necessarily have to have a "point" to have joyful or beautiful moments. I'm sure those moments seem distant and few right now, OP, but I hope you will think back fondly to the ones you have experienced and hold hope that you will have more good times to come. |
Anonymous
| OP, so sorry you have to go through this. Bug hug. Instead of trying to find solace in religion, can you talk to God and listen? I hope you will find the answers. |
Anonymous
| OP I feel you and I can relate so I wish I could offer you a hug but I can't. I don't know how my life has got to where it is or how to find my way out. But what has helped me a little is literally sitting still on my couch and deep breathing for 15 mins. call it meditation call it whatever and I try to think about nothing but breathing. I'm also taking hot baths sometimes I'm able to read sometimes I can't. I pray daily I don't feel it doing much but it's perhaps someone who can hear my cries, prayers, (little) hopes and wishes. I hope you find peace. Know that you're not alone sister. |
Anonymous
| This sounds really hard. I’m sorry. My advice would be to talk to your doctor and specifically ask about medication and for help in finding an in-person support group. I think medication could help lighten your mental load and a support group would make you feel less alone. These things helped me when I was going through cancer treatment. |
Anonymous
| I'm sorry, OP. That is a lot to deal with. |
Anonymous
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I am sorry. It's a lot.
As someone with hardly any family or friends it does seem the larger your circle the more trauma you encounter. |
Anonymous
| That is it. The suffering is the point. Look ip the 4 Noble truths as told by the Buddha. |
Anonymous
| OP, what you're going through is outsized pain for anyone. Talk to your doctor about medication. If you think taking a family member up on their offer of help might give you a break and support, let them come for a long weekend or week. |
Anonymous
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OP here - thanks for the comments. I'm taking them all in.
Re: NAMI, I did take their Family to Family course last fall. It was a god send. |