I’m terribly sad and just want to vent

[Anonymous]

My father is starting to lose his memory and he knows it’s happening. He is scared. I’m heartbroken for what his future holds. He’s 92. I know this is the end. But I’m having a really hard time. I’ve always had a special bond with him. I actually ache for his fear and wish he could just be peacefully released from this life. He is the first person that loved me unconditionally. It’s really hard to watch this.

Thanks for listening…

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry OP. My dad is 91 and this is my worst fear.

[Anonymous]

It's not easy to watch someone who you viewed as a "constant" in your life no longer be that. You can't stop it, but you can slow it down through various medications, better nutrition, regular exercise, etc... If you keep his mind focused on those things as palliative, he'll feel more in control and less anxious about it.

[Anonymous]

I am sorry.

Someone said that grief is the price we pay for love.

People do not understand how sad you can be even losing a very elderly parent, because you have not known the world without him.

I understand. You will show him your love for as long as he is here. That is how you will honor him.

You are so lucky to have had a loving parent. And he is lucky that you appreciate who he has been.

Be gentle with yourself. But you can do this.

[Anonymous]

So sorry, OP.

You sound like you have a wonderful relationship with him

[Anonymous]

Losing his memory now past 90? Honestly you should both consider yourselves lucky. My 73 yo father is starting to lose it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Losing his memory now past 90? Honestly you should both consider yourselves lucky. My 73 yo father is starting to lose it.

So you should understand it is hard.

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry, OP. That’s so very hard.

Holding you and your dad in the light.

[Anonymous]

I am sorry, OP This part of the journey is hard.

A suggestion -- record your father telling you about what it was like growing up. Create an archive of these recordings so you have his voice nearby for you. Such precious times.

[Anonymous]

It’s hard no matter what age they are. I’m sorry, OP. My dad wasn’t that old but he was frightened. My heart broke.

He sounds like a wonderful father.

[Anonymous]

He will lose older memories last, so talk to him about the olden days - try talking about when you were little, and if he can't always remember those, talk to him about his childhood. He will be worse in the evenings, and music from older time periods will be soothing.

[Anonymous]

You are a wonderful daughter but please know that at 92 this is, sadly, normal. Keep in mind that you have had this love in your life for a very long time. Now you need to think about how you take on the role of his parent and help him deal with this stage in his life.

[Anonymous]

Yes, it's normal but it's still sad when you go through it. Sorry, OP.

[Anonymous]

All fathers would love to have you as their daughter. Your dad is a very lucky man and I’m sure he knows it.

[Anonymous]

I hope you understand how beautiful it is to hear the compassion that you have for him. Someone taught you well how to be a good human being. I hope that’s something that can lessen your pain.